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Friend has live in boyfriend who sleeps on one
Posted: Aug 20, 2015
who is in the 2nd grade on the other side. Any thoughts on this? I told her I did not think such a good idea. ;
Better than sleeping in the bathtub. - MYOB
[ In Reply To ..]My thoughts would be to MYOB. Maybe they can't afford two beds.
here is what I think - you asked, I answered
[ In Reply To ..]It is none of your darn business!
Only thing, when we discussed it she said - to ask what others thought if okay.
[ In Reply To ..]She knows I come here with predominately other females and talk so she asked me and I told her okay, would ask. She said she thought probably others do the same with kids sleeping with them.
If she said to ask ... - sm
[ In Reply To ..]If she said to ask, you should have said so in your original post.
This looks like another "need advice" post from that person who asks about controversial family problems of people she knows, but who argues about the advice once it is given. Either that or someone else has started writing like her ("told her ok, would ask" "did not think such a good idea").
From the original poster, I am not needing - advice but the friend's mother
[ In Reply To ..]lives with her and is very upset that this is going on. I have never spent the night with my friend and really do not know what their sleeping arrangements are. I did not know had to follow a particular form in order to ask question but thanks for informing me.
I think that is dumb - see msg
[ In Reply To ..]I think that is ridiculous. No boundaries. And if they are being intimate in front of the kid, that's badder than bad. If they think the kid wouldn't wake up during all that, they're delusional.
I think it depends on the child's age - no name
[ In Reply To ..]i had kids that would sometimes wake up in the night and crawl in bed w me and my bf (at that time). They were really young, but it is not a good idea to do this every night. Not just because of the bf but because that child will grow too dependent on it and it will be harder to get her/him in their own bed as they get older. Why don't she just lay down with her/him till she falls asleep and then get in your own bed? That's what I did when mine were small.
No not a good idea for many reasons - sm - Anon123
[ In Reply To ..]My DH slept with my daughter for years (no nothing funny going on) as my DD had trouble sleeping, then at some point she moved in to sleep with me (due to her getting older and it was not too cool to have her sleeping with her dad, and I did not want some uptight idiot calling CPS), this went on for a couple years (me and DH do not sleep together as we both snore and wake each other up, impossible for us to get a good night's sleep together). It took me quite a while to get her back into her own room in her own bed alone, she was 11 or 12 by then. My DH went to the couch at that point (he'd been sleeping in her room when she slept with me). So unless they want a kid that won't sleep alone, then they should continue what they are doing, but the earlier they get her out of their bed and into her own the better. It is way too much co-dependence. I was actually sad when she went to sleep on her own, but I knew it was not healthy for either of us. My DH has been trying to sleep with me more, still ends up on the couch most nights at some point in the night due to my snoring. DD is now fine on her own, loves her room, got her all new furniture last year too, has a nice set up in there.
.
So tell your friend to cut the apron strings, put her in her own room if there is one available, or convert a room/area to a bedroom, make it her own private space, a place that is just hers. She can always still cuddle with mom every now and then, but time to get her sleeping alone. This will also help her relationship with her BF unless she does not want to improve that for some reason, if that is the case then break up with BF and either move out or have him move out.
It is a 2nd grade boy, not a girl, sleeps in - bed with mom/her boyfriend
[ In Reply To ..]She has another child, a boy, in first grade that sleeps in the same room. She tells me she is getting bunk beds for them but did not say where those would be. She tells me her mother fusses with her all the time about her sleeping arrangement.
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