A community of 30,000 US Transcriptionist serving Medical Transcription Industry
Problem with neighbor
Posted: Jun 21, 2014
I'm starting to have a problem with my neighbor. We live in a community of little cottages that are very close together. The decks of the individual cottages are actually joined, so there is really only a few feet between our back door and their back door. They just had a baby, and the other day, he came over and was complaining to my husband about his smoke coming in their window. We are not supposed to smoke inside the unit, and when we moved in, the property manager said that everyone in the community who smokes, does it out on their decks, so that is where he is supposed to be smoking. The neighbor also smokes and said that they have been walking away from the house to smoke and pretty much said my husband should do the same. Now, I wholeheartedly agree that their baby shouldn't be exposed to smoke; however, his request is way out of line to me. They are the one with the problem, so they can go buy a fan and put it in the window blowing out, which would blow away any smoke that wafts their way. It's not like he's intentionally blowing smoke in that direction. He blows it the opposite way. I guess sometimes the wind blows it back. Now, tonight, I was outside crushing cans for recycling, and the neighbor comes out and asks me to do that during the day because his baby is sleeping. If it had been 9:00 or 10:00 at night, it would be one thing, but it was only 7:30, which I don't really think is too late to be making noise. Are they going to give me a schedule of when their baby sleeps so I can tiptoe around not making any noise during that time? Am I wrong in thinking they shouldn't be making their baby my problem? I'm not trying to be nasty, but I just don't think they have a right to complain about anything we are doing. After all, I'm not enjoying listening to their baby scream like clockwork at 1:00 in the morning when I'm trying to sleep, but I wouldn't dream of going over there and complaining to them about it. ;
babies are not babies forever - but smoke coming in my house gags me
[ In Reply To ..]You could simply move your can crushing set up to the front of the house for a while, no biggie.
As to your smoke, that's another story. I will start by saying I fully support your right to smoke. I also support my right not to breathe your smoke. If your smoke comes in my home, it is your problem. My neighbors just moved out and I am able to use my back porch again. I had to wrap my back porch in plastic to keep the smoke from ruining whatever I put on my porch. You don't have the right to destroy my property with your smoke. You don't have the right to cause me breathing problems from your second-hand smoke.
If you want to keep getting along with your neighbors, you should act neighborly and be considerate towards them. They don't have the right to rule your life, but a baby is not a baby forever, and a little consideration and understanding will go a long way in maintaining a good relationship with the people you live next door to.
Partial Solution - see msg
[ In Reply To ..]First off, crushing cans all at once is a choice--a baby crying is not. You can crush your cans as you use them. In other words, when you use a can, just crush it, and voi la, no more noisy can crushing en masse. One less chore for you, actually. We just rinse it, crush it and put it in the bin as we use it. If you're collecting them on a table before they go into the bin, still crush it right after you use it, then just throw them all in at once--though that would be noisy, too.
Smoke is offensive and a choice, but I won't go there.
Living in a community where you're on top of each other is a choice, too. I personally would never live on top of other people like that. Way too annoying.
Maybe cut them some slack - Anon
[ In Reply To ..]I'm not a parent so I can just speculate, but if it's their first baby, maybe cut them some slack. They are probably freaking out having a new baby, first time parents worried about everything, on top of sleep depravation. I know it's a pain living so close, my neighbors are closer than I'd like too, but I just have to live with it or move. On MT wages and where I live, I can't afford a nicer, quieter place, so I do what I can to get along. Ultimately I had to get over it, because I was just stressing myself out and they just kept doing whatever they were going to do and eventually they moved and now I have quiet neighbors again.
so, you did not crush cans at night simply to annoy him? - and, smoke in another area.
[ In Reply To ..]nm
Um No... - annoyed
[ In Reply To ..]And it was 7:30, not the middle of the night. I don't think anyone has the right to expect complete silence at 7:30. None of the things we are doing were a problem for the past year and a half, so I'm sorry, but I don't think we should have to be inconvenienced because they had a baby in a place that is not baby-friendly. I put up with his drunken parties until the middle of the night before he got married and never complained once. I put up with their television that they have at deafening levels to the point that I can't even hear my television. Not to mention the fact that he is a total hypocrite. A couple months ago, he came over and was drunk and being all loud. New people had just moved in next to us, and my husband mentioned that he hadn't met them yet and didn't know how cool they were. Neighbor's response was, "F*** them. Look at where we live. What do they expect?"
However, now that it is him being disturbed, everyone is supposed to jump to please him.
Question for Annoyed - see msg
[ In Reply To ..]Why didn't you give us some "back story" in your original post? You brought us to the middle of a story, so that put us at a disadvantage.
I did not presume that you purposefully made noise with the cans to bother him, but now that you know it's an annoyance to the neighbor, you can at least not provoke him with your cans--whether intentional or not.
Do as I suggested for that part, and just crush them as you use them. I'm assuming they're aluminum and don't need to be stomped on with your feet. I can crush one aluminum can with one hand without much trouble at all.
Because I wasn't trying to write a novel - Annoyed
[ In Reply To ..]I was just dealing with the immediate situation. I guess I was also not trying to come right out and call him an alcoholic hypocrite, but there you go.
It was only maybe six cans that I was crushing anyway, so it was not like I saved up a ton of cans, and I was doing it when I got off work. When he asked, I left the couple remaining cans until this morning and told him I was sorry, but it does annoy me. Like I said, had it been later than 7:30, I could totally see his point, but things are going to wake up their baby. Several of the other neighbors have dogs that intermittently bark throughout the day and night. The other neighbor has an extremely loud vehicle that she starts up every morning at 5:30. What are they going to do about these things? When you live this close together, your neighbors are going to do things that annoy you. If you can't deal with that, then maybe it's time to find a different place to live.
Thoughts - sm
[ In Reply To ..]You may have a right to indulge your tobacco abuse disorder -- a drug addiction, if you did not know it -- but you do not have the right to inflict second-hand smoke on anyone else, especially infants and others who are powerless to remove themselves from your toxic effluent.
Your neighbors are correct in asking you not to smoke where it blows into their windows. Second-hand smoke is actually more hazardous than what the smoker inhales. Exposure to it causes serious problems for children and is a known cause of sudden myocardial infarctions in nonsmoking adults.
Perhaps if your husband can't stop smoking, he can switch to vapor "cigarettes." Where I work, smoking has been almost entirely banned and the social stigma of stinking of cigarettes has become severe. Smokers are switching to vaping in droves, saying they prefer it. It is cheaper, apparently, less obvious, and they no longer smell repulsive.
Otherwise, your husband needs to smoke further away from the cottages.
Suggesting they need to put a fan in the baby's win butdow is not appropriate. It would only draw smoke in from another opening and it would cause a draft. It isn't going to work when the weather turns cooler, either. This isn't THEIR problem. It is YOURS. Fix it yourself.
As for the can-smashing noise ... that is YOUR problem, too. I can't imagine how you cause noise that way. I don't. I have never encountered anyone who did.
I live in a condominium, in very close proximity to my neighbors. I would be embarrassed to death if my neighbors had to ask me to stop doing something that was even slightly annoying, much less something that was environmentally hazardous. It is part of trying to be socially responsible.
In this state, our clean indoor air act is so stringent that your neighbors would have a legal avenue for remediation of that smoke problem. All they would need to do is call the police. They can probably do the same in your state, and I'll bet they can "remediate" both problems at once by calling the landlord.
My husband and I live in a one family home as - are the homes in my neighborhood but
[ In Reply To ..]the neighbors beside me on the right and left share the same patch of woody area behind our homes. Neighbor on 1 side decided he would build a pit and started a bonfire and went inside left it flaming up in the air close to "our" woods. I just called the fire department. That took care of the situation. Other than that, I live in an HOA and things go really smoothly here.
Problem with neighbor- - Geeze people
[ In Reply To ..]sounds like the couple with the baby should not be living in a cottage atmosphere. The OP has a right to live her life the way she wants, she didn't have a baby. Doesn't sound like they are rude and do try to be accommodating. Just because the neighbors decided to have a baby, the world does not need to accommodate them. If the neighbors are the ones uncomfortable then they should move. It is 1 thing to be considerate and another to be asked to change your pattern of life.
Thank you! - annoyed
[ In Reply To ..]That is exactly my point. If I wanted to have to tiptoe around so as not to wake the baby, I would have had my own baby. I certainly didn't intentionally wake their child up, and I did stop when I found out I did. We try to be as quiet as possible after 9:00 because we are in such close proximity, but to expect me to think about their baby being asleep at 7:30 is a bit much.
Sadly, babies do not sleep 10 to 6 ... - Also question for you
[ In Reply To ..]Babies sleep around the clock, unfortunately. A lot of your neighbor's angst may be due to the fact that they are only guaranteed to be scream-free when they are sleeping. Sleeping is, therefore, highly desirable at any hour. No one wakes sleeping babies for just this reason.
Question for you, though. Just how were you crushing those cans? I have been pondering this all day, but can't think of any way to make noise with it. What were you using, a sledgehammer?
Can crusher that I got at Home Depot. - We have limited space
[ In Reply To ..]so every little bit of extra space saved helps.
Diesel-powered industrial?? - Do you collect cans for recycling?
[ In Reply To ..]I'm having trouble visualizing this. How exactly do they make noise? The ones online don't look too ominous. Is your model some sort of high volume, motorized version? Like a miniature of the kind that smash cars?
Pro-Forge can crusher. - I'm not running heavy machinery
[ In Reply To ..]It's a metal thing mounted to the side of the house, you stick the can it, manually pull the handle down to crush the can. It makes probably about the same amount of noise as when you step on a can to crush it.
My thoughts - been in both circumstances - sm
[ In Reply To ..]We've lived in many places (over 40 places in a matter of 30 years), so have lived in close proximity. I have to agree with the other posters.
This should not be a problem (as you call it). As a fellow human being you should be happy to help out in any way. A lot of people think that smoking is a right. Maybe if you didn't live within close proximity, but the fact is you do. They have a new baby. If that baby were to contract respiratory problems or asthma because of the second hand smoke from you smoking how would you feel?
Just because the manager said you could smoke on your decks does not mean it is set in stone that that is where you will smoke. You said that the decks are joined. That means that cigarette smoke or BBQ or smells are going to permeate other peoples places. We used to live in an apartment and the next door neighbors smoked. It came through the walls. We'd be sleeping and would wake up having difficulty breathing and then realized they were in their bedroom smoking. We couldn't sit on our porch cos they would smoke. On top of that it came through the kitchen vent over our stove. Plus they would BBQ and leave the remaining un-eaten food on their porch for a couple days. The stink penetrated into our living room.
The truth of the matter is that not only does cigarette smoking stink, but has some serious health effects that go along with it. Can you imagine that poor little baby how tiny his/her lungs must be (along with other organs) to be breathing in your cigarette smoke. What I also hate is the people who smoke in their cars and we come up to stop signs and their smoke comes into our vehicle and we have to wait and breath it in until the light turns green (which when you are sitting there unable to breath because of their cigarette smoke, is a long time). Just think about how long can you hold your breath under water. Its the same thing.
Cigarette smoking is not a "right", especially if you are putting someone elses life in danger. I would think you would want to give them the same courtesy that you would want in return and be more than happy to smoke further away so that you don't make a baby sick. That's your choice, but just think of it this way. The baby has no choice.
As for crushing cans, why can't you do it during the day. Is it really that big of a deal to you?
I too have never had a baby, but we have neighbors who do. In fact right now there is a baby crying somewhere in our neighborhood. Luckily its afternoon, but I'm sure newborns cry at all different times and the poor parents probably get very little sleep. I'm sure you are not liking being woken at 1 am to a screaming baby (been there done that), but a baby crying is nothing they can do about, but your smoking and crushing cans you can do something about.
You should want to be courteous to your neighbors. That's what life is about, being considerate of other people.
In answer to your last paragraph, that's a yes & no response. They are not making their baby your problem, you are. Also babies are not "a problem". Yes they do have a right to complain about stuff that is affecting their living situation. When I had smoke coming into my apartment I complained to the manager, just like when they had loud party noise at 2 am I complained to the manager.
To go over and complain that their baby is crying would be wrong. To go over and complain that if they were smoking some nasty stuff or playing loud music or whatever would be a valid reason.
You need to put things in perspective and think about other people besides yourselves.
Agree about the smoke - Here's a good example
[ In Reply To ..]Nothing makes me more upset than trying to enter or exit our mall without literally getting a mouth of someone's cigarette smoke. As in the OPs post, they are not permitted to smoke inside, so everyone stands directly in front of the mall doors. People should just use a little common sense. If I wanted that crap in my lungs, I would smoke. No one has the right to inflict their dangerous and nasty habits on someone else.
I'll just bet - SM
[ In Reply To ..]Both of you hit the "dislike" at the same time you lit up.
OMG! Seriously people! - Anon
[ In Reply To ..]I totally agree with "Geez people" above. Why are you all ragging on the OP? Just because somebody else has a baby, doesn't mean she has to change everything in her life to accommodate them. I am not a smoker and don't like to be around smokers, but the neighbors have no right to tell other people what to do and when they can do it. As another poster stated, the people with the baby need to find another place to live as living in close proximity to their neighbors is not conducive to their new lifestyle.
The neighbors have EVERY right - This is 2014
[ In Reply To ..]My sister lived in an apartment for many years and was fine. All of a sudden a group of young guys moved into the complex, and they were in close proximity to her apartment. She used to love sitting on her balcony in the evenings, and no longer could. The stench from their ciagretts was overwhelming and constant. Anyone who thinks this is acceptable is living in the stone ages. It kills people. It permiates literally everything. I actually stopped visiting friends of mine because they (and anyone else who was in their family and visiting) were chain smokers. My eyes burned like they were on fire. I would come home and immediately take everything off I was wearing to put everything in the washing machine. The smell was through to my underwear. Smokers don't have an appreciation for how horrible this is for a nonsmoker. I finally told the couple they have a right to do as they choose in their own home, but I could no longer come over. I told them I was dealing with enough health problems, and simply would not subject myself to cigarette smoke. They were nice about it, but it basically ended our relationship. I don't regret it for a minute.
If I were in your sister's situation, I would tell - the landlord that the new smoking - sm
[ In Reply To ..]neighbors were violating the "warranty of habitability". They were also making it so that your sister couldn't engage in "peaceful enjoyment of the property/unit", which is often mentioned in many rental agreements.
Where I used to live, smoking was of course not allowed inside any units, but also it was not allowed out by the pool, or anywhere the smoke could drift into someone's window. They had to either walk out the alley to the street, or else not smoke at all.
OMG, yeah...SERIOUSLY - I am changing something though from my post - Poster you responded to
[ In Reply To ..]Problem 1 - Smoking. Like the poster below said The neighbors have EVERY right to ask them to smoke somewhere else when it comes to their health (especially of someone with such tiny organs that are trying to develop). It's also the neighbors home too. It is the OPs problem, not the neighbors. Take that stinking habit elsewhere. Nobody has the "right" to inflict a drug habit on others. The baby does not have a choice. It is called being courteous to your fellow neighbor.
Problem #2 - crushing cans. I take back what I said in my other post. It is not unreasonable to crush cans at that time. OP said she felt bad and stopped. In that case the neighbor did not have the right to say anything. If it was me I would either crush as I go or I would pick a time during the day to crush and then if they said anything after that, I would tell the neighbor that they stopped crushing at the time they asked them to stop, but they have a life too and they have the right to go on with their lives the way they have been and since they are not making noise late at night they are not going to keep changing their time for them. Asking them to smoke further away from their window and not to crush cans when a baby is sleeping is not dictating everything in their life.
Also, from a different post she posted later it sounds like they have a problem with the neighbor that has been going on for longer, so think there is more to this than just cans and smoking.
To the OP - sorry on my last post. Maybe it was a one time thing the baby was sleeping at that moment. I'd continue to crush cans the way you have been, live your lives the way you have been and if the neighbor asks you to change anything I would simply tell them that you have rearranged your schedule to accommodate them, and you are now smoking further away from the building (which you will do of course, right?) because you understand how dangerous that filthy habit is and don't want to be the cause of a baby's health problems, but you have a life and it is not their place to come and tell you to rearrange your life because they had a baby. Since you are not making any excessive noise and you accommodated their initial requests, you have the right to live your lives as you see fit in your own home.
As a side note I once lived in an apartment and the first night in our apartment the neighbor from below us knocked on our door and told us we were walking too heavy and if we could not bang around so much and walk lighter (we weighed around 125 pounds for me and 160 for my husband). The next day we moved, but I know what it's like to be in your place. The only thing I ask is that you do find a new smoking area. I have family members who smoke, so I always try to be considerate of their feelings as I know its a drug habit they can't quit, but for non-smoking people it is awful. It restricts the lungs, literally takes all the oxygen out of the air around you so you are gasping for air as if you were in a fire and getting smoke inhalation or the same feeling if you are underwater and have no air to breath. There is only so long you can hold your breath and when you do breath you get a mouthful. It tastes nasty and like the other person said permeates your clothes. After my mom died of lung cancer I was gathering some of her pictures from her walls. To my surprise her walls were white (at least behind the pictures they were, the rest of the walls from the smoke were a dingy yellowish brown color (which I thought was the color she chose to paint her house). Now imagine that is what is on your lungs. Might also be a good time to quit if you were thinking about it. Not only for the health things (nothing more painful to watch than your mom dying of such a horrible disease with all these lines, tubes and wires coming out of her), but the cost is out of this world.
Thanks, and I agree about the smoking - Annoyed
[ In Reply To ..]I quit years ago and wish my husband would. I think it is a filthy nasty habit, but he is not going to quit until he is ready to. I certainly don't want their baby to inhale smoke. If that's what my original post sounded like, it is not what I truly meant. I was very upset when I posted that and he is going on the other side of the house to smoke. My only real problem was the noise complaint at a perfectly acceptable hour of the day. They just need to understand that things are going to wake up their baby.
Ironically enough, the people down the street threw a huge party last night with a band that went on until 10:00, and I don't know what they are going to do on the Fourth of July because people around here are pretty fireworks crazy. They were going off all day and night last year.
And she said the father of the baby smokes, too! nm - good fences
[ In Reply To ..]v
You're right about secondhand smoke, and it - harms adults & pets, too. (sm)
[ In Reply To ..]I grew up with a chain-smoking mother, and lived the first 20 years of my life breathing it every day in the house, in the kitchen, in the car. My first office jobs were during the '70s, and back then almost all the office ladies smoked as they worked. I sucked in a lot more at restaurants and on airplanes.
Whenever I went to visit my mother, her house reeked of smoke, and so did every piece of clothing I owned - even if I didn't wear it and it stayed in my suitcase. I had to wash out everything when I got home.
My father passed away from lung cancer, even though he didn't smoke. Surely all the secondhand smoke he breathed during his lifetime was the culprit. I'm sure my mother felt pangs of guilt for having contributed to his earlier-than-necessary demise.
When my mother passed away (of smoking-related congestive heart failure) and my siblings and I prepared to sell the family home, it had to be totally gutted: popcorn ceilings removed, all old paint and wallpaper, and the entire heating/cooling duct system. The workers had to wear Haz-Mat suits as they worked on removing the air ducts, as they were filled with black cigarette tar and other deposits.
Thank goodness the laws about secondhand smoke have become stricter. I now live in a 100% smoke-free environment, but the first third of my life was lived surrounded by smoke. My brothers and sisters and I all worry about how all that secondhand smoke will end up affecting us. Despite our now-healthy lifestyles, we can't help but wonder when the consequences of cigarette smoke are going to pop up in one of us.
I know how you feel - Christine
[ In Reply To ..]I used to work in a small hospital several years back, and it was actually allowed in the waiting room, and the nurse's charting room, which was located a few feet from the nurses' desk. I actually had a supervisor who was a very heavy smoker, and she smoked all day long, a few feet from me. This went on for a long time, and finally one day she asked me to work overtime. I don't know where the courage came from (back in the 70s), but I told her my chest actually hurt from the second-hand smoke in the office. Her face got bright red, and she never smoked at her desk again. The CEO of the hospital spoke to me about it, and I was on a team of employees, who met and finally got a smoke-free environment in the hospital. At that time I also had a part-time job, and there were several girls in the room in which I worked, who smoked non-stop all evening. Again, I spoke to the owner of the business and told her I would work more hours, but I refused due extreme exposure to cigarette smoke. They finally put all the smokers in one room. I, like you, worry about the effect this had on me, and the other people who were affected by it. That's one area I don't commpromise. I live in a 100% smoke-free environment without exception. It's my right, plain and simple.
Perspectives.....SM - I agree with ANON - TX MT
[ In Reply To ..]While I do agree about not harming an infant....I also have to disagree in the fact that it is their "right" to smoke. They pay their rent/house note. That gives them the right to do as they please with accordance of the law. If she/he wants to "squash" cans at 8:45 p.m., they can. Most cities have a noise level law for "late" night and it is usually 9 p.m. for work days, but weekends can be as late as midnight. Just because their neighbors have a baby does not mean they should have to change how they live. They can live the life they choose. WHY should they have to change their life for their neighbors. I would not change my behavior for my neighbors in this situation, and I would not expect them to change theirs. I am not breaking the law. They CAN move, and I would highly suggest it if they don't like what their neighbors are doing.
PS: I am an ex-smoker (and prefer not to smell it but I do everywhere I go). My hubby still smokes. I could care less that he does as he smokes outside.
Sounds like your neighbor - is
[ In Reply To ..]one of the legion of new parents who breed and then declare themselves and their spawn to be the center of the Universe because they (and it) are so terribly special. They are unique and everyone has to bow and defer to them.
This won't end with cans. As their spawn grows, it will morph into whatever they can come up with to make it and themselves the center of attention and annoy the people around them.
Save yourself. Flee now. It will only get worse.
Jeeze Louise..... - sm
[ In Reply To ..]What made you so bitter against parents and their children? You were once someone's "spawn" and most likely the center of your parents universe, at least I hope for your sake. These are probably new parents who are worried, exhausted and hormonal. Sometimes a bit of compassion and flexibility is needed to live in this world.
There is a difference - between
[ In Reply To ..]being the center of one's parents' universe and those parents expecting their very, very special little snowflake to be the center of everyone else's universe. The entire neighborhood cannot be expected to live its life in silence just because one neighbor has produced an offspring.
Other people have a right to be left in peace.
Hellllloooooo....that's the whole point of compassion and flexibility! - sm
[ In Reply To ..]Giving up a small bit of your "peace" as you put it in order to make the lives of the new parents a little easier. I am not saying she has to follow a schedule according to the baby's, but before she goes to crush her cans when she knows the baby is sleeping, maybe she could think not of herself and her can-crushing needs first, but of those of the family next door. This is not a matter of "rights," but a matter of common neighborly courtesy. Just because you have the "right" to do something does not always make that the correct thing to do. The world would be a much better place if people would stop screaming about their "rights" and start quietly doing what was right.
Hello is spelled - Hello
[ In Reply To ..]OP should change location with this compassionate angel.
You're right. I see parents like that every day. - To the point where their insistance -
[ In Reply To ..]that their oh-so-special little offspring participate in anything and everything going on around them be tolerated, even when it puts the child's safety at risk.
problem with neighbor - MT2
[ In Reply To ..]Funny! Thanks for the chuckle.
I've been your neighbor - I Cant Breathe
[ In Reply To ..]Smoking is disgusting. My ex-neighbors (they ended up getting evicted - thank God) smoked like chimneys out on their back deck, and it went right into my bedroom. IT IS DISGUSTING. There were times at night where I would wake up choking and gagging from it. Besides smoking being gross, it is also low class. You don't see even middle class people, much less the upper middle class, smoking anymore. Aside from the HUGE health issues (smoking killed both my mother and my boss), there's the social and cultural stigma of it nowadays. You are putting your own health in jeopardy by living with that chimney. If he insists on smoking, he should do so only very far away from everybody's house. And change his clothes when he comes back home.
Similar Messages:
Neighbor's Barking DogSep 21, 2011
Does anyone have any suggestions on how to handle a neighbor's barking dog? This is a hound dog who barks incessantly all day long at the house kitty corner to ours. I've left a note at the residence about this and have called animal control when it continued, and he is still at it. I've tried closing up my house and running white noise in my office, but nothing seems to drown him out. It seems talking to them would be pointless at this juncture as they hav ...
Vent About My NeighborSep 23, 2010
Okay, so I have a neighbor who is unemployed. I know this cos he and his other half are always having screaming shouting matches and she yells he doesn't work and doesn't contribute, doesn't drive, eats her food, smokes, won't even watch "her kid", blah, blah, blah. So..what does he do? He goes and gets himself a motorcycle. So he has no license to drive it and it sits there in the yard (not their parking area, but their back yard that faces our back yard) a ...
Getting Frustrated With NeighborJun 30, 2011
I have one grandchild who for the first 3 years of his little life lived too far away for me to visit regularly. Now, my son and family live about 6 hours away and I get the grandson one week every other month and it's been great. I've got a whole room set up, a little backyard kiddie pool, jungle gym, treehouse, the whole thing! (DH is a hobby man and made so much himself!) Anyway, my neighbor has her grandson quite often and has let me know it is because she does n ...
My 7 Yo, A Dog And A Buttinski NeighborMay 20, 2011
My 7 yo was outside last evening playing with 2 other children in the cul-de-sac when a lady walking a dog passed. My 7 yo approached the lady and asked permission to pet the animal, which was granted, but while petting it\'s shoulder the animal\'s head swung around hitting my girl in the eye. She has a small scratch and a bruise under the eye. Everyone around made a huge fuss about it. A neighbor called our apt security rep who came and talked to us. A buttins ...
Need Advice Please...sis-in-law/neighborDec 04, 2013
Ok I need advice on an issue I have with my sister-in-law and brother-in-law. They live next door and constantly need favors of some sort or another in the form of will you pick up my kid from preschool, can we borrow 40$, can you loan us the money to pay our light bill that is cut off, can I borrow a few eggs and can you bring them over, can I borrow sugar, can u watch my kids while I go to town, can u pick me up such and such while you are in town in which case when you get back they don ...
Barking Dog And NeighborFeb 22, 2014
Ok. Here's the story. We have a Golden whom we named Luke Skybarker, and he has lived up to his name in every sense. He will be 12 next month. Five years ago the house next door went up for sale. I was already well aware of Luke's proclivities and when the house was being shown when I was outside I would make mention of this fact for the prospective buyers to take into consideration (no, they old neighbor didn't move out because of him. She died.) &n ...
Neighbor Really Ticking Me Off!!!Apr 05, 2014
Approximately 4 apartments. The landlord provides a washer & dryer because we don't have washer and dryer hook-ups in our apartments. There is me & my husband living in one apartment, one of our daughters live next door, a single guy in another apartment and a couple with a small child in the fourth apt. The single guy is never home and works second shift and my daughter and her boyfriend are hardly home and they both work second shift also. The couple IS constantly and I do mean CONSTA ...
NEIGHBOR ISSUESAug 22, 2015
There are 3 families with young children who live next to me. My children are grown and gone. All of the children like to come to my house, probably because I don't have to discipline them, I'm like a grandmother. Anyway, I will label them family A, B and C. Family A is no longer allowed to play with family B or C - long story. I enjoy having all of the children at my house - I miss having children around. I have never had this problem before and I'm not ...
My Neighbor's Yard Is A Mess!!Nov 10, 2009
We live sort of in the country on a cul-de-sac gravel road. All of the houses are less than 5 years old and sit on 1-1/2 to 3 acre lots. It is beautfil in here with all the big hardwood trees and nice big yards. Everyone keeps their yards mowed and clean EXCEPT of course the one next door to me. Our lot is 1-1/2 acres and his is 3 acres. He mows a strip down where our property lines meet and on the other side of his yard where the property line meets the other neigh ...
Advice About Neighbor Trying To Be HelpfulSep 20, 2016
I am looking for a way to let him know that I am very grateful for his help, but having that kind of noise around is distracting while I am working. I have actually told him this before, but I am not sure he understood that I meant for all time. To top it off, when he's mowing he makes my dogs bark, and of course that is worse than the mowing itself. I usually try to mow before he has a chance to get to it, but with all the rain we've had it is hard to do. I wor ...
How Do You Deal With A Neighbor That Has No Regard For AnyoneJul 16, 2011
How would you deal with a neighbor in a townhouse semidetached type neighborhood who has no regard for anyone at all and they just take over everything. They burn a firepit every night with skids which they shouldnt be and smoke goes in everyones house and ashes all over the cars. They used to have their dog out in other yards and the kids just everywhere doing whatever. They live like they own everything around them. We did put up a fence and that helped some of this but ...
I Am The Worst Neighbor In The WorldApr 13, 2010
If I could buy a cabin in the Rocky Mountains on 40 acres of land, I would. Except I can't. I live in apartments because that is my only financial option (long story, lots of people have a similar one), so I really should try to accept my situation and live a happy life. Except I just want things the way I want things and I believe since I've been single and working from home since 1997, I have become a hermit crab and like it enough I am not motivated to change. My downs ...
So, My Highly Intrusive Neighbor...Oct 09, 2012
She is nosey, in everyone's business and exceptionally bossy. I had thrown away a basket and came home from vacation to a very long voicemail about how she had found the basket, retrieved it and gave it to another neighbor. She then berrated me REPEATEDLY about throwing away things that other people can use, and informed me that she is European (no kidding) and Europeans do not throw beautiful things away. I have no idea how she figured out it was my basket to begin with, but a ...
Halloween Traditions/my Neighbor Told Me I'm Going ToOct 16, 2009
This is kind of a double post so I didn't take up board space! FIRST: I have a new neighbor and we had introduced herself when she moved in and we were all friendly. I recently decorated for H-ween. Nothing too much just a big lighted up pumpkin, an inflatable ghost, and a couple of those wind socks on the porch. Anyway yesterday her and a couple of her church girlfriends came over and knocked on my door. I answered all polite and then she told me that H ...
Loud Cars/Inconsiderate NeighborOct 22, 2014
I know there is nothing anyone can do about the problem, but please allow me to just vent. I live in a neighborhood where the homes are very close together. It's not the greatest area in town, but it works for me. Everyone on the block is quiet, and there is usually no trouble at all. However, the one family across the street consists of a dad (who seems really nice), his daughter and his son. The children are grown and have jobs, but still living at home. ...
Going On A Trip, Next Door Neighbor Talk WithApr 20, 2015
leave my house key with her just in case. I have animals here at home and my husband is home like every other day as far as the watering and feeding things. She and I basically share "her" cat. She lets him be an inside/outside wanderer and he comes to my house and gets treats. I have talked with her occasionally over the years, never visited in her home, she has been in mine once. She is a part-time RN in NICU here at one of our close by hospitals so pretty responsible. I would love to be a ...
New Neighbor Brought Unwanted PestsMay 09, 2017
I am currently saving up for moving, but it has been rough with my income not being enough to cover moving costs. What can be done temporarily to eliminate and keep roaches out of the work computer until I can get moved? I am in no position financially to replace my work computer right now. My new neighbor moved in about two months ago and since a few days after they moved in I have been seeing roaches at my house. I had previously had no problem and have been living here for 10 y ...
Saw My Neighbor Pick Up His Wife And Carry Her InsideApr 18, 2011
I can't remember Hubby ever picking me up maybe, 30 yrs ago when we got married lol! Has your Hubby ever picked you up and carried you wherever? It is very romantic when you think about it. ...
Have A Cat ProblemSep 10, 2010
I recently gave away the last of my momma cat's five kittens and she is now engorged and leaking milk. The babies didn't go all at once--one one week, two the next, etc.--but she is still making milk. She looks uncomfortable but I don't think she has a fever. Will this resolve itself or will she need medical attention (besides the spaying coming up soon!)? Thanks for any suggestions. ...
OMG - I HAVE A PROBLEM!!!Sep 09, 2010
I have a dilemma. I brought in a woman to rent my room on Saturday for 200.00 without a lease. Within 3 hours, the entire house reeked of very strong cinnamon incense. Fine...then comes Sunday, she begins by making coffee in my coffee pot and cleaning my kitchen counters, her first load of clothes goes in at at 9 AM and she washes clothes until late that night. She puts her dish towels in place and takes it upon herself to wash mine. She then finds a Sun-T ...
Here Comes Our Next ProblemMay 21, 2010
South Korea Holds Emergency Security Meeting. South Korea's president convened an emergency national security meeting Friday, a day after an official report concluded that North Korea was responsible for the deadly sinking of a naval patrol ship. North Korea, for its part, spoke of war for a second straight day, while U.S. Secretary of State Hillary Rodham Clinton was on the way to the region and tensions on the Korean peninsula were expected to dominate her agenda. South Korea accused N ...
Here's My Problem With Jan 14, 2014
for example, we have people today posting on the MM board that they cherry pick and that if we were smart, we'd do it to. We have people who post that if I get my feelings hurt by something posted on these forums, it's because I'm too sensitive (certainly not because what they said is too harsh, oh no!). Bet you anything these people claim to be Christian. It's okay though because they believe. They got their get out of jail free card. They' ...
This Is A ProblemApr 23, 2017
Wow....freedom of religion, no discrimination based on race... these people need to live in a country without our constitution http://www.salon.com/2017/03/10/trump-supporters-call-for-liberal-genocide-and-deportation-of-jews-at-arizona-rally_partner/ ...
Am I Expecting Too Much...What Is My Problem?Feb 12, 2011
I feel myself sliding into a horrible depression and I honestly don't know why. I've never been depressed before in my life except for fleeting circumstantial incidents that resolved within a few days but I just can't shake this. What confuses me is I don't know WHY I'm depressed. I'm married to a wonderful, beautiful guy who treats me like a queen. We have a very nice little life together, albeit not with a huge amount of financial freedom. ...
The Real ProblemSep 07, 2011
For since the creation of the world God’s invisible qualities—his eternal power and divine nature—have been clearly seen, being understood from what has been made, so that men are without excuse. For although they knew God, they neither glorified him as God nor gave thanks to him, but their thinking became futile and their foolish hearts were darkened. Although they claimed to be wise, they became fools and exchanged the glory of the immortal God for images made to look like mortal man ...
I Have A Mouse ProblemMay 12, 2011
I have a mouse, or maybe I should say mice, problem. I've been setting snap traps, caught three and now the traps don't get tripped and the bait is eaten. I have poision out under the kitchen appliances. I have grandchildren who come over sometimes and don't want anything harmful to them, although it isn't like they play under the fridge and stove anyway and I so far they have not visited with traps out. What can I do? If anyone has any advice, p ...
Problem With AntsSep 09, 2010
Anybody have any ideas what to do about ants? They are only in my daighter\\\'s room, nowhere else. Please help!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ...
Weight Problem - Help!May 04, 2010
I am hoping some of you out there can help. I am 5'4" and weigh 108 pounds. I would like to gain 10 or 12 pounds so I look healthier. Some people look at me like I either have a drug problem or I am bulemic, and that is SO not the case. It is to the point I am getting very self-conscious about it and even getting to the point that I don't feel comfortable with my husband seeing me. The problem is that I do not have an appetite a lot of ...
Dental ProblemJul 30, 2010
Has anyone ever undergone a dental procedure and had to have a bone graft? I have to and am not looking forward to it. Sounds horrible. ...
OK, Anyone Else Having A Gnat Problem?Jul 23, 2010
OMG! The gnats are driving me insane! Anyone else having this problem? I can't figure out where/why/how they're getting in but it's making me crazy! Solutions?? Thanks :) ...