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Does anyone else have a difficult time keeping up with cleaning and other household chores while wor

Posted: Jan 10, 2015

I find that when I'm working at home, my time is spent mostly trying to get my lines in, and I don't have a whole lot of time left, and I get behind on my cleaning and other household chores. My days off are often spent trying to catch up. I have three children (10 and twins 7). The oldest one tries to help a lot, but the other two not so much. I have to find a way to get them more involved in helping. I also have a sick husband who is at the point where he isn't able to help with the cleaning at all.

Any tips on how to become more organized woudl be greatly appreciated. It's very frustrating because I want so much to be organized and to have a sparkling clean home! : ) Thanks in advance for any help!

;

I feel I don't have enough time in the day ever... - MessyOne

[ In Reply To ..]
I'd like to also add that I am the only one who can do our errands, grocery shopping, take the kids places, get the kids ready and off to school, be there when they get off the bus, etc.

CLEAN HOUSE - Muzzy

[ In Reply To ..]
Please, Wonder Woman, be reasonable. Three kids make a mess by just existing, so you can clean house after they grow up and leave home - don't make the focus of your kid's lives keeping the house sparkling. They can help and need to be taught the value of chores. I had someone clean for me every two weeks for years, but could do the other household chores myself. Good family meals, relatively clean kitchen/bathroom, laundry done within a week of clothes entering that realm, etc., sounds good to me. Not having to "deep clean" saves time and still keeps your house reasonably sparkling. Cut yourself some slack, have some fun with your kids, and pay someone every two weeks or so to do the heavy cleaning.

Love the advice but... - MessyOne

[ In Reply To ..]
I could never afford to pay someone to clean while working this job (planning to change careers though). I do make time for my children, but other than work, doing things with them, and running errands, I don't have much time to keep up with the regular household cleaning. I think the solution is to get out of this kind of work.

If you worked at a so called regular job, that is - working outside the home, then what

[ In Reply To ..]
would you do? I work my hours and never take time to do anything else while working. I, like Muzzy above, have someone to come in every other week and do not only the cleaning but they do my washing as well. I think what has happened in this profession people do not treat it like a regular job which it should be. I will say this, you probably have more time to actually do housework if that is a big bother to you because you do not have to commute like, shall I say people with a regular job?

I have had outside temporary jobs since - Getting out of MT

[ In Reply To ..]
working at home. One I was hoping would become permanent, but they decided to close the whole medical transcription department at the hospital. The other was a data entry job to help switch the patient database for a clinic. They only needed help for that. During this time, it was much easier to keep up with everything else at home. My time at home was all free time, and I loved it.

I wish I could just work my hours as well, but - GoodbyeTranscription

[ In Reply To ..]
my hours are very scattered because there is often a work shortage. I have three accounts. I do realize I need to get out of this kind of work altogether. I can't bring myself to apply for another at-home company that just might have more work to offer. I am tired of being paid 0.03 to 0.06 per line for editing (which in this case means typing everything over) when I have almost 20 years of experience. I will change my situation, but it just sometimes helps to talk about it.

To Messy One - sm

[ In Reply To ..]
I agree with the other poster -- lighten up on yourself. With three kids and a husband who can't help you, you won't have a sparkling clean house (especially if you have pets). That's not such a bad thing, but I understand as I am a clean freak. When I worked from home, I found it very easy to keep up with my chores because I had an extra three hours a day as I didn't spend an hour getting ready for work and two hours on traffic. When I no longer worked from home, I was in the situation you are in; I couldn't stand my messy house. So, for me, I decided to work part time. I realize not everybody has that option, and that's not what I'm suggesting. I'm just saying that's what I had to do to keep my sanity and my house clean.

I think it's hard when women feel we don't - have our homes in order

[ In Reply To ..]
and it really eats away at us. You are very stretched as far as your responsibilities and really acting as a single parent with your husband sick, I wouldn't sweat having it all together. There will be a time and season in your life when your house is clean and things are running smoother. It's just a season and it won't last forever that things are like this.

Try to accept the fact this is what life looks like now and don't put so much pressure on yourself that it isn't what you really want. The time will come. Just focus on the absolute necessities and get through each day the best you can.

Don't be too hard on yourself, you're doing great working, taking care of the kids, your husband, and all the errands. You are doing amazing it seems!!

Thank you for the kind words, sm - MessyOne

[ In Reply To ..]
I just often feel like I'm fighting a losing cleaning battle. When I have so much left undone, it is difficult. I always feel like I have this huge amount of cleaning and stuff to do hanging over my head. I just need a way to get things in order to the point where it can be easily maintained. With all of the ideas here, I think I'm on my way to getting to that point :)

Clean freak here - clyde

[ In Reply To ..]
Yes, I am a clean freak. Yes, keeping you family happy should be your #1 priority. That being said, here's how I do it.

1. Every night before bed, I "pick up" the house. The dishes are done, and there aren't random shoes and articles of clothing in the living room. I don't do this alone, though. Just before the kids get into the shower/bath, I take a quick survey of the house and ask everyone to pitch in. Johnny, please put your shoes in your room. Cindy, could you put all the dirty dishes in the kitchen, please? While they're bathing, I'm doing the dishes and wiping off the countertops. An hour later, everyone's hair brushed and PJs on, with everyone responsible for taking their mess out of the living room/dining room/kitchen, it's time for bed. (I honestly can't sleep if I know I have a sink full of dishes.)
2. Once a week, on Friday nights, I clean the house. My family knows by now to just stay out of my way. I start in my bedroom and bathroom (family in the living room), and by the time I've finished the kitchen they all know to be somewhere else. It takes much longer to clean if I have to dodge people or ask them to move. This may seem strict, but I get the house "sparkling clean" in 2 to 2-1/2 hours. Then, we all settle down together in the living room and watch a movie.
3. My kids are responsible for their own bedrooms (and bathrooms if they have their own). I couldn't care less what they look like during the week. If Johnny wants to take his shoes from the living room and dump them right in the middle of his bedroom floor...no problem! But Friday before movie time their rooms need to be clean, dusted, vacuumed, beds made, clean clothes put away and their bathrooms clean.
4. I allow myself (and my family some slack). When someone's sick, we skip the cleaning and just continue to keep things picked up. If one of my kids says, "Mommy, can we not clean tonight?" I have no problem skipping a week to spend with them instead.

Anyway, you asked how I do it, and this is what works for me and my family. When my kids were really little, I waited until after they went to bed to clean. Once they were about 8 or so we started the clean and then watch a movie thing. Quite often, I'll have a kid who doesn't want to clean their room. I make a game out of it. "Wow! It's like a cyclone hit in here. If we had a fire, the firefighters would break a leg trying to get to you! Your sister's room is worse, though. I bet you can't get your room clean before she gets her room clean! And before you know it, they're fighting over who gets to use to the vacuum first (because the vacuuming is the last thing they do before they declare their rooms "clean").

Oh, and I never, ever look under beds or in closets. If my kids stash all their stuff there, it's their responsibility to find it when they need it. Usually once or twice a year (just before we go shopping for new clothes) I make them clean out their closets, drawers and under their beds so we can figure out what still fits and what needs to be replaced. They have to bring me the clothes that need to be replaced, so it's in their best interests to clean out all those areas because they can't bring me 2 pairs of jeans and tell me that they actually need to replace 5 pairs of jeans.

Love your ideas : ) - MessyOne

[ In Reply To ..]
The movie night idea sounds great. I love watching movies with the kids. In fact other than my Hugh Grant movies, I prefer to watch family movies. :) My daughter often picks on me about not liking more grownup stuff when I watch movies on my own, but it's what I prefer. I stopped watching scary or horror movies years ago when I lived alone. Anyway, getting off track. Great advice, and I love the idea of having them make sure everything is clean in their rooms at the end of the week and kind of making a game out of it : ) Anything to make cleaning seem more fun sounds great to me and should work for the kids! :)

Prioritize and train - anon

[ In Reply To ..]
I have 4 kids. First thing I had to do was figure what is important to me to have clean and what I am willing to let go. Since my kids are no longer crawling, the floor does not have to be clean enough to eat off of. You figure out what your choices are.

Some other ideas:
1. 10 and 7 are good ages for training kids to help. Can they unload the dishwasher, or at least part of it. Can they load parts? My younger 2 unload the plastic stuff or kid related stuff. They do not always do the jobs as well as I would but chances are, there are some jobs I would not get to.

2. Have the kids and anyone else develop routines to rein in any mess. Dishes stacked in one place, backpacks go to their place after school, where do school papers go? etc.

3. When life is overwhelming, I like to have set days for doing certain chores. I figure out how to get laundry done during the week because I refuse to do laundry on the weekend. Vacuuming the downstairs happens on Tuesdays, if I do not get to it Tuesday, then I give myself permission to wait until the next Tuesday unless there is something especially egregious. Seven year olds can fold their own laundry and put it away and they can sort dirty laundry too. A ten year old can be in charge of their own laundry. I used to give my oldest a nickel for every pair of socks he mated of his younger siblings. He got something he wanted and I got the socks mated. Now he does his brother's laundry to earn extra computer time. Again, a win-win for me.

4. A big help is the rule of if you make a mess, you clean it up. If a kid spills something in this house, they know where to find the rags to clean up their own mess. They also know where the broom, dustpan and vacuum cleaners are and how to use them.

About this time each year, I go to the library for books on organization, cleaning, etc. I almost always find some idea or 2 to apply to my situation. This just happens to be the time of year I am more inclined to read them. Come gardening season, I have even less motivation to clean.

Try some quick 15 minute pick ups--sm - anon

[ In Reply To ..]
While cooking dinner you can have the kids do a 15 minute pick up in the living room or where-ever. This has worked for us because the task seems less daunting because after 15 minutes, we knew we were done. Limits help.

So much awesome advice to put into action! - MessyOne

[ In Reply To ..]
Thank you all so much for these ideas! :) Sunday and Monday are the days I choose to take completely off (no real set schedule for the company I work for), so I am going to work on getting the kids more involved today! Hopefully by Tuesday the house will be at a point where we will just have to do regular maintenance cleaning. Thank you all again so much for the great ideas! :)

great advice - Not a mom

[ In Reply To ..]
Not a mom yet, but great advice!

I love my lived in, warm, cozy messy home - much more to life than sparkling floors!

[ In Reply To ..]
xxoo

Of course there is but for some of us--sm - anon

[ In Reply To ..]
it is a luxury to walk into the kitchen to make dinner without having to clean pans to use that night. It is soooo much easier and relaxing for me to cook dinner in a kitchen with some clear counterspace and without having to wash things first.

Sometimes messy is cozy and sometimes, messy can add to stress levels. I still have not found the right balance for me and my life but I hope to get there one day.

I didn't say I was a slob, just meant things ain't perfect - and thats ok by me

[ In Reply To ..]
xxoo

i know what you mean - same here

[ In Reply To ..]
nm

I agree that there is much more to life, but - MessyOne

[ In Reply To ..]
my messy home has been a source of stress for me, and it's like it's always hanging over my head that I have all of this stuff to do. I am taking off an extra day this week to try to completely finish every room in the house, so then we will just have maintenance cleaning. I will also use these wonderful ideas here to get the kids more involved. : ) Thanks everyone for your advice! : )

Teamwork - Mary

[ In Reply To ..]
Hubby and I raised three daughters. From the time they were 3 or 4 years old, we taught each of them how to do ability-appropriate tasks, and upped their chores as they grew older. By the time they were grown up, they knew how to and had been doing everything. We worked together as a team and tried to make it as fun as possible. We had a chore chart, which they hated, but the visual aspect of the chart helped keep us on track. We had chores every day, but here's another example: Everyone cleaned the house on Saturday morning, and then we would go out and do something fun for the rest of the day and come home to a clean home. The biggest issue was this: The kids did not have a choice; they HAD to do what they were told. No other options. No negotiations. No "I'm not doing it" and then punishment. Nope. You live here, you're a part of our family, Daddy and I are the coaches, and you all are the players. We work together. Also, we gave them allowance each week according to their age. At age 3, they got $3 to put in their "banks." Age 10, $10. And we taught them how to save, spend, budget, etc. There was no "Well, I won't do my chores, I don't care about the money." The money was not "pay" for work done. They had to do the work. We always paid them their allowance. It was a lot of hard work, and they complained on a regular basis, but they still had to do the work. And, my girls are great housekeepers, budgeters, etc., and work full time. I don't mean to brag, because I think we also got really lucky. Please forgive me if I rubbed anyone's feathers the wrong way. Everyone's home runs differently.

This sounds awesome! :) - MessyOne

[ In Reply To ..]
What a great way to work together and keep things fun. I've been wanting to do something similar for a while now with the chore chart. At 7 and 10, I feel they can all help with most things. They have been helping me with shoveling lately as well. We have been shoveling the our street and the one on the same block across from us.

Something I've been thinking of doing regarding allowance is giving the allowance all in quarters, and if they have bad behavior (not sharing, arguing, etc.), I've thought of having a separate bank where they have to pay in a quarter each time.

Correction.... - MessyOne

[ In Reply To ..]
I guess I should be better about proofreading here :) I meant to say we've been shoveling our side of the street and the street across from us.

We did a variation of this with poker chips - clyde

[ In Reply To ..]
First, we wrote down all the rules of the house and posted them in the office. We wrote the rules first, and then the kids added rules to it after we were done, so it was a team effort. Everyone had to obey the rules, even Mommy and Daddy.

Next, I bought some cheap glass see-through containers with lids, one for each member of our family, and wrote a name on each.

Each member of the family had their own color poker chip (so nobody could take chips from one container and put it in another).

For every good deed that was done, they could earn more poker chips. For instance, helping your sister make her bed would be 1 poker chip. Helping the neighbor shovel his driveway was 3 poker chips. Each poker chip had a monetary value. For us, each chip was a quarter.

By the same token, you do something bad, you lose a poker chip. Fighting with your sister, lose a poker chip. Lying to a parent, lose 5 poker chips.

The kids also had a list of things they wanted as rewards for poker chips. Things like going out for ice cream would cost 10 poker chips. Having a sleepover with 5 friends would be 50 poker chips. Having a parent do your chores for a week was 100 poker chips. Or, they could also cash in their poker chips for cash after they got 100 in their jar.

It worked great! And they especially liked that Mom and Dad had to obey the rules too. There were many lazy days when I was "caught" with an unmade bed and had to give up 2 poker chips to my kids (who loved to call me out on this one!).

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