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Sister in law expecting her first baby. oh boy

Posted: Oct 28, 2013

First off she's kind of gross even though she's an RN. Think Duck Dynasty/Honey Boo Boo. She's a tom boy. My grandmother and mother have both told me she is adamnant that her child is a boy. Now she is saying on facebook if she has a girl she will make her a tom boy like she is. They find out on Wednesday what they are having. part of me wants her to have a girl just so she can see you can't make a child be like you no matter how hard you want it to be so. On the other hand I don't know I would want my niece to be subjected to this woman's influences because i'm not sure just how far she will take it. So I too am hoping for a boy so it will be saved from this slob either not loving her or forcing her will on her.

Ugh thanks for letting me vent. I can't put that on facebook or tell anyone other than my husband, who feels exactly the same way. She makes my brother happy but she is the most bossy, classless person I have ever met. Just glad she is my sister and law and not my daughter in law!! UGH

I will let you guys know what she is having when i find out ;)

;

Wow - hmm

[ In Reply To ..]
I'm so glad YOU are not my sis-in-law.

why? I've not said any of this to her. I'm sure she has her fair share - of things to say about me

[ In Reply To ..]
i'm stuck up, too girlie, etc. But she's not said this to me. I get along with her fine it's just I can't understand why anyone would just flat out say they didn't want a girl and put on facebook how they hope everybody is wrong and they just have to have a boy.

Like I said I was just venting. I would never hurt my brother by saying any of this to her. Plus it's not anything my mother hasn't said to me. She's worried to. I guess if you aren't in the situation it is hard to understand.

Thanks for listening.

Preference - Another Mom

[ In Reply To ..]
My first child was a boy. I was adamant and spoke out very loudly that I did not want another boy when I found out I was pregnant again. (Thank goodness I had 2 girls after that!) There wasn't FaceBook back then or I probably would have put it out there too!

Why would it be so bad if her daughter is a tomboy? My youngest daughter who is 11 is VERY much a tomboy and does not like girly things at all. I don't see a problem with it.

It's not your child so why are your panties all in a bunch over something you have absolutely no say so about or control over? Not enough on your plate to deal with?

oh i dont mind the tomboy part its the assertion of the will - implied

[ In Reply To ..]
I wanted girls too but had boys and was very happy with them.

I just worry that the child will be berated if she picks girl toys or will not be allowed to wear pink even if she wants to. This is her first child so i'm not sure what her parenting style will be. By the way, my son wanted a hello kitty house as a toddler so I bought him one. I'm cool with that. He's 10 and totally into skateboarding all that. However if he wanted to continue to go down the Hello Kitty path that would have been ok too.

Never understood why people get so hostile on here. geez louise.

we're hostile? pfft - how rude

[ In Reply To ..]
Didnt you vent with your husband and mother. You needed to come to a public forum and put that out there, which is extremely rude and nasty. First of all, I dnot' remember seeing any tomboy, nasty slobs on Duck Dynasty. All the ladies there are very well put together. Honey Boo Boo on the other hand, I could agree there as far as their apeparance, but on both those shows, the ladies on those shows are loving, caring, and considerate, unlike you apparently!

ok you win i'm a horrible human being - happy?

[ In Reply To ..]
jeez

it's not a contest - how rude

[ In Reply To ..]
I guess Im reacting to all this crap on the internet lately how people hide behind their computers and say whatever the heck they want, I'm guilty of that apparently from my response to you - I'm realizing that but I think if you were my friend, I would tell you, but anyway, just please be kind to each other and love your sister-in-law as best you can. I know you said you would never hurt them to their face but you did it behind their backs and still not so nice. Sorry for being rude myself. Wish you the best.

thanks :) - soon to be auntie

[ In Reply To ..]
x

Because MTs are now bored women out of work - For the most part

[ In Reply To ..]
Sorry, but that's just the truth. You have a ton of bored, irritated, broke women who have nothing better to do than sit on this board, while waiting for work, and pick out every flaw they can with others.

I understood COMPLETELY what you were saying. The woman is basically saying "If I can't get my boy, I will make a girl be my boy". Regardless if she, herself is a tomboy, none of us can determine the personality of our children. Hopefully she just gets a healthy baby and maybe she will be happy enough with that.

that is what i am hoping for. I was born with a heart defect - Anxious Auntie

[ In Reply To ..]
called tetrology of fallot. I don't think she has even brought this up to her OB even though I have mentioned this to her. very slim chance that her baby would have it but worth mentioning. I guess that's why i just can't understand why anyone would place such importance on sex rather than health. I actually had a positive AFP on my first, turned out to be false positive but there were tons of tears let me tell you. That plus worrying about his heart I didn't care if it was a boy or a girl as long as he came out healthy.

Agree! Never complain about what you have... - clb

[ In Reply To ..]
I'm not agreeing with the OP but with your post. Preggo SIL should be happy and thankful for A) getting pregnant, B) staying pregnant and C) having a healthy baby regardless of boy or girl. I'd give anything to be able to get pregnant. I absolutely HATE anyone complaining about their pregnancy and/or babies/kids. Wanna trade my life? My time and thousands of dollars spent to get pregnant with nothing to show for it?

Pardon me if I don't care about the SIL (no disrespect to you dear OP). I'm just irritated by her wanting a boy so bad, be happy with what you get!

Wow. - nm

[ In Reply To ..]
.

I see your point and agree! - Trampled underfoot

[ In Reply To ..]
I never understood the mentality of people who figured they "had" to have one sex or the other. Plus I always thought, what will that child think when they find out that their mother announced flat-out that they didn't want them unless they were the desired sex? I think that would be very painful to the child.

I had 3 boys and I was never disappointed; had it been 3 girls, I would have felt the same.

Please do let us know what the ultrasound says. I'll be curious to hear.

exactly. If i knew my mother was heart set on a boy - i would have always felt like a disappointment

[ In Reply To ..]
:(

Same here! - Trampled underfoot

[ In Reply To ..]
I was a sensitive child and I know I would have been crushed.

I forgot to mention...they wont even consider picking out - girl names

[ In Reply To ..]
x

that's bizarre - sm

[ In Reply To ..]
so what're they going to do when they find out they're having a girl?

no clue. Im sure they will come around eventually - just never met anybody like her

[ In Reply To ..]
that's what has me perplexed.

Why don't you wait to see her parenting skills - before you judge?

[ In Reply To ..]
Seems pointless to me to judge her parenting before the child is even out of the womb.

good point. Maybe i am having aunt anxiety! - dunno i have never been one before

[ In Reply To ..]
this is new to me too :)

you are proof of why... - sm

[ In Reply To ..]
In-laws suck! I feel for your sister in law facing so much judgment from you women.

I accept this criticism and all others. This will help me grow as a person - thanks

[ In Reply To ..]
you are right, my opening statements were petty and judgmental. My bottom line is concern for the new life being brought into the world. I will tone it down from now on.

Thanks again.

Don't worry so much about this - Your SIL will LOVE her baby

[ In Reply To ..]
It's funny, before we have children, we have all these ideas. But then the baby comes, and the baby is SO much more wonderful than we could possibly have imagined. You and your SIL are both going to love and enjoy this baby, either way,and neither of you are going to want one single thing changed about the baby. If your SIL has six or so children and they are girls, then the two of you (and her husband of course) will all be rooting for a boy. But just enjoy this new baby, it is a wonderful experience.

very true. thanks for putting it into perspective for me - Anxious Auntie

[ In Reply To ..]
x

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