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Men and Money

Posted: Jan 5, 2012

As a single women nearing 50, and having MANY male friends, there is one observation that just MUST be made.

Men constantly complain that women are "only after (my) money," yet all of the men whom I know well who are even moderately "successful," whether married or single, have male friend(s) whom they fork money over to constantly. Usually these take the form of "loans" that are NEVER actually repaid.

I don't know if my married buddies tell their wives about these "loans" or not, but since it's a constant, ongoing thing I'll bet that the wives know about it or at least suspect it.

What's weird is that these "friends" will disappear for a while, then come back when they need help (money), and the lender KNOWS or strongly suspects he's being used by this "friend" but continues to fork over the money. Sometimes it's not actual cash in the hand but "gifts" like going out for meals (steak dinners!) or beer and the guy with the money picks up the tab. I joke with one friend that he needs to claim his "friend" as a dependent on his tax return.

This phenomenon is apparently fairly common, yet I have never, ever heard women talk about this.

What say ye?

;

My husband has absolutely no money sense. It is - scary. nm

[ In Reply To ..]
x

I say that is exactly why I handle the money now and DH gets allowance - nm

[ In Reply To ..]
x

My friend...female... - wheres_my_job

[ In Reply To ..]
She wore me down, bit by bit by bit...she is married to someone who works for a defense contractor, need I say more. Today she bought me lunch. I let her. I just can't battle all the time, it is a deluge of generosity. First I kept saying, "you are TOO generous" "you don't have to" "I've got it" "no, no, I've got it I've got it!!!" She cleaned out her closets recently, and give me about 20 (twenty, yes twenty!) beautiful journals (if I'm ever in a homeless shelter, I just have to buy pens, and I'm set).

What I do in return is make her art, and if she draws or paints something, I frame it and hang it on my wall (it brought tears to her eyes, the first time I put HER art on MY wall) (I used the gift card she gave me for ?? I can't even remember, to get her art framed.)

So women can be super generous (it's just lunch and a ton of gifts for holidays, and books (she has a ton of books) - but still. Now I say, "you are SO generous," instead of "you are TOO generous" - but she doesn't even like that.

Maybe we're the perfect friends for each other. I don't know. But she just bought me lunch today. I try to give cash to my broke friends when I can - $40 is a lot when you are broke.

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