GET OUT - Before - You become a statistic! Posted: Aug 21st, 2018 - 6:01 pm In Reply to: Three days later and I hope you listened and considered - all of these excellent advice....
Are you living in his home or he in yours? Even though my ex (late) boyfriend was living in MY house, I couldn't kick him out because he had lived with me for more than 6 months and it was his residence. He threatened me with scissors (jabbed holes in my bathroom counter), a machete (ran the flat part across my throat, forehead and head and jabbed holes in my front door and some walls), shot holes in the outside wall of my trailer with a pellet gun)and became physically/sexually abusive. I have no doubt that he may have injured or killed me at some point, or my children and grandchildren.
It got to the point where my then 16 yo son was looking for our shotgun that he knew was in his closet. Thankfully I had moved it and he couldn't find it or the situation could have ruined his life. He did go to school and one of his teachers asked how he was or what was wrong and he told her. Of course, she called DCF and/or the police. I had 3 police officers at my door that night and someone from DCF met him at school 2 days later. Thankfully nothing happened with my son, but I had to file a 3rd restraining order (let him come back after the first 2) and finally was able to get him out of my home.
He moved back to where he originally came from, continued to drink and landed up in the hospital (2nd time for the ascites and other end-stage related issues in alcoholics) and was placed on hospice. He came back to the area where I lived and was supposed to be taken care of by one of his brothers and his GF, but she kicked him out after a couple weeks. I had a small camper I let him move into (not back in my house) where he lived for less than a year and ended up in a hospice facility where he passed away last July.
He literally drank himself to death. He had real talent as a construction worke and was able to work on older cars, basically a handyman/jack of all trades. He was a hard worker and a perfectionist, so did a good job on whatever he worked on. He did go and took a GED program and passed the GED on his 1st try...after being out of school for 30 years. He even got the opportunity to go to a local community college to take their HVAC course and he could have done that and been certified, but alcohol was his demon and he couldn't/wouldn't let it go.
I knew better, but I thought I could love away his past hurts, deceits and losses and I could help him heal and get sober for good. I didn't want to give up on him and I loved him, but he almost caused me to basically lose my son. Now I have the guilt of allowing things to get to that point.
PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE...enlist the help of friends, family, clergy, etc. and do what it takes to get out or get him removed from your home with somewhere else to stay until he (hopefully) is no longer a threat, if he becomes threatening. All of the other posters have given good suggestions/advice, so hopefully something will be helpful to you.
Please keep us posted to let us know you are safe. I know many will be keeping you in their thought and prayers.
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