Since we were kids, my sister has been ratting me out to mom!

As an adult, she hasn't changed that much.  Always looking for something to tell mom about me or just plain gossip about me to mom and anyone else who will isten.  As a young adult, when I still had the energy to have a fiery temper, I would fight with her.  After I had my second child, I decided to just not pay attention to her anymore and just ignore her BS.  Our kids are now teenagers and still my sister plays her games.  Today I finally blew like Mount St. Helens!  My son has been giving me a lot of trouble, running with the wrong crowd, drinking, smoking pot, breaking curfew, etc.  I'm divorced, but I've been allowing my ex to spend more time in the house to help me deal with our son. 

We live in a very VERY small town where everybody knows everybody's business which is bad enough.  Multiply that times the fact that my sister lives in the same small town, two minutes from me and you can imagine the microscope I'm living under.  My sister routinely cruises down my street to see if my ex is there, if he is spending the night, etc.  She also likes to see who my son is hanging out with.  She then reports back to my mom.  She tells my mother that my son is doing drugs.  As I said he smokes pot; however, she plants the seeds that he is doing harder drugs because he's in her words "so skinny."  My son is naturally thin.  My husband and his brother and several of their uncles were very thin with a very high metabolism.  I also force my son to submit to random drug testing if he wants to live with me ever since I found pot in his room.  He has tested positive for THC/marijuana and that is it.  NEVER anything else. 

My sister tells my mom that I'm getting back together with my ex because he's over all of the time according to her.  It has gotten to the point where, at one point when my car was in the shop and I needed to get to an appointment my ex took me.  We stopped at the gas station in town after he picked me up so I could put gas in his car for taking me.  That afternoon my mother calls having gotten a report from my sister that my ex and I were spotted at the gas station together. 

If my grass needs to mowed, she tells my mom.  If I bounce a check at the grocery store, she tells me my mom.  If I buy a bottle of wine, she tells my mom.  If I go to the tavern to have a couple of drinks, she tells my mom.  If I decided not to go to church on Sunday, she tells my mom.  I finally left the church all together because I decided I just couldn't go to the same church as my sister.  When I was in the process of my divorce it became evident that my sister had ran her mouth to people at church, because women I didn't know very well were coming up to me telling me they didn't know how I had put up with him so long.  He was an alcoholic, something I had tried to keep private. 

My sister, several years ago in the heat of an argument, told me she had always wanted to smack the you know what out of me and then went on to mock me by saying things like "cute little Lori" and "daddy's little girl" etc.  I don't like to use the word jealous, but I get the impression I've been in some sort of competition since the day I was born.  The reason she likes to talk about my son being so skinny is because her son is overweight and has issues with his weight.  My mother did not like either of our husbands.  I cut mine loose.  She's still with hers.  Her husband has put them in financial straights.  Together they earn a combined 100,000 plus a year and they rent a duplex because they couldn't make their house payment and pay their credit card bills.  The minute anyone points out her husband's or one of her kid's shortcomings, she immediately throws me or my ex or my kids out there even when we have absolutely nothing to do with the conversation.

Today I blew up.  My mother called me with her 20 questions game which usually signifies that she has had a conversation with my sister and now she is confronting me with what my sister told her.  I told my mother I was tired of feeling interrogated or feeling like I'm on trial.  I then called my sister and got her voicemail, but left an extremely angry message which ended with stay away from my kids and my home and find someone else to gossip about.

Now I'm refusing to answer the phone because I'm supposed to be working.  My mom keeps leaving messages saying she doesn't want "us girls" to fight and we should just forget this whole mess.  So what did my mom think would happen when she called me and started in with "is your ex there, is he living there, is your son hanging with drug dealers, is he a meth head...."  I have enough stress in my life without having to answer to my mother for every thing I do and say!  Last time I checked I was 44 years old. 

Now my mom is leaving messages wanting us to all have lunch and talk this out.  Personally, I would love to not have to talk to either of them for a very long time, but my mom is my mom and ever since my dad passed, I'm really cognizant of the fact that time is fleeting.  But can't I be angry for a few days!

Anyway, I just wanted to type all this out to release some of my anger.  That way when I decide to finally answer the phone, I will have gotten some of it out of my system.