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Bully 10 year old neihbor and shreeking child screaming

Posted: Jul 10, 2010

Unsure how to deal with this. We have neighbors facing our back yard who have a little girl, probably maybe 7 or 8 years old. Cute as pie, plays nicely, just very nice little girl. On the other side of them is a 10 or 11 year old kid and he is a bully...and boy do I mean a bully. He is constantly picking on her which in turns makes her squeal at this high pitched ear piercing scream (if you know what I mean). He sprays water on her and she keeps yelling at him to stop. Parents are too wrapped up inside with whatever to even care (or so it seems) what happens to their little girl when she is outside in the back yard (they keep their door closed). Our neighbor before them had the same problem. The bully kid would come over and pester his two little girls and the guy used to keep telling this kid to go home and he would keep coming over and picking on the girls. So they moved out and new people with little girl moves in. A few days ago the neighbors were away for the day and the kid was over spraying water in through their windows (which were open) with the hose. DH twice has yelled over for the kid to stop it. The first time he yelled out "Hey, stop it over there". The kid yelled back "I'm just a kid playing". DH said well your upsetting the girl and making her cry, go back to your house and leave her alone. We were waiting for the parents to come out but they didn't. Then a few days ago he had to yell again (the ear piercing shreaking was uncontrollable). He said "Hey, I thought I told you to stop it". The kid didn't say anything. Now the kid is back, she's shreaking and staying stop it and he says (using the full word) "I don't f'n, f'n, f'n f'n care." Meanwhile we look over and his mother is sitting in her backyard outside talking to someone over there and she doesn't do anything.

Does anyone have any suggestions. Talking to them is out of the question becasue they are out of their mind and don't care what their kids are doing. I'm tempted to yell out the next time, watch your language, but DH doesn't want any trouble. A few weeks ago we heard him playing with some other boy and he said "lets climb over the fence and steal their stuff (we have a covered porch so they didn't know we could hear them, but as they started to climb up the fence DH said what are you doing? They jumped down and ran off.

I understand kids playing. I love to watch and hear kids playing but this kid is a big big bully. Then we just read in the newspaper a young teenager in our town raped and killed a 7 year old girl. What is wrong with society?

Maybe there is no answers (except to move). Thanks for reading my "vent".

;

Sounds like where I live with all the shrieking - lindawordlady

[ In Reply To ..]
I live in an apartment and have been here more than 2 years. Lately, there is a huge turnover and more kids than usual. They seem to play right outside my window where I work, screaming, one always picking on the other and the like. I have asked them nicely to quiet it down but it does not last. They are NOT supposed to play between the buildings but no one enforces it. I talked to the caretaker who is also fairly new and get nowhere with him either. Less than 2 months ago someone moved in above me and I swear they rearrange their living room 2-3 times a week or they are exercising and stomping on the floors. It just grates on me to no end. I bet the person below me has never even heard me walk across the floor. I understanding walking and squeeking floors but sounds like a herd of elephants up there. Last nite, I took my cane and hit the ceiling a couple times and I know they heard it, but it is never-ending. All I ask for is a little piece and quiet. I like kids too and let them play, but not outside my balcony where I have my window open.

I told the caretaker there is a park just 1 block down from us and why can't those parents take them there? He said, well, they are kids, I cannot ask them to do that, but I should put up with it???? Aggravates me to no end. Believe it or not, that is the only time I get angry, is when I heard these loud noises. Maybe you could knock on the parents door and let them know your observations and it is disruptive to you to hear this all day long. I swear these kids are all raising themselves while most of parents have a cell phone glued to their ear!!!

neighbors from h*** - OHMT

[ In Reply To ..]
I have a family just like that directly across the street from me. Parents don't care and, in fact, encourage their little demons to terrorize the neighborhood. The mother has called the cops on every one of us neighbors. We have had to put up with this for about 16 years now.

What has happened to society in the year 2010? - help!

[ In Reply To ..]
I just don't understand it. Call me naive but I just think it's wrong. These parents sometimes are outside and watch the kids picking on each other and don't say anything.

I grew up in the 60s with my sister. Our closest neighbor was our grandparents. There was a field between us and it took us 4 or 5 minutes to walk to their house. We had to cup our mouths and shout at the top of our lungs.... yoohooo....hello up there for them to hear us. But when sis and I were out playing in the back yard (which we were surrounded by woods) if we got noisy mom and dad would come out and tell us to knock it off. We got two chances. If we kept up screaming and yelling and fighting mom would be walking out faster than you can imagine with the strap in her hand. That sure quieted us down. Nevertheless we fought like any siblings but we were well controlled and we didn't go screeching at high pitched ear piercing screams. Also we lived in a time where if we were causing trouble in public strange adults we didn't know would tell us to keep it down...and we minded them.

What has happened to society where parents don't care what their kids do. They are too busy with their own lives that it makes me wonder why they even had kids in the first place. Then if you do say something you have the fear of them lashing back at you.

It also irritates me when neighbors have no consideration that their neighbors might like a little peace and quiet.

It's the Gen-X & Millenium's Kids - sm

[ In Reply To ..]
Somehow, they got it into their heads that they were raised all wrong, and consequently created a race of monsters, narcissistic little buggers who do no wrong. Not that I really have anything psychiatry per se (fo' sho I'm no Tom Cruise), but they somehow decided that everything about the way the Baby Boomers were raised was wrong. So they re-wrote the book on child rearing, education, and values.

Phonics was out, word recognition was in. Learning one's multiplication tables was out; New Math was in. Spankings were cruel; time-outs and 'reasoning' were in. Yelling at the kids was out; it damaged their little psyches. Punishment for bad grades was out; children needed to be nurtured for their effort. Getting cut from football, cheerleading, chorus was ruled out; everyone who wants should be able to participate. Parents who worked were made to feel guilty and overcompensated by seeing to all Junior's whims. TV went from the Cleavers to Family Guy, music from Donny Osmond to Brittney Spears, and our sports heroes from Roberto Clemente to Barry Bond.

Is it any wonder we've got a generation of little heathens on our hands? They're growing up watching the cheaters, liars, and stupid succeed, and have milquetoast parents who have never taught them the word no.

I cannot wait for that pendulum to swing back.

I agree, sort of.... - Kendra

[ In Reply To ..]
but I don't think it started with us as parents, I believe this whole mess started with our parents. My parents were strict and we had very clear rules, discipline and such, but many of my friends (I am 32, by the way), did not. My children behave and I will treat them the way my parents treated me, but many people my age did not have parents that raised them in the manner of which you speak. I blame it on progressivism, but that is just my opinion. The funniest thing, by far, in my eyes is the so-called unschooling where people allow their children to decide what is important to study. It apparently never occurred to these people that adults, perhaps, have lived a little longer and have a better idea of what is important to learn for the future. :)

I don't have patience for bad kids... - blondie

[ In Reply To ..]
If that was my little girl that little brat came over bothering I would go over and tell his mom or dad that if he did it again I was gonna whip his a$$. So if they didn't want his a$$ whipped by me then they better keep him under control and in his own yard. He sounds like he could use a good ole spankin.

That's ME - MarineMom

[ In Reply To ..]
You described me to a T Blondie! Momma don't play! About the time I saw that kid spraying the hose in the neighbors window, I would have walked straight around the corner to their front door and asked his mother if she knew what he was doing, and then informed her of what he was ACTUALLY doing, If she didn't believe me which she probably wouldn't (mother's of sons think THEIR sons do NO WRONG), I would have been happy to walk her next door to see the wet screen. Then I would commence to tell her.... oh by the way.... all the other crap I had witnessed this kid do, especially him and his friend fixin to come into MY backyard. Then, I would let her know that I am going to speak with the parents of the little girl next door when they return home, and the next time her kid pulls his crap, the cops will be called. End of Story.

But you better believe, the next time the kid started crap, I would take the list of stuff he's done along with the newest offense right around the corner to his mother.

I had a bunch of boys run through my yard the other day, hit my window and dump my ashtray in the yard (I only smoke outside). I ran out the door and they scattered, but not before I yelled, "next time I let my dog out, let's see if you can outrun him". I also informed the manager, that I will be doing that very same thing. I have a German Shephard/Lab mix that's almost as big as I am. He went up, caught the boys and all their parents got a call. I haven't seen them since.

My DH wouldn't want me to start trouble either (he avoids confrontation at all costs), but I'm one to tell it like it is and if you don't like it, tough.

You and blondie are my kind of people - help!

[ In Reply To ..]
It upsets DH about all the noise. We like to hear kids playing and having fun. That's one thing, but the bullying and picking on we cannot stand. I was beat up as a child in grammar school and DH was picked on horribly. If I wasn't married to DH I would do the same thing you did, but we've been "discussing" about what to say and not to say. He prefers to not say anything because of the type of parents they are (he hears their conversations in their back yard and says you don't even want to be messin with them).

Call the cops and report vandalism - Where are the parents of the girl?

[ In Reply To ..]
Why in the world are the parents of the girl not handling this? I'm shaking my head.

Seriously, though, next time you see the little sh!t doing something like the hose through the windows, report it as vandalism. It's what I'd do.

That's what I'd like to do, but.... - help!

[ In Reply To ..]
I've been told under no circumstances are we to get involved. Just the other day they started pulling everything out of their house and throwing it in their yard. If they ever ask DH he will tell them what he saw/sees, but we are not volunteering any info to them. He already told the kid once to knock it off (picking on the girl), and then a few days later yelled out that he told him once before to stop picking on her. The bully was back picking on her again yesterday, and I heard the father saying something, but was too mumbled for me to understand what. So we'll just wait and see if any more "fun" starts up.

bully - magsnfla

[ In Reply To ..]
Call the cops - spraying water on another human being who is staying stop is assault and spraying water into someone's open windows is vandalism. Call the cops, tell them it's a kid who has a pattern of doing this and ignoring adults who tell him to stop. They'll send out juvenils authorities.
As one of the other posters said, this is the result of Gen X parenting - permissiveness gone wild. Imagine what a joy this brat must be in school.

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