A community of 30,000 US Transcriptionist serving Medical Transcription Industry

12 year old boys - anyone have or had one? sm

Posted: Nov 3, 2009

I have a 12 year old son in the 7th grade. Yesterday he cried and almost missed his school bus because he was not happy with his hair and said there was no possible way he could go to school with his hair like that. It looked the same as it always does. I had to make him leave and go get on the bus and I felt awful having him leave upset.

This morning, it is about 40 degrees outside here, and he did not want to wear a jacket of any sort. He has about 10 hoodies that he used to wear every day (some of them I bought from a person who was selling them used, but nonetheless I spent good money on these). He wore them in weather when it was too hot but insisted he needed them so I let him wear them. Now that he actually needs one he is trying to refuse to wear them. He argued and cried this morning when I told him he had to wear one. It ended up with both of us about to cry this morning before he finally put the hoodie on to go to the bus stop, and once again left upset.

What in the world? I am not sure how to deal with this. In my mind it is just totally unreasonable things thare are upsetting him and I don't know what do to other than force him to go to school, upset or not.

Do all 12 year old boys act like this?

;

12yo boys - AW

[ In Reply To ..]
I think it depends on the kid. Boys are tough though. I have a 3yo girl and a 12yo boy and I swear it is like I have 3yo twins. He is so immature. I wish he would worry about his hair and clothes! LOL. 99% of the time I am forcing him to shower and brush his teeth and he cares nothing about his clothing or hair. I am at the stage where he is in middle school also and I am worried that this will start with the others teasing him and things like that and he just shrugs it off or gets angry or whatever. Also, we have a big, big problem with him listening..he will flat out act like he doesnt hear me until i am screaming away... Anyway, sorry so long, hope this helps a little that you are not the only one battling and lets me know I am not the only one too! I think this is definitely a tough age.

My 12yo boy is definitely the easiest of my 3 boys - momof3

[ In Reply To ..]
He is easier to deal with, I think, because he doesn't worry about his hair, clothes, brand names, etc. I think if you can get your son to open up to you, you might find out there is something else going on at school that is making him so moody about going to school.

I hated going to 7th grade. We didn't have a lot of money and I wore secondhand clothes, my mom cut my hair (she's not a stylist), and I was slightly overweight. Kids picked on me terribly and I would have stayed home everyday if my mom would have let me. I worry more about my kids socially than academically and I always try to make sure they're fairly well groomed (even the one that doesn't care) so the kids won't pick on him. Things will work themselves out. When I entered 10th grade, it was a whole new ballgame. I got a part-time job and was able to buy some clothes, get my hair styled and I lost a little weight. What a difference a good self-esteem makes. I was so much happier.

Try ordering in a pizza tonight and have a "rap" session. Your kid will probably think it's stupid, but if you can get him to open up, he'll probably feel a lot better about whatever is bothering him and so will you. My mom always downplayed my social guffaws and I really hated that. Try to be understanding and realize how important these issues are for him right now, even though they may seem trivial in the real world. Good luck!

12-year-old boys - gourdpainter

[ In Reply To ..]
One of my 12-year-old boys turned 44 today. The other was 40 in June. Both are fine upstanding men who work hard and both are now dealing with their own teenagers. Both say they are "payin' for their raisin'". LOL Your son will survive and you will too. This is a very frustrating age for both the child and the parent. My best advice is to let him "grow" and try not to make too much out of the wierd behavior. Of course insist that he go to school. If he misses the bus, as aggravating as it is, drive him to school. If he doesn't want to wear a hoodie, leave it alone. For one thing he is probably trying to establish his independence, which is a good thing. Try to not worry too much about the wierd behavior, it's the nature of the beasts (boys and girls). If it's any consulation, he'll be okay in the end. Unfortunately babies aren't born with instructions tattooed on their butts so as parents we can only do the best that we can.

12 is one of "those ages"....sigh. - Weirdo

[ In Reply To ..]
I remember when my son was 12, too, 14 years ago now. It was a time when he was changing dramatically and also wasn't letting me "in" as easily as he had before. Sometimes, talking between the two of us was fine, but other times definitely out. Guess who got to choose? :)

At 12, he went through several things at school that I didn't know about until some time later. At that age, he felt he was becoming a man, believe it or not, and felt some decisions were his to make, and he did just fine. At that age, we can't protect them like we did when they were younger. And, quite frankly, we shouldn't. They have to learn how to cope with things on their own and it seems this age is sort of a turning point for that.

Yours will do fine, too. Just be there when he wants to talk and he will.

I found for the two of us that working together outside, on the yard, on the pool, whatever, was when he opened up to me more easily during those dreaded teenage years, for some reason.

He's probably just trying to fit in with his peers - and not look "dorky". (sm)

[ In Reply To ..]
What may constitute "dorky" in the eyes of a bunch of 12-year-olds is probably completely different than you or I would consider "dorky". He's just trying to be cool, to fit in.

If it's upsetting him, maybe someone at school has been giving him a hard time about his appearance for some reason. I still remember being 12, and I often didn't "fit in". The other kids can be pretty cruel.

12-year-old boys - Frazzled

[ In Reply To ..]
Thanks for all the input everyone. Gourdpainter, I think you are probably right about the hoodie. I was angry because over the summer he found this older boy who was selling a lot of skateboard brand name clothes and he begged me to buy them. Now he does not want to wear them. He picked out new jeans from a very "cool" store at the beginning of the year and now wants more pants from that store, but does not like the style he bought and wants some totally different ones. He cares about his hair and the way his clothes look, but I still have to make him brush his teeth and take a shower! lol

Do we have the same son?!!? - lrlrlady

[ In Reply To ..]
I had to laugh when I read that and feel better knowing mine is like that too. He will not let me cut his hair!!!! I like the real short look with a nice style but he wants it to grow. He did say I could cut it after football season so thank goodness for that. Yes, I know I could force him and have him hate me and cut it but it is such a small thing in the big picture. Other than that and worrying about his clothes, he is really a great kid. I could have worse things than long hair. Plus, he just told me he loved me yesterday just for making him soup.

12-year-old boys - been-there

[ In Reply To ..]
I once had a 12-year-old boy, too. I think that's about the age where children start to become adults (or so they think), have a lot of hormone shifts and want to be independent. My son and I argued like brother and sister from that age until probably age 18, but it was worse in the early teenage years. We were constantly butting heads. He had to have certain styles and brands of clothing (until he got out of school and started buying them himself). When he was in 6th grade (12 years old), he didn't want to go to school and I ended up in the guidance counselor's office with him, and we found out that he was afraid I was going to die. Looking back, I think it was because his grandfather had passed away about 2 years earlier while my son was at school. Anyway, my son is now 24 years old, still lives with us and we get along great. He turned out okay and we both lived through it and you will too.

my friend, as a mom of an 18-year-old, who went ...sm - Cyndiee

[ In Reply To ..]
Through the same exact situations at the same age, and also a boy who has just turned 12 and has not yet started this, but is getting much more picky about his clothing, etc, I can tell you this is the most awkward age for boys. Lots of peer pressure, they are just starting to notice girls and the "pecking order" at school, and their hormones are working overtime. All you can do is take lots of deep breaths, give them good advice, and keep repeating to yourelf "this too shall pass," because it does get better on the other side. Very stressful, emotional time, love him through it and it will get better, I promise!

12 yo - andi

[ In Reply To ..]
Just wanted you to know you are not alone. My son does the same thing. We were once very close and now he thinks it is a sin to be seen with me. Also, could your son have a mild case of OCD brought out with extreme amounts of stress(in a 12 yos mind)? My son is OCD and when he stresses he will be anal about what he wears or he is constantly thinking that he has pet hair all over him. The key is to let them feel in control over something. When my son was diagnosed OCD the doctor explained it this way maybe it will help a little for you. Put your concern in one of these 3 catagories Think of 3 baskets, 1--will it hurt him or others? 2----Could hurt and/or harm oneself. 3-----Is dangerous and should not be done. So see this will help you pick your battles.

Hope this helps, best wishes for a warm holiday season. andi

oh yeah...just wait...Mark Twain said...sm - flybye

[ In Reply To ..]
On the topic of raising teenagers, Mark Twain advised, â��When a boy turns 13, put him in a barrel and feed him through a knot hole. When he turns 16, plug up the hole.â��

boys...a barrel full of monkeys...

=) hang in there!

12 year old boys - nn

[ In Reply To ..]
I raised two sons...from 12 until 18 it can be trying...remember, they can be self conscious, sometimes worse than girls. Peer pressure can also be very cruel, and so want to fit in. We lived through it! Oldest will be 40 this month, and is a Lt. in the USN. The younger will be 38 in Feb., and is a First Sgt. in the USMC...both have been overseas more than once, but they matured, the succeeded in life, just be there for them with encouragement, advice, etc., even if they think you're all wet! All the best to you.

Similar Messages:

Mar 16, 2010
My niece and nephew's 8 year old birthday is this week. They are twins. I want to get my niece a Barbie DVD but have no idea what an 8 year old would like regarding DVDs. Any suggestions? ...

May 01, 2013
"A 2-year-old Kentucky girl was accidentally killed by her 5-year-old brother who fired a rifle he had been given as a gift, officials said Wednesday." Parents can be arrested for not reporting a missing child. It's not even legal to let your child drive a car without a permit. Yet, this sad, sad story is unfortunately way too common. We MUST start holding adults accountable for guns in the home. ...

Feb 28, 2014
If you knew FOR A FACT that Obama misled the American people on what happened in Benghazi just so he could win an election, would you take him down off his pedestal, or would you still bow at his feet? Serious question with a little sarc thrown in. ...

Dec 31, 2014
A well-deserved reprimand with their recent behavior. http://mobile.nytimes.com/2014/12/30/opinion/police-respect-squandered-in-attacks-on-de-blasio.html?referrer=&_r=1 ...

Jan 16, 2013
It's a sad, sad day when kids aren't allowed to play. Really, really getting out of control. Such stupid reactions. The poor kids of today can't have any fun or play any kind of game anymore. No wonder they are always playing video games and/or watching TV. Nothing else for them to do! Then our politicians want kids to play for exercise instead of the video games or TV. They're trying to ban guns and ammo (2nd Amendment) but won't do a darn thing about VIOLEN ...

Jul 07, 2016
who I have allowed to start dating. In middle school, she would go to the movies or out to dinner with a boy with his family. I would send money with her, but usally the boy's parents paid for everything. Starting this summer, she has been allowed to car date. She's not serious about one particular boy, but has been asked out on a few dates, but three different guys. Only one of them paid for the date! With the other two, she's had to pay for he ...

Oct 06, 2015
yeah, you guessed it: Muhammad. http://www.babycentre.co.uk/a25011625/top-baby-boy-names-2014 ...

Mar 30, 2011
I guess he has to drive a used minivan to his second home. Another Wisconsin Republican that is out of touch. See link. ...

Jan 01, 2011
Another year has come and gone. We ended up going to the movies to see the Little Fockers. It was pretty funny. We went to the grocery store beforehand to pick up some snacks for today and then grabbed dinner at a fast food place the kids picked. Overall, it was a pretty good evening. I went to bed about 11:30 (I tried but could not stay awake), but the kids stayed up till a little after 12 with DH. After that, they went off to bed. I'm actually looking ...

Jan 01, 2015
I'm the parent of a toddler, no other kids. I'm 42 and she just turned 3. My husband is at home too, but he is disabled from physical issues as well as mental ones. I was a stay-at-home transcriptionist way before I became a mother and I am overwhelmed with it all. My husband is there for us maybe 50% of the time, which just isn't cutting it. He is my only source of support, as we have no family, no friends (thank you isolating career move), and we ju ...

Feb 08, 2012
Can be serious or hysterical.... ...

Jan 12, 2011
VR - got my first really good one today - dictated: dysphonia with a high pitched voice. VR: dysphonia with a 'high fish' voice. Glad I'm getting off soon. At least worth a smile, or laugh....... ...

Feb 05, 2010
Unreal. If she keeps the baby, when she is graduating high school, her daughter will be in the 1st or 2nd grade. Very sad, IMO. ...

May 25, 2010
I'm out of ideas for end of year gifts for teachers. My son will be "graduating" 5th grade Thursday and he's had kind of a rough year. I'd like to get his teacher something out of the ordinary. I usually do gift cards, but anyone out there have any better, more unique ideas? I don't want to spend lots of money, maybe $20 or so...Thanks y'all! ...

Aug 12, 2012
Lie of the Year 2011: 'Republicans voted to end Medicare' http://www.politifact.com/truth-o-meter/article/2011/dec/20/lie-year-democrats-claims-republicans-voted-end-me/ ...

Dec 26, 2013
Anyone have any specific traditions they do New Year's Eve or NY Day? Both of those days vary for us as we've gotten older. NY Eve we USED to do it up big, get all duded up, go to a banquet hall, dance, ring in the New Year with Champagne, leave after midnight. These days, we just go out for a quiet dinner with friends, or do a little thing at someone's house. Staying up until after midnight is optional for us these days, but we've been doing pretty good ringing it in. ...

Feb 13, 2014
Yeah, it's my mother. Maybe that says it all. She has told me she wishes she could change how she and my father parented my brothers and me when we were growing up. In the 60s and 70s nobody really thought about how to parent. They just did it, good and bad, so I'm dealing with the fallout of their choices just like every other person alive. I think we've had the normal ups and downs, although my mother has been and continues to be a very critical, judgmental person, not jus ...

Mar 30, 2015
A friend of ours, 15-year-old Alex Pearson from Nashville, TN, suffered an ruptured aneurysm after a rare slow brain bleed (about 3 weeks) on March 18th. He has undergone craniotomy to stop the bleed, and has had most of his skull removed on both sides b/c of brain swelling. He was brought out of his coma last week and after three hours of no brain function and being told he was brain dead, his mother and brothers and sisters left the hospital and headed to church to pray with the youth group ...

Mar 11, 2016
Okay, so I got out of MT 3 years ago (for obvious reasons), took a nice little part time job answering telephones for a mom & pop business. I plan on retiring completely in one year, and am trying to get ideas on what you plan on doing (or are doing) in retirement. Or, heck, even if you have many years ahead of you in terms of needing to work-work, I'm open to ideas. I am thinking of volunteer work. I do know that I don't want to sit around and watch movies all day. I'm th ...

Apr 01, 2011
Petition to Barack Hussein Obama for a Proclamation of Apology for the Democratic Party's 150-year History of RacismWe, black American citizens of the United States and the National Black Republican Association, declare and assert:WHEREAS, the healing of wounds begins with an apology, and the Democratic Party has never apologized for their horrific atrocities and racist practices against black Americans during the past 150 years, nor held accountable for the residual impact that those atroc ...

Nov 11, 2009
In December, my significant other (BF sounds so young) and I will have been together 10 years. We are both 51 and basically get anything we want when we want it. He is not the type to wear jewelry except his college ring and a watch (which I got him 5 years ago) and he has anything and everything for his favorite college team. I was thinking about doing a collage of pictures from the trips we have taken in our 10 years together in a nice picture frame, but not sure. He is ...

Dec 31, 2009
See ya next year....and hopefully it will be better all the way around. I splurged even though I shouldn't have, but those 1 pound giant lobsters looked too good to let anyone else have them. Now I'm going to enjoy. ...

Jan 06, 2011
My 9 year old wears a ladies size 8-1/2 shoe. She's wanting to get high heels (she showed me her example at Wal-Mart, a heel of around 3-4") and says her school friends are wearing heels. I'm not sure that heels are a good idea at this age of this height. What's your thoughts? ...

Jan 13, 2010
I say every year I am not going to be caught up in the moment and here I go again. Last night's show was really good as far as the talent and tonight is turning out to be some of the same. What was the guy's name, Tyler, last night that sang "Let's Get it On", oh my, my! Guess I am hooked again. ...

Jan 22, 2010
My 12 year old son just asked me if he could sleep over at a friend's house tonight at a boy's house, with 4 other kids. I asked him who the kids were.... three of them (including my son) would be boys, and two girls! I said no. He is very upset and says it is no big deal. Would you have let your child go? ...

Nov 01, 2011
I've tried everything to get my 2-year-old daughter to brush her teeth. I've put her in front of a mirror and brushed my teeth and tried to get her to copy me but she wouldn't. I've tried making it a fun game and that didn't work. I've told her she has bugs in her mouth that need to be brushed out and that didn't work. I let her pick out a toothbrush at the store that she liked and that didn't work. Her teeth need to be ...

Jun 10, 2010
Okay, so the parents think this child knows what she is doing so they let her sail around the sea, BY HERSELF???? What is good gawd's name is going on in this world. The girl is a child for pete's sake. She hasn't even graduated high school, not onld enough to drink, just old enough to have her drivers licence and they let her go out to see all alone??? Trusting your child is one thing. We're talking about the ocean where even the most experience ...

Jun 10, 2012
Anyone have any good ideas for teachers gifts? I was thinking of gift cards, but am always so unsure of how much to put on them. My 1 son has 1 teacher and 3 assistants in his rooom throughout the week (1 full time and 2 part time helpers), so I would need to buy for all 4 of them. My little guy has 1 teacher and 1 assistant in preschool, so I would need for them too. Also my big guy has a bus driver and an assistant so I want to get them a little something as well. Any help or s ...

Aug 23, 2012
Obama has sunken us deeper. But that is what he wants. He wants us to be like a third world country. He says the majority of people in third world countries are worse off than the poor in this country. He wants "equality for all". Damn Communist. ...

Sep 05, 2012
It's like an echo. Every single person who speaks or gave a speech, and every government mayor, governor, government worker who speaks or gave a speech, are saying the exact same thing. Don't they have thoughts of their own? Can't they think for themselves? It certainly doesn't look that way. I'm surprised the women are being bamboozled so badly. It's shocking. Oh, and I love the way Debbie Wasserman-Schultz got caught in another lie and then lied about it... ...