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I am the worst neighbor in the world

Posted: Apr 13, 2010

If I could buy a cabin in the Rocky Mountains on 40 acres of land, I would. Except I can't.

I live in apartments because that is my only financial option (long story, lots of people have a similar one), so I really should try to accept my situation and live a happy life. Except I just want things the way I want things and I believe since I've been single and working from home since 1997, I have become a hermit crab and like it enough I am not motivated to change.

My downstairs neighbor moved away (oh, should have paid his rent for him - what a great neighbor). He was single, a professional, with a girlfriend with a house, not a smoker, always gone. Darn if they didn't get married. My new neighbors are 4 adults, 2 kids, one infant and a yellow lab. All the adults smoke sitting on my stairs, crushing the cigs into my bottom wooden step. The dad is a plumber who brings his work home and uses the parking lot to repair whatever equipment he needs to work on - until 9 at night. They don't talk on the phone inside the apt, but stand outside my windows - until 10:30 at night. They don't have television so the 6 and 11 yo kids stay outside from the time they get home from school until dark. None of them know how to turn a knob and pull a door closed. Constant slamming (sometimes 20 times in 30 mins) of 3 doors to the outside. They don't slam the interior doors, thank goodness.

Okay, I'm off my soapbox. I have my health, a beautiful child and (for now) good income. The upside is the new neighbors don't have TV or radio that they blast, plus I'm moving to a different apartment down the hill next week. I'm just a hermit crab stuck in an apartment. (apologies to the smokers reading this. I have Meniere disease and smoke is a trigger. Apologies to the plumbers, I'm just a crab).

;

feel just the way you do! - anon

[ In Reply To ..]
do not apologize to the people who think they own the world and can pollute it with cigarette smoke and loud noise with no consideration for others. You have rights too! All you can do, is just what you are doing...move. I had to, as well. I am happy now in my own little corner of the world with no smokers and no noise...and I do NOT apologize to those who smoke. keep it inside so you do not offend others. blagh!!!! Be a crab all you want to. It is inconsiderate people like those who moved underneath you who make us that way!! Good luck at your new place.

You know, people cannot read your mind :) - Kendra

[ In Reply To ..]
I doubt that these people are doing anything just to irritate you. You could always ask them to not smoke on the stairs and put out their butts on the wooden stairs. I would, however, avoid the "my stairs" approach, or criticizing everything all at once or in a short period of time, lest they start trying to irritate you. As for the kids being outside, I think that's great actually. That's really where kids should be in nice weather, don't you think?

Of course they are not out to irritate me - hermitcrab

[ In Reply To ..]
I never implied that...in fact, I faulted myself for being the crab :) As of this afternoon, the cigerettes have been moved from the crevices in the bottom step and now rest in a gravity defying position in the grooves of mortar between the bricks by their front door (oh, so classy!).

As far as the kids being outside, I almost hit their 6 yo with my car their first night here at dusk...he jumped in front of my car as I was rounding the hill when the ball he was holding fell from his hands and he did what a 6 yo will do...chase it into the street. There was no adult in sight to supervise. I doubled my car insurance the next day...

Just 7 more days, just 7 more days, wish I lived in a cabin...

I know you didn't imply that...just thought that - Kendra

[ In Reply To ..]
a little discussion often goes a long way. Of course I say that, all the while only seeing my neighbors if it suits me.

Common sense just seems to escape some people.... - they should be more considerate...nm

[ In Reply To ..]
nm

I read your post at first to read - yellow CAB LOL sm

[ In Reply To ..]
I'm a crab too, literally, a moon child. If you are that kind of crab, I feel your pain.

I'm kinda having the same experience except IN my house and not nearly as bad as what you're going through. No smoke, but I live in a 2-bedroom loft. My college son is upstairs. His GF comes on the weekends. When he's here alone, it's not so bad, but when she comes, they watch movies, etc. The loft is upstairs, but has an opening (a big window) to the living room, so I can hear their movies louder than they do.

Anyhow... my college daughter (away) graduates in May and is coming home. We will have to share my office/her bedroom... I sleep on the couch anyhow, so no problem there, but I'm starting to stress about the whole situation because she has no patience with the GF.

Hopefully a temp situation, as she will go to grad school in the fall or winter semester, or work shortly.

But I understand the space issue you are experiencing... just be happy they are "somewhat" outside.

Hey... we can go halfsies on the cabin in the Rockies!! LOL As long as there's DSL.

AND wow.... my mom taught me how to close a door when I was in the womb...

I can feel your pain too! - hermitcrab

[ In Reply To ..]
I also lived in a loft cottage for a while with a roommate and a medium-sized parrot. The bird plucked out all his feathers from the stress! Didn't help that it mimicked everything that was said, even um, those intimate moment noises

I think my neighbors will soon be getting a clue about what is expected to live here. I didn't mention, but it is one of the more upscale complexes in this area. We have valet garbage pickup every night by our front doors. I set up 4 bags of stuff I am getting rid of in preparation for the move. Mine was taken away. Their can sits exactly as they left it...strips of insulation falling out the top of the can, not bagged. The valet service won't take it unless it is boxed or bagged. Oh, last night there were no slamming doors. I guess the guy was in the mood and I heard it later as I stayed up late to work So glad to have a spare set of noise-drowning headsets!

Got a laugh out of yellow Cab!

Youre not the worlds worst neighbor, but your - neighbors are definitely in the running!

[ In Reply To ..]
Hmmm. Are all these people in a 1-bedroom apartment? If so, check and see what the occupancy limits are in your building. Might be there are a few under-the-radar "squatters" in there. Might even be too many for a 2-bedroom.

Does your building have a "quiet" curfew? Most are 10 PM on weekdays, 11 PM on weekends. They might be in violation of that.

Are the owners aware the plumber is doing some of his plumbing work on their property? In addition to being an eyesore, it may be a legal/liability issue.

I feel just like you. Only I lived in a downstairs apartment. Had people tromping around on my ceiling all the time. I also couldn't figure out why all these people move into tiny apartments, and then buy a humongous, giant-screen TV or equally large stereo, both with surround-sound. Then they put on violent videogames with lots of crashes and explosions, and play them at full-blast volume. It used to actually shake the pictures off my walls.

It never fails about the good neighbors - they always leave! And who stays forever and ever? The horrible ones!

I'm with you. If I ever win the Lottery, I don't need a big mansion. Just a cozy little cabin surrounded by lots of wooded land, and NO neighbors within earshot.

wow, I could have written your post, totally agree, ...! - living downstairs

[ In Reply To ..]
nm

true, toddlers are the worst when one lives - cute toddlers?

[ In Reply To ..]
downstairs, trampeling around, 24/7, riding bicycles and scooters back and forth in the apartment, eeeewwww, not "cute" anymore...

I blame the landlord. There is a limit - noise

[ In Reply To ..]
how many people can live in an apartment, depending on the size.
Since the former tenant was a single man, the apartment cannot be that large.

I think 7 people and a dog is too much, unless the apartment is really big.

Also, so much noise and all that smoking, you have definitely the right to complain a lot.

You should stay and they should get evicted.

It is a 2 bedroom plus quote den unquote - hermitcrab

[ In Reply To ..]
I use the den as my office. And I pay more for the stairs (they are not shared stairs) and a spacious front porch than the downstairs neighbor, hence my feeling of ownership about those stairs. The main couple is probably in their mid 40s and the younger couple is in their early 20s. In fact, the baby came straight from the hospital to the apartment, being a child of the younger couple. The older couple have a total of 8 kids, which is why the count varies from day-to-day; some kids come for a weekly visit or stay for 2 weeks and go back to the other parent for shared parenting. They use the den (no door, no closet) for a third bedroom.

We both have screened-in porches 13 feet by 8 feet wide that they could go to for smoking, but that is where they keep the dog. Big surprise, the dog broke through one of the screen windows today and ran off. They beat this poor animal with a stick because it is bored.

It's just that mentality of 'what is mine is mine and what is yours is mine if I want it and you better get used to it' attitude. No respect. I did have a chat with the new manager on Friday and she knew who I was talking about without having to look it up in the computer. I still plan to move (36 hours now and counting!) because I can't out last these people. I can't watch how they live and be okay with it. I am moving into a 2 bedroom in the same complex and plan to put windows in the screened-in porch to use as my office. It is closer to the leasing office and has more video surveillance, so it is more peaceful. As I told the manager, I am SURE they are probably nice people, BUT...I don't want to be their neighbors. I am from a southern state and my northern friends used to say, you can take the girl out of (the state), but you can't take (the state) out of the girl. These people prove this saying, only substitute (the state) for trash living.

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