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Working at home with a 3-year-old

Posted: Apr 19, 2013

I can no longer afford daycare for my 3-year-old daughter. I am literally working around-the-clock, usually waiting for work, just to pay bills. I am a single parent and have no one here to help watch her, so I need some ideas on what I can do to keep her busy while I work. I am feeling so guilty not playing with her all day or even just sitting down watching Dora with her! I feel like a bad mom. So far today she has watched some TV, colored, played with her toys, but it's only 11 a.m. and she is already bored. I've only got 340 lines in with all the interruptions. Any ideas how to make this work? Anyone been in this situation before?

Thanks

;

Play-Do lots of it - single mom2

[ In Reply To ..]
Our local library let us check out DVDs and we went every 3rd day or so to return and get new ones. I got lots of music videos like the Wiggles because my girl liked to dance, and I felt she was getting some exercise while she watched. Lots of Disney princess movies, too.

She loved Play-Do so I bought it by the boxes. You can sometimes find a bag of Play-Do tools at a thrift shop.

Get some beads large enough to not be swallowed and give her little boxes to sort them into. My girl is 9 and still loves to sort beads. Or give her an old magazine and kid-type scissors and let her cut out pictures, then she can paste them on a box or piece of cardboard, or even on printer paper.

You can set up a little sand box or water box for her to play in. Put down a shower liner (from the dollar store) and put a plastic box on top to fill with either sand or water. I went to Home Depot and got a good sized one for about $10. It was in the area where they sold cement (as a mixing tub). I didn't mind the mess from it being inside, just needed a quick vacuum touch up now and then. Throw in some toys and she will play for hours.

There was a Chuckee Cheese nearby so when weather was too hot or cold, we went there to do the crawling around activities. I made a point of taking an hour lunch to go to the pool with her or take her out somewhere. Of course like you, it took me all day to get in my lines. I worked around her naps and after she was down for the night. It helped I was an independent contractor and not an employee.

Before you know it, she will be 4 and able to do a lot on her own.

thought of another - single mom2

[ In Reply To ..]
If you are comfortable with it, instead of beads you can buy dried peas, beans or pasta to let her sort.

kids - INMT

[ In Reply To ..]
Don' beat yourself up with guilt. I also work and worked at home while my now 11 yo was an infant, toddler, and now entering the soon to be teen years. I said a statement to my father-in-law about how guilt I felt during the summer when she was home full time and I did not spend time with her...He SAID these words and I am amazed what a difference my guilt made. "If you were working outside the home, she would be in daycare full time, away from you. Do not feel bad that she plays, watches TV, or gets bored..She is still with you and you with her, that is more than a lot of families can say, take it at its true value and enjoy what you have" Hope this helps.

M

Well, you already know what she likes - sm

[ In Reply To ..]
The problem is your "guilt" of being chained to a computer and not able to spend any time with her. I was the SAME way. I actually started working from home in order to be there for my daughter, but I think in the long run it was just worse.

Where I lived, we had a HUGE living room and I had my desk set up in a corner of that. So, I actually placed an ad to babysit another kid when my daughter was 3 and I set them both up in the living room, where I was. I put a blanket down, lots of toys, t.v., etc. and they played together and kept each other company and I could keep an eye on them the entire time.

I did have the interruptions from not only one, but two kids in the house, but it did keep my daughter more occupied and I was able to babysit this other little girl until they both started school and now they are great friends. I even got extra income by getting paid to keep the extra child.

I guess it worked out okay in the end, but I understand your guilt and such dealing with this.

First of all, remember it is an adjustment.--sm - anon

[ In Reply To ..]
If a child is used to being entertained all the time, it will take time to learn to entertain itself. Could a schedule adjustment help, having at least some of your hours at a time when she is least likely to need you?

Another strategy would be to have a box of toys set up that are only for when mommy works. These can be lacers, pattern blocks, special coloring books, whatever. Look at an educational store for ideas (Rainbow Resource is online and they should have many manipulative type things to use).

Be prepared for the other needs too. Have snacks packaged/portioned at the beginning of the week. Have drinks alread poured in cups with lids where she can get it herself, or have a water bottle filled so she can take a sip as needed. I would also strictly enforce either a nap time or if your child does not take naps a quiet time in her room. To help with this, there are many stories done by professional narrators that you can have playing. Try Amazon and Rainbow Resource for those (Jim Weiss is fantastic). Song of the Unicorn is a favorite of mine too. Wee Sing has a lot of kid appropriate music. I homeschool a 15yo and 12yo and every afternoon from 12 to 2:30 they are to be in their rooms reading. During the summer, the 6 and 9 yo are likewise to be upstairs reading or doing something quietly in their rooms.

You will adjust and so will she and you will both be fine even if she does not get to spend every minute with you. I went back to transcribing when my second child was 1. The only one of them who was ever in daycare was the 3rd child and that was 2 days a week because he was autistic and needed the services. We managed some how and they are all 4 now growing up and are rather well adjusted. Good luck.

Have you tried 3rd shift? Maybe starting around - 6pm and working till

[ In Reply To ..]
2:30 am or 3 am? Seems works usually picks up in the evenings if you are doing acute care work (not clinic). That would give you all day with her, dinner time and bath time. Then sat her down with some cartoons, coloring book, toys or kid DVDs to watch while you get started working. Take a break around 9pm and put her to bed, get back on around 9:30pm and finish out your shift.

Since work picks up during those hours, you should'nt have the wait time, being without jobs.

and when would she sleep? - maybe she could...

[ In Reply To ..]
Work something like 4 to 9 am (5 hours), and then 1 to 4 pm (3 hours), and then she would be working the bulk of the shift before her child woke up, occupy the rest of the morning shift with cartoons and breakfast, then put her down for a nap at the start of the second shift.

Or even do the last 3 hours after hubby is home?

She could get in 6 hrs of sleep from 3am to 9am - and take a nap with 3yr old during the day...sm

[ In Reply To ..]
but your idea sounds good too. Either way, would probably work.

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