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Looks like ex isn't sending kids Christmas gifts

Posted: Dec 15, 2015

First Christmas since the divorce and I have the kids for the holidays. Ex isn't responding to my questions of what he's getting the kids for Christmas out of their list they created of requested items and blows me off when I ask him directly. He has a good job and money - so it's not as if he's lacking.

Funny thing is that while married he'd want to spend like crazy on Christmas gifts for them and now we're divorced he has become Mr. Jerk in that department. If he doesn't come through I'm going to make him explain to the kids why he doesn't get them at least something. I refrain from talking down about him to them but this will be hard as heck if he doesn't give them at least a little something. Fortunately I've got them some gifts for Christmas so they'll have things from me and Santa. I need prayer for patience!

;

Maybe he is getting them something - and feels he

[ In Reply To ..]
is not obligated to tell you what the gifts will be? I have an ex like that. Kids are grown, thankfully.

ditto - radmt

[ In Reply To ..]
Im thinking he is avoiding you. He has the list, wait and see. Worst case they get double of a gift or two. in that case, the kids can donate to someone in need.
I hope he's not that big of a jerk and buys nothing. That would suck.

My hub and his ex always used to share and combine monies to get the kids group presents.

Christmas gifts - katem

[ In Reply To ..]
As Judge Judy says, you're supposed to love your children more than you hate your ex. I hope you ex wakes up and realizes how important it is to have a good relationship with you AND your kids when they are with you. Good luck and Merry Christmas.

Well - My Take

[ In Reply To ..]
I think if you don't back off, he won't get them anything, so he can get back at you.

Stop being dysfunctional-sounds like you're annoying the living you-know-what out of him, and your kids don't need that.

It would be stupid and immature of him to neglect getting the kids something for Christmas because he's ticked off at you, but I think it would be stupid and immature of you to keep harping on it.

Let it go, and if the kids get duplicates, so be it. You can return something or donate the gift. Is it really worth all this energy?

I don't consider asking him twice.... - Disappointed

[ In Reply To ..]
since Thanksgiving as hounding him. The kids have no idea I have asked him about it as I don't let on to them that he hasn't bothered to respond. BUT if he doesn't give them anything I know they'll ask and I'll have them call him and ask him about it as I am not taking the heat for that. They gave us both the Christmas list of wishes and it'd be nice if he was getting something to let me know what. It's a 45 minute drive to the closest stores as we live in a small town and so returning stuff is a real hassle and could be avoided if he would just communicate.

UPDATE: Here's what happened... - Original poster

[ In Reply To ..]
He sent no gifts. Would not answer the phone when kids called him to wish him a Merry Christmas. On Saturday they called his brother to see if he had heard from him (youngest kid idea, not mine). Their uncle asked why they were asking and they told him that he didn't send them anything for Christmas and wasn't talking to them or answering the phone. The uncle called their dad and basically chewed him out, then the uncle felt so bad about his brother's behavior that he told them to go on line and pick out $50 worth of gifts each, send him the links and he'd pay for them himself and send them - in addition to the gifts the uncle had already sent for Christmas. The kids told him that he didn't have to do that but he kept insisting so they finally took him up on it. The uncle lives 9 hours away and said if he wasn't so far and didn't have to work Monday he'd have driven down to see them. He apologized for their dad acting like this.

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