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Why do I always feel fat?

Posted: Aug 20, 2013

Anybody else have a body complex where they ALWAYS feel fat, or is it just me? I would LOVE to be happy with my body, but I can't and it frustrates me. A few years ago I was a size 20 and I decided to make some lifestyle changes. My goal was a size 12 and ended up getting down to a size 6 and was ecstatic! I was happy with this for maybe a year or so, but then I started feeling "fat" again. I obsess over every single thing I eat, I stair at my naked body in the mirror, finding fat here or there (I'm 38 years old) and it is exhausting for me AND my husband. I decided to take off some more pounds and I started the Lose It Ap on my phone and had a goal weight of 25 pounds to lose. I am now down to a size 3/4, and my Lose It Ap started beeping the other day when I entered my weight saying Congratulations, I had met my goal weight and I seriously was like WHAT!? I am NOT happy yet, I THOUGHT 25 pounds would make me happy, but apparently not good enough. I changed the goal on there for 10 more pounds.

Does anyone else experience anything like this? I was heavy all of my life and never worried about it. I mean, I didn't like being overweight, but I never took steps. I DO lose weight healthily, eating right and exercising, I'm not doing anything unhealthy, but will there EVER be a time when I look in the mirror and say "Good Job" and stop all of the obsessing? I don't mind continuing the good foods and exercise, I realize that's a lifestyle and I'm used to it now, but I just want to stop caring what my weight is and stop caring to look in the mirror and find every single flaw, it's making me crazy!

;

Honestly, you sound a bit mental and may need some - sm

[ In Reply To ..]
counseling due to body image issues. If you truly went from a size 20 to a size 3/4 you have some excess skin hanging to be sure. Oh, and BTW, your weight shouldn't be the determining factor as to how "happy" your life is...

Body Dysmorphia Disorder - Nik

[ In Reply To ..]
As in everything there are varying degrees of severity, and the fact that you recognize you have a problem and want to correct it is good. Sounds like you meet the criteria for body dysmorphic disorder.

http://www.mayoclinic.com/health/body-dysmorphic-disorder/DS00559

I agree with the above poster who commented on excess skin. You may not look like you thought you would after your extreme weight loss and/or you may be comparing yourself to pictures in the media that are airbrushed and altered to make people look "perfect."

I don't have skin hanging - OP

[ In Reply To ..]
I did it in over a year with lifting weights/cardio and didn't have the excess skin hanging. That happens with people who lose weight quickly, like my dad who had gastric bypass surgery.

Yes. - sm

[ In Reply To ..]
I'm underweight. I look in the mirror and see flab. I always feel I could be a little bit thinner.

It's terrible. In the past, I've starved myself until I've lost consciousness.

I realize now that I will never feel like a thin person (I used to be overweight), no matter how emaciated I might get.

I hope you find peace with your body and I hope you are able to love yourself and see beauty in yourself.

OP, how tall are you and what do you weigh? - nm

[ In Reply To ..]
?

5'6 130 pounds - nm

[ In Reply To ..]
x

It sounds like an eating disorder - to me...

[ In Reply To ..]
eating disorders can happen at any time in one's life... look into anorexia or bulimia sites and get some counseling before this gets out of hand and you cannot stop. Self-image problems are addressed during this type of counseling, and you surely sound like you have contracted it. People die from this.. please do not become a statistic. good luck to you.

You are underweight for your height - sm - InkMT

[ In Reply To ..]
I know I am supposed to be 130 (at 5'3")....per GI doc I used to type notes for, he did bypass surgeries. So if you are 5'6" you should be heavier. Sounds like you are developing or developed some sort of body image disorder as suggested above. Granted non of us are doctors. I would not lose any more weight. Maybe try toning up, I am sure you look great at 130. You body is not going to look as good at 38 as an 18-y/o with a smoking hot body, not possible with gravity, aging, or physics, lol. If you keep going the way you are you will end up with a much bigger issue and never, never be happy. Talk to a professional therapist and figure it out before you are down to 80 pounds and dying.

I agree with the poster below about BDD - sm - me

[ In Reply To ..]
http://www.ocdla.com/bdd-test.html

Here is an online test for BDD. I had a friend who had it, he was so afraid he was going to look like his dad who had man-boobs and a big woman butt. He was soooo good looking he looked like the lead singer of the Village People in the video to In the Navy. He had been a little chubby maybe before I met him at about 230 or so and he was 6'2" then he had gotten down to 199 and I thought he looked really thin but he was still obsessing over it when I quit seeing him and he said he wanted to get down to 180. We had another friend who was 6'2" and 180 who looked like a concentration camp survivor and I told him that and he couldn't believe he would look that bad. I saw him again a few months after we quit seeing each other and he looked all white and ashy in his face and he looked so sickly and awful and I just looked at him and said "well I see you did it" because what else are you going to say "oh my God you look horrible you need to see a shrink!?" I actually talked to my therapist about him and she told me about BDD being a form of OCD. It's so sad, he was gorgeous. Wonder what he looks like now?

Anorexia nervosa possibly??? - True Fatty and OK with it.

[ In Reply To ..]
This condition usually afflicts teenage girls and IT CAN BE FATAL (research Karen Carpenter, she starved herself to death.) However, it can happen to adults. There is some fairly new research that suggests that the act of dieting itself can create this distorted perception of your body. I would encourage you to discuss these feelings with your physician and accept his (or her) recommendations, which will definitely include counselling and may include hospitalization. You sound like a sensible, very intelligent, woman who is quite aware that something is wrong.

I'm the same way - And I used to be fat

[ In Reply To ..]
I'm pretty small now too after a lifetime of being morbidly obese. I know that the body I have now I would have thought was not even possible when I was big, but I still am not happy with it.

You know how clothes today are made so randomly sized that sometimes I may wear a small and sometimes I could actually need an XL, just depending on the shirt type or whatever. Well, I know I SEE myself as bigger than I am, because I was in a store the other day and saw a very cute dress and wanted to try it on. I looked at them and thought they looked small for me and I chose the size large and went to try it on. I put it on and it was just falling off of me. I even came out and told my husband that obviously that dress was made small, because I was going to have to go with a small. It would seem that if a dress was big enough to fall off of me that I could have estimated that on the hanger, but in MY eyes I saw it as maybe being snug in the size large.

So, I do obsess as well, but I'm not unhealthy. As long as you remain healthy, then if it bothers you enough then maybe get some counseling. I still make sure I don't eat fattening things, I exercise normally, etc., so that's not going to hurt me or anything.

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