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Hey, I just wanted to let all those below who gave me good advice that
Posted: Jan 24, 2014
two evenings ago, my daughter and I were having a pretty good time together and so I asked her what she would feel about going to a support group called Alateen. She asked me what it was and I told her its a group of kids who have an alcoholic parent or family member that they have to deal with. I told her we could go once and check it out and she doesn't have to talk, just watch and listen. She got real quiet and I said "what do you think?" She said "I think that's a good idea." So we are going to our first meeting next week.
I just felt like it was a little breakthrough for us. One step closer to her being less angry with me. :)
;
What a great start - shipwrecked
[ In Reply To ..]I'm so happy for you. I hope this is the beginning of a wonderful new life for you. I know it's just a start, but I'm proud of you!
Please keep us posted how it goes.
Excellent - Great Start-see msg
[ In Reply To ..]That is wonderful.
The goal, though, is not to have her not angry with you; the goal is for her to be well. If her becoming well means she can express anger towards you (in a controlled environment), then so be it. She does have a right to be angry with you for making a bad choice, then having to put her through the loss through your bad choice.
Your daughter is number 1 now and she should not have to take care of your anger; she needs to understand her own, of which is most entitled to. DO NOT make your child feel guilty for being angry with you. You will get nowhere with that. That would be putting her back to taking care of you (in a similar manner she had to with her father). She already had to take care of one parent, let's not make her have to take care of another. Okay?
Bless you for moving forward with this and let us know how it goes!
It's a great start, Noney,...SM - Old Anon
[ In Reply To ..]and I sincerely hope you will be start attending Alanon for yourself. I think having both of you in a program will work best. Things will be looking up before you know it.
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