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Could you some advice/encouragement


Posted: May 22, 2015

Hi ~ I could really use some advice and/or encouragement.  I have been a medical transcriptionist for 20 years, working at home for a little more than half of that time.  I have always been a shy, quiet person, but I do my best to smile and try to be friendly and always try to be kind to everyone.  Today I went to an appointment about a class I'll be taking soon.  While waiting for my turn, all of the new students had to sit together in these chairs along the wall. When I walked in I felt they were giving me mean looks, and none of them were friendly to me.  My husband thinks I might be exaggerating, but I can tell when someone is giving me mean looks.  I smiled and would have said hello to them had they been friendly.  There was one other meeting for this class, and one of the women was friendly to me, but she wasn't there today.  She seemed nice, and I actually started the conversation with her.  Today one of them sat down and quite obviously turned to the side so her back was to me the whole time.  I don't feel I am imagining things, I feel they were leaving me out on purpose.  I've never been very girly, into makeup, clothes, hair, etc., and I feel people discriminate against me a lot because of this. The people sitting there were wearing nice clothes, had their hair perfect, etc.  To be honest even if I wanted perfect hair and clothes right now, I could not afford to get either done which is why I'm getting out of medical transcription.  

I guess my point is that I have been nervous about starting a new life outside of transcription, and seeing these people and having it feel like how I was treated in high school all over again really has me nervous and worried about this working out.  I know I would be a good student, I always have been, but I was bullied out of high school and just went to a technical school for half of the day which is where I picked up transcription.  I think part of the reason my teacher suggested transcription for me is because I was so shy.

Anyway, any advice or words of encouragement would be greatly appreciated. I am feeling sick with worry about being in this class now that I have seen my classmates.  Thank you in advance!

;

What I Think - Meh

[ In Reply To ..]
I also tend to see things the way you do, since I also have social anxiety (which has always been the case with me, since I too am a shy, quiet person by nature who tends to feel excluded). Rationally, however, I really doubt that others in the classroom (except the 1 person you mention) are purposely hostile towards you, since they don't know you and you've done nothing to offend them--just because you aren't the most well-dressed or well-coiffed or appear frumpy. However, if you smell or have the aura of having walked off the streets,in other words, as if you are wearing perfume la homelessness, then I would believe you, or if your breath were really bad. Otherwise, if rejection from these strangers are true,I don't believe it's because of how you physically look or what you're wearing--unless your clothes are really dirty. I'm guessing you probably have some hostile air or vibration going on yourself in which they are picking up on which is a turn-off to them. People generally don't want to associate with hostile people (and shy people including myself can inadvertently be defined as hostile at times). As Dr. Phil says, "You teach people how to treat you." So whenever the feeling of exclusion comes over me, I remember to think how I am contributing to how I'm treated, usually something about my body language or not speaking up.

I don't think it's a hostile air - see msg. - Ladee

[ In Reply To ..]
I also have a good case of social anxiety and have found myself in the same situation when in public. I can only speak for myself, but because of my social anxiety, I can be a bit closed off and don't always make eye contact. It could be that others see me as standoffish and they react to that. Social anxiety is a beast and tough to deal with.

advice - all smiles

[ In Reply To ..]
Your perception might be right on, depending on the age of the group you are in and whether they are female/male.

Younger ages (20-35) have lost all manners, they are me, me, me, and me. Very competitive, and so the reaction you might perceive is some of the vibes they are sending to cut down on the competition or just get you to quit.

They know they might not get a job or might not get the job they want because there are so many people out there and so few jobs.

My suggestion: Be yourself, be polite, add to the conversation, etc. when you have something to say. These people are not worth sweating over, losing sleep over, or losing self-esteem.

They are in a tough boat, so they may very well be hostile, irritable, and really shutting people out.

Bottom line: It's not you.
Thank you for the advice :) - hopeful
[ In Reply To ..]
I agree with all of the messages here. I guess I just needed to hear other opinions about why I might be so nervous. I am 36, and I'm sorry to say it, but I agree with you about a majority of the "younger" generation. I have a sister who is six years younger than me, and it just seems like a lot of the younger people have different attitudes about everything. It's sad that we live in a society that often places so much value on looks. I don't think I'm an ugly person, I've been complimented, usually by older people, about my smile and eyes. I try to look neat and clean with clean clothes, but I could use a new wardrobe after working at home for so long. lol I think I am letting my nerves get to me, and I just need to relax and think about why I am there, to get a better job for our family, and to have a job where I feel like I'm making a positive difference in the lives of others. It isn't a one person office job that I'm training for, I feel I need to get away from that atmosphere even though I'm shy. I will be working with and around a lot of people all day. Thank you all for your kind words and advice. I will keep all of this in mind, and I will keep you guys updated. :) You have all really helped me put things in perspective, thanks again! :)
Another reason I'm nervous... - hopeful
[ In Reply To ..]
I did well in school, but I was always picked on and excluded, and I think to this day, it still affects the way I feel about school (one reason I've taken so long to go to school and get out of MT). I know high school is almost 20 years behind me. I just have to focus on why I am there. In a perfect world, people wouldn't be judged on appearances. My main bully back then was a guy whose parents were teachers. My grades were better than his, and I think he was really bothered by that. I started skipping high school to escape the bullying, and I only went to technical school for half of the day where I learned transcription. The bullying wasn't as bad there as I was basically on my own in the office technology program. Anyway, I just have to focus on what matters. I agree with the poster who said they wouldn't want to be friends with someone who is going to judge based on appearance. I am also there for a class and a job. It's not high school. I also didn't mean to be negative about the younger generation in my earlier post. I also know a lot of wonderful people who are younger. I didn't mean to say they are all like that. There are mean-seeming people of all ages, and I guess the best way to overcome anything negative is to be nice to everyone, keep an open mind and a positive attitude. :) I am now looking forward to this class again. Thank you :)
To hopeful - Get over it
[ In Reply To ..]
My opinion is that this works both ways. You are passing judgment on them as well before getting to know them. You are there for you and what they think doesn't mater. The same thing happens in almost every workplace and you need to find a way to deal with it if you want to survive. I've had younger and older coworkers and I don't think this has anything to do with age. Workplace bullying is not tolerated these days, if it happens, stand up for yourself and report it. I can't imagine anyone at technical school doing this - was some of it perceived on your part? I was the shy outcast in high school but thankfully I grew up. Take the class; some people will like you and some will not, that's how the world works.
I'm over it... - hopeful
[ In Reply To ..]
Thank you...I understand...I felt like I needed to post here because I needed to talk about it. I was the shy outcast in school, and that is what caused me to leave school and not try to do more. I have a great aunt who has gone to college for years, and she always tried to encourage me, but it didn't get through to me. I was worried about how I was going to deal with any similar situation if I encounter something similar now to what I went through in high school as I have seen people at work even who don't act like they are out of high school. I feel bullying can occur anywhere, even in a technical school or state college, at work, etc. I just know I need to concentrate on what is important, improving our situation for our family. Since having children, they have been my main focus, and that is why I'm going to school. I just need to keep that in mind, and it will get me through anything : )

Don't know if this would help - GC

[ In Reply To ..]
but try to focus on the reason for why you are there, which is to learn something new. You have the confidence because you've been a good student before and so you know you will be successful. Put more emphasis on what your goal for this class is and less emphasis on what people think of you and everything else may fall into place. Anyway, YOU know you are a great person and nothing else matters. Change is definitely hard. Take one step at a time. Good luck!

Here are 2 thoughts: - sm

[ In Reply To ..]
One is that I have noticed that a lot of people feel awkward in these situations, and sometimes unless there is a really outgoing person there, people will just not reach out to one another, which is fine I think. As time goes on, you will hopefully be in more relaxed situations where you can get to know each other.

The other is that I, too, am really shy and have social anxiety. Once my husband told me that a friend of his was going to say hi to me in the grocery store, but it looked like I did not want to talk to anyone. Since then, I've tried to be aware of the barriers I might be putting up. The one thing that seems to help me is to kind of psych myself out before a social encounter. I try to remind myself to just be in the moment and that we are all connected to each other in some way, so I don't have to look at these people as hostile. If I really put my mind to it, I can usually be more open and relaxed around others, which seems to help.

I am an introvert too... - me

[ In Reply To ..]
so I know how you feel. I agree with the other poster who suggested you focus on the class and not your classmates. I also think if you are friendly to them, it may break the ice and once they get to know you hopefully any judgements based on appearance will fade away. If they are much younger, they just might feel that they don't have anything in common with you so will not make the effort, but if you just smile and say hello, it might put them at ease. I am learning some tricks for casual conversation, which I normally hate. I noticed that people really just want to talk about themselves and things they are interested in. I find that if someone asks me a question, it's because they want to tell me something about themselves related to that topic. I have started trying to just answer and then ask them the same question. Often they will go on and on and I can just be the good listener that I naturally am. I also have a few general questions that I ask as conversation starters, like where are you from, etc.

*use - not you - hopeful

[ In Reply To ..]
nm

Why do you care what they think?? - Coder

[ In Reply To ..]
Pretend that I am taking that class, not you. Imagine me sitting there with those students. In your estimation, why do I care what they think or do??? How is it going to affect me? What is the worst they can do to me?

I think that you ought to sit down with paper and write out your answer to that question, once for every person there. In great detail, explain exactly why I need to be concerned about them.

Then come back and tell us your answer. I can just about guarantee that your thinking will have changed.

I am also curious to know exactly what "mean looks" are and how it is possible to tell. I can't say that I have ever recognized one, unless it is that "mean girl" snooty put-down thing. If that is what you are seeing, be glad you saw it! That is your clue that Ms. Mean Girl ... and the ones she hangs out with ... are not worth your time. Stay away from them.

You are there to learn. It is not high school. It is not a social event. They are not your peers. Nothing they can do will harm you. Be a leader because you ARE a leader, even if you are only leading yourself.

For what it is worth, I love being hated for my grades. So should you. It should INSPIRE you. If they put in the time you do on those grades, instead of on hair, nails, clothes, drinking, social events, fighting, and boys, they would have those grades, too.


Why care? - Backwoods Typist

[ In Reply To ..]
Why give a flying leap about what your other classmates think of you? From the way you talk, they are much younger than you are (not trying to be offensive here). You have an advantage over them and that is experience. Where you know to buckle down and get it done, they may be not paying attention or texting on their phones, worrying about their makeup, etc. In the end, you will have studied harder than they have.

You may, as an introvert and having worked at home all these years, be scared and are letting your nerves get to you. It is a scary thing to get out of our comfort zone, but it is obvious by now that these MTSOs do not care about us. If they did, you would not have to take classes. Neither would anybody else. We would make a heck of a lot more and be treated better.

In the end, you need to worry about you. Not the others. I don't care what anybody else thinks of me. I am who I am. If you don't like it, then go to heck. If makeup or a perfect hairdo is what it took for someone to like me, then I think I would rather be friends with a bunch of stray dogs. At least they would appreciate my

In the end, people appreciate you more for being you, and that means standing up for your beliefs, your values, and not letting others push you around. You are in a class to learn, not worry about whether they like you or not. High school is in your past, so leave it there and gain some confidence in yourself. You are smart for having gotten out of MT, intelligent for going back to school and worldly in your views. I think you are a wonderful person.

Good luck to you and I hope you keep us posted.

My Thoughts - see msg

[ In Reply To ..]
Anybody with any depth as a person doesn't need to have a fancy hair-do, make-up, or be into other "girly" stuff. If you are clean and neat (in other words, good hygiene, a pulled back hair-do or half-styled hair-do, and un-sloppy clothes), you likely aren't being put off because of that.

If all is well with your grooming, etc., it could be the "air" you present. You could unwittingly be sending some sort of message through body language that you don't want to be bothered with other people. Which (to some extent) is true because other people make you feel uncomfortable. This ISN'T a cut-down, it's just a fact.

I honestly don't think anyone is giving you mean looks, unless your hygiene is poor or you look a mess. A person doesn't need a fancy hair-do, clothes or anything girlie to look neat and clean. I am a bit of a girlie-girl, but I don't wear make-up, fancy clothes or have a fancy hair-do. I put on a bit of jewelry now and then, but not always.

Anyway, I think you should concentrate on your class. You can get jobs where you aren't with a lot of people. A one-woman office manager/secretary might be the perfect job for you.

Most of us greatly exaggerate how much other people - are thinking about us at all.

[ In Reply To ..]
Most human beings are *very* preoccupied with themselves. We're thinking about our own appearance, our own problems, our own plans, our own love life, whatever.

Even you, while you might seem to be focusing on others in the classroom, are in fact preoccupied with yourself, and I suspect that there's a grain of truth in your husband's suggestion that at least some of the "mean looks" were more a matter of your interpretation than reality. After all, you didn't know these people, right?

Of course, people who don't know each other can be put off by appearances, and you do seem to suggest that your appearance might be off-putting. As I read your post, I did find myself wondering whether you might be subconsciously deliberately creating an appearance that others find repelling in some way. This is not uncommon in people who are anti-social (and I do think you probably are anti-social, because of your early experiences with people).

If true, you should realize that this is a not only a maladaptive protective mechanism, it's a way of rejecting the "norms" of a society that has not been kind to you.

I can't help but believe that you would benefit from counseling.

I agree with some of what you say here but... - hopeful

[ In Reply To ..]
I seriously don't look abnormal. I look like a 30-some year old parent who doesn't have or want to make time to focus on my appearance in the way some people do. I take a shower, wash and condition my hair, brush my hair, might put it in a ponytail somedays. I started getting a few grays, and I dye my hair a normal brown color. There is nothing about my appearance that I feel would be offputting to anyone. I just don't have the latest fashions (never have been into fashion or fads much), don't straighten or curl my hair (it's naturally a little wavy, some little frizzes here and there), and I don't like makeup or tanning. I grew up with a mother who was the exact opposite, always tanned, wouldn't leave the house without makeup, etc. Is there something wrong with wanting to be myself? My idea of makeup is occasional nail polish and chapstick

Well, of course I don't know you. As I said, it was something - I considered because it's common

[ In Reply To ..]
...in people who suffer from your condition. Society rejected me, so I'll reject society (by nonconformance with the usual social "norms").

Believe me, I felt a very strong sense of compassion for you in reading your post and merely presented a possibility for your consideration.

Youthful scars can run very deep, and they often don't heal until they're dealt with properly. I do hope you seek professional help while there's still lots of life yet to be lived. You won't live it fully until this issue is put to rest - and it can be.

What do you mean by anti-social? - hopeful

[ In Reply To ..]
because of your earlier experiences with people? It's hard to understand if you mean the way I was bullied in high school caused me to be anti-social or you feel they bullied me because I was anti-social?

I was not anti-social. I went to school everyday to learn, and I was treated like garbage by people. I was a normal-looking kid with long blonde hair, and I was short and skinny. I'm just stating what I looked like as really I still don't understand why I was picked on. I tried to be nice to everyone. I think what a lot of people don't quite get is the bullying is not about the person who is bullied, regardless of what they look like. The bullying is about the people doing the bullying. The bullies are the ones with problems. Also, if people wanted to be cruel and heartless like bullies, they could find any imperfection with anyone to try to tear them down. Nobody is perfect, but some people choose to be kind and not tear others down.

That's not to say the bullying didn't create problems for me, it has. I've tried counseling several times and have stopped for various reasons, one being that I'm extremely busy with everything going on in my life, and I feel if I focus on the good things and do my best, things will get better.

I don't feel I'm antisocial. I actually enjoy helping people, and I look out for relatives and friends who are going through hard times. I also love animals and volunteer. After re-reading your response, I'm just confused about the anti-social bit. I'm only anti-social against people who are mean to others. There is no reason to be mean to others unprovoked. Even when I've been provoked before in certain situations (i had a neighbor be very rude and not directly come to me in a civil manner when I was taking care of 2 stray cats), anyway, even in that situation, I was very nice to him and told him he could've just knocked on my door and talked to me about it. I guess I just wish we lived in a world that was a little less cruel sometimes.

Maybe my unresolved feelings about - hopeful

[ In Reply To ..]
how I was bullied cause me to sometimes think the worst of people before I know them. Maybe I'm guilty of judging them in a different way, automatically assuming someone might be unfriendly or mean....
Anti-Social - see msg
[ In Reply To ..]
The most common definition of antisocial is that you don't conform to the RULES of society. The OP most certainly does conform to the rules of society by obeying all the laws.

Asocial is another word, which means totally non-social. I don't know that asocial applies here, either.

Either way, we don't want to label the OP. She has explained that she is neat and clean, so we know it's not her appearance that is a problem.

OP: You may have either had the wrong therapist, or you left therapy because you were getting close to some truths. It doesn't matter, but it sounds like you are torturing yourself.

I hope you can find your way and find some peace. There ARE jobs for people like you who are uncomfortable around other people. If you are comfortable with people over the phone, there ARE customer service jobs out there where you can work from home and not have to deal with the day-to-day people stuff!
Leaving isolating job - hopeful
[ In Reply To ..]
I completely disagree...What I don't need is a job that isolates me as at-home medical transcription or even in-house medical transcription did. I had some very nice coworkers, but even while working in the hospital we have to have our headphones on most of the time. I don't hate people or not get along well with others. I had a data entry customs brokerage job before transcription, and I enjoyed it. I would wait on people as they crossed the border from Canada. Although I loved it at first, I no longer enjoy working from home. I also wouldn't want a job where I'm on the phone. I'm going to school so I can have a better paying job, and I feel I'll have no choice but to get used to being around other people. Transcription was very isolating, and I need to get out of this rut.
Then my suggestion would be ... - sm
[ In Reply To ..]
Then my suggestion would be to stop focusing on what you think people are thinking about you, stop focusing on what you think their looks mean, stop focusing on your need to rebel against your fashion-plate-perfectionist mother, stop focusing on the fact that you were bullied in high school, stop focusing on the belief that people hate you for your grades, and just stop focusing on a of those things that never did you any good.

Mothers can be damaging to our self-esteem. High schoolers can be hateful bullies. Good grades bother everyone except the person who gets them. It is all unfortunate, but YOU DON'T HAVE TO LIVE THERE IN THE PAST.

High school was over with twenty years ago. Leave the building, already!

Just take the class to learn what you need and be done with it. Get on with your life.

I would also encourage you to stop thinking that you need to look and act like 20-year-olds. Unless you are attending bartending or pole-dancing school, you don't. Instead, you need to look professional.

I don't know what this course is, but going by the description of the women in it, I would guess that it is beneath your ability and that you will be wasting money as well as setting yourself up for frustration.

If the students in the course are shallow, fashion-focused 20-year-olds, THE WORKPLACE WILL BE THE SAME. You need to think about that before you start that course.







I needed to hear this...thank you - hopeful
[ In Reply To ..]
Thank you for all of the helpful advice. I know these things should've been obvious to me, but you pointing them out helped me realize a bit about why I feel the way I do. You are right. I need to concentrate on what is important and not worry about silly nonsense. It's an STNA class. I'm using it as a stepping stone and temporary job (for three years) while I go to school to be an RN. The training takes place in a nursing home, and they usually offer their students a position when the class is over. They already interviewed everyone in the class for the potential STNA position at the end of the course. I've seen the residents there, and I think I will enjoy the job. I have worked with coworkers who have caused problems before. I worked at night full time with a part-time person who would often leave to have her nails done, and she would tell me not to tell, so I never did. Anyway, one of the daytime ladies complained to our boss that nothing gets done at night which I thought was unusual because I usually cleared the system out and had spare time to file. Anyway, when my boss told us of this, I asked her if she could print out a list of how much I do at night. She printed out how much everyone did, and it turns out I did the most work there, although most of the time I worked completely by myself at night. If necessary, I do know how to stand up for myself, so I'll just remember that, too. I almost feel ridiculous for making this post, but I felt I needed someone to talk to who might understand. It's a hard transition to go from working mostly at home for years out into the "real world" again. Thanks for helping to wake me up to see I'm worrying about silly stuff and need to focus on what is important.
Excellent! I am glad to hear it! - Just one more comment...
[ In Reply To ..]
That is a very good plan and sounds like a good course. You should do fine with it. I wish you the best of luck.

Just one or two more comments. The first is ... scrub suits. The fashion thing is going to disappear the minute everyone is wearing scrub suits and nursing shoes. If you don't all have to wear the same kind, you can express your little heart out with cheery prints.

The hair, makeup, jewelry, and nail thing is also going to go bye-bye. At my facility, hair has to be off the face and collar, no jewelry, minimal makeup, and absolutely no fake nails, no wraps, no gels. They are all an infection control issue. Nails must be natural and less than 1/4 inch long.

Finally, you can be responsible for your own behavior. It is not so much necessary to police or be resonsible for others unless ... in your new job ... it becomes a patient safety issue. You are bright and mature, so you will do fine with that.

You have a wonderful chance to reinvent yourself! Have a great time doing it!!!




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I'll try not to make this too long, but I have an 18-year-old, soon to be 19-year-old son who just told me a couple months ago that he is gay.  I was shocked, but not totally, as I had suspicions before because he never really showed much interest in girls.  Anyway, I told him I love him no matter what and that did not matter to me.  it took me a couple months to get over the heartache of it, though.  His dad doesn't know yet, nor his younger brother, as I told him ...

Need Some AdviceJul 18, 2011
I am having some issues with my boyfriend.  He has not been working for a while now and I have been paying rent/bills/groceries all on my own.  No big deal, it has to be done, but what I am having a problem with is his bi-weekly "allowance".  He needs his own money to spend, and I understand that, but no matter how much money I tell him I am going to give him, it is never enough.  He is never happy with what I give him (usually a couple hundred dollars).  I never sp ...

Need AdviceApr 05, 2011
I need some advice about my sister-in-law.  We are going to her house next week for three days.   Well, she wanted my husband to help her buy some power tools and teach her how to use them and put up a trellis.   So that was the plan for Friday.   I was okay with that – didn’t feel too left out.  Now she has made other plans for Saturday that I don't want to do.   How do I politely tell her I’m not into spend ...

A Little Advice Here PleaseAug 18, 2016
Just got on line to check bank account held jointly with fiance.  I see a charge on a credit card that I don't recognize (plus a service fee charge).  Questioned him about it  a couple of days ago and got vague answer (s).  Today, I called the 1-800 number and asked what kind of businesses they billed for.  I was told a wide array of different things.  One of which could be porn videos.  Not happy at all as I do NOT want this in my house.  Why can ...

Advice, PleaseSep 02, 2016
Asking advice here. My mom is in a nursing home.  They provide great, compassionate care, and there's a waiting list to get in.  I'm grateful that she's in a place we can afford, and it's only 3 miles from my home. When the need arose, I got her a wheelchair, which Medicare is still paying for.  It was a brand-new chair that was fitted to her petite frame, and she was able to propel herself with her feet.  About 6 weeks ago, I noticed that the chair in h ...

How Do You: Advice PleaseJun 13, 2010
I am separated from my husband and soon divorcing which is actually a  very good thing for my son and me.  We were under a lot of stress, pressure and difficulties with living in his house.  But my son grew up with his kids and he has not told them anything about us never coming back.  I tried to get him to go to counseling, and despite many of my friends warnings even went to our pastor which just made things worse, b/c my husband works under this guy as a pastor too.  ...

Cat Advice?Jul 25, 2012
Cat people, should I take in a neighbor's cat? In a nutshell: We thought this "stray" was hanging around our yard last year. I talked to her and she let me pet her. Nasty winter weather came. We couldn't take her in because we have an old blind cat who tries to fight her off sometimes. So I went door to door with her picture, looking for her home so we wouldn't have to take her to a shelter. Bingo. She "lives" a couple houses away. The woman there was very nice, has a sec ...

Advice PleaseNov 17, 2012
Hi all, I have been offered a position in the front office of a medical facility.  I am probably going to take it.  While my problem will not weigh into my not taking it, I need some advice on how to handle something. Way back when I worked in a large office, there was ALWAYS something going on where they wanted everyone to chip in financially for something.  Somebody is having a baby, somebody's somebody is having a baby, somebody is having a birthday, somebody is retiring ...

Advice On New JobAug 11, 2016
Well, I went to a job fair yesterday, had to go back and my daughter went with me and we both got jobs! Problem with mine is it's only seasonal till Feb. Of course, if the job continues and I've done well through the training and the actual job till Feb., I could possibly still have a job. Better pay right off the bat and $1.00 for EVERY HOUR worked till Feb. bonus in Feb.!!! I need my high school diploma or transcripts and can't find them anywhere! My transcripts are with m ...

Advice About DadNov 01, 2013
I need some opinions about whether or not to try to contact my father who I have not seen in about 30 years. My dad left when I was nine and moved out of state. I think I saw him one time not long after that. The last time I even spoke to him on the phone was right before I graduated high school. He had wrote me letters and sent cards for a few years after he left asking me to come visit, which I never agreed to do. We didn't have a very close relationship even when we lived in the ...

Need Some Advice Jan 13, 2014
I would appreciate any advice on how to sell Hummel figurines, etc.  My stepfather wants to start clearing out a lot of things in preparation for the future, and in the event I would move in with him at some point.  My mother died four years ago, and during her lifetime she bought a lot of this sort of thing, along with the colored glass in yellow, green and blue.  I have never sold anything on eBay, and don't know how to go about getting a decent price for these items.  ...

Advice PleaseJun 21, 2014
I don't know if I need advice or just want to vent. My husband and I enjoy having close friends over, going out to dinner with them, doing get togethers and other such things. Out of 4 couples, 2 of the couples are so dysfunctional that it makes me crazy. No alcohol is involved here, so we can't even blame that. I don't claim to know what goes on behind closed doors, but when we're all together, it's the women who fly off the handle at their husbands for the stupi ...

Need Cat AdviceJan 27, 2015
My cat is hiding underneath my neighbor's shrubs and will not come home. He is afraid I will keep him inside so he doesn't trust me anymore. He stayed out all night last night and I finally saw him this morning. I tried coaxing him, bribing him with food, and he just ran away to find a safer hiding spot. He got into a cat fight on Friday and got a small puncture wound. I kept him in on Sunday to keep an eye on the wound and he was not happy about it. That's why he doesn' ...

Need Some Advice PleaseJan 30, 2015
I have a problem with my ear. When my pneumonia started, one day I had what I thought was the starting of an earache. Then that went away and I ended up sick just with the pneumonia. Okay it has been 28 days since my first day in the hospital. My ear has been stopped up since then and I have tried Claritin, Auralgan and Cortisporin Otic drops. Nothing is working. What could be wrong with it? I never have problems popping my ears after a cold or getting water in them. I didn't g ...

Need AdviceMar 17, 2017
Need some advice.   Here's what happened (by the way, I'm a 25-year MT veteran, which is why I'm posting here). I was unwell at work about 3 weeks ago, and it was determined that I should be admitted.  Treatment lasted 8 days, and I feel great now!  My doctor said I should apply for FMLA (famliy medical leave) since I took off more time than my employer's policy allows and may have further absences in the future.  My doctor completed the form and signed ...

Hi, Need Some AdviceMar 30, 2017
I had a severe dental infection and was given clindamycin.  I was hesitant to take it, but did so with a probiotic.  Now I am starting to have diarrhea.  Does anyone have any advice on treating this OTC?  I'm recently retired and have no insurance at present.  Thanks in advance.   ...

Advice For A New E-Bay Seller?Feb 28, 2012
I  have created an exceptional product that I want to list on e-Bay to make some extra money. Are there any experienced e-Bay sellers here who can give me some advice/tips/suggestions? Thanks! ...