A community of 30,000 US Transcriptionist serving Medical Transcription Industry

How would you handle this?

Posted: Aug 6, 2013

My family and I are going on vacation with my sisters and their husbands next week - 4 couples and 4 kids. I love getting together with my sisters because we don't do it often enough. The sister who arranges these things is so excited about the trip. She has a heart of gold and I only want to please her, but I am dreading it because of her husband. He is very nasty, says very inappropriate things in front of my children, and frequently makes snide comments about me and my husband to our faces. My sister has a handful of stress-induced ailments because she has to live with him and cope with him, and she spends a lot of time covering for him by saying things like, "now don't get mad; he's just kidding." Well, he isn't -- he is just miserable and needs a scapegoat. My husband says that the minute he becomes inappropriate and we don't like it, we should just leave and go on our own vacation. If we do that, my sister and my kids will get upset, and I don't want to hurt anybody, but I'm not spending hundreds of dollars and travelling 6 hours to spend a week being picked on. It is possible the BIL will behave himself to please my sister, but I want to be prepared. Would you grin and bear it or would you pick up and leave? Would you do something entirely different?

;

Have You or Your Husband Addressed This? - If Not, Why?

[ In Reply To ..]
Your sister chooses this.

Her kids don't--and neither do you, your husband and your kids.

As a rule, potty-mouths can be firmly and polity reminded that ladies/children are present. They either hush or say, "Aw, they've heard it before," but--as a rule--they rein themselves in.

Bullies are cowards.

(Just a thought: Does this guy drink?)

He doesn't drink. He might actually - formerMT

[ In Reply To ..]
be nicer if he did. He is definitely a bully. My sister won't leave him because he says he would kill her and anyone she dates. He is one of those "survivor" types, an avid hunter/poacher, in or out of season. I have seen him run over stray dogs. He shot my cat to death when I was a kid. Shot his own dog in the head when it was having uncontrollable seizures -- wouldn't even bring it to the vet to put it down. Just mean to the bone. My sister tries to cope as best she can, as does the rest of the family.

If he hurts animals, it's only a matter of time before - he hurts your sister, if hes not already. nm

[ In Reply To ..]

I have grown up with this. He and my sister - formerMT

[ In Reply To ..]
got together when she was 13 or something, and I was the baby and always picked on, especially by him. Dysfunctional family dynamics being what they were, no one ever reigned him in or protected me, so the trend continued. My husband is a pacifist by nature and could care less what this guy thinks of us. He would just as soon avoid him, but I got us into this trip so it's my fault for agreeing. The BIL is nice to my kids I wouldn't leave him alone with him, though. I'm surprised his own kid lived to adulthood.

Now that I see it in print, it sounds like a bad - formerMT

[ In Reply To ..]
TV drama. I will come to an agreement with my hubby about what we will and will not tolerate on the trip, and come up with a plan for extricating ourselves, without being confrontational. Maybe something like, "Well that was nice, but it seems we must be going. See you all at Christmas." Christmas isn't much fun, either, come to think of it. Thanks for steering my thinking in the right direction. I will do what is right for my little family and if I have to keep leaving, that is what I will do. Maybe BIL will keep his thoughts to himself next time.

Bullies back down if - xx

[ In Reply To ..]
you stand up to them. You don't want to hurt your sister, but she is aiding and abetting his bad behavior by passing it off as "kidding." Face him down when he gets out of line and let him know it is inappropriate and you will not tolerate it. When your sister claims he's kidding, call her on it. Let her know she's not fooling you one bit. You do not have to tolerate abuse. You seem to care very much about your sister, but she doesn't seem to have any consideration for you or your family if she excuses her husband's appalling behavior and takes his side.

If you don't like the way you're being treated, pack up and leave. If Christmas is uncomfortable because of the nasty BIL, do not include him in your celebrations any more. Life is too short to spend any of it with mean people. Your sister needs to face the fact that he husband is a problem. Maybe being left out of family celebrations will be the spark she needs to kick him to the curb.

You are right. I have been tempted to - formerMT

[ In Reply To ..]
call my sister on it, and I will. This enabling behavior of hers comes naturally to her b/c my dad was verbally and physically abusive but she loved him anyway. I was happy when he finally died 25 years ago, but I have spent years kicking myself for not standing up for myself. I try to stand up for myself in all situations but I have avoided doing it in this case b/c I didn't want to hurt my sister. Maybe this will be her wake-up call. I hate to stress her out more, but she has to learn to deal with the biggest stressor in her life, her husband.

Nasty BIL - sm

[ In Reply To ..]
People who don't feel good about themselves often degrade others, because that is the only thing that makes them feel better. If I were you, I would dish back to him just what he was dishing to me. If he makes a smart comment to you or your husband, smart right back off at him, then smile pleasantly so that he thinks he didn't even bother you. If he says things in front of your kids that is inappropriate, chastise him about it, tell him that at his age you would THINK he would know proper manners around kids, but since he obviously wasn't taught, you feel you should point it out.

I know that two wrongs don't make a right, but if he is getting his rocks off and making himself feel better by insulting others, then it's only logical that he would stop if he is no longer being made to feel good about it. Don't feel bad for your sister, she obviously knows he's like this and she chooses to live with it. I would just tell her that you know SHE is willing to put up with his behavior, but you're not and that's that.

It would just escalate if I responded to his - formerMT

[ In Reply To ..]
remarks, and I don't want to get into a verbal sparring match. And I don't think well when I'm upset. He is pretty smart for a caveman, and I would lose. I'd also upset the rest of the family.

You are right about my sister. She chooses to put up with his behavior, but I will choose NOT to. Thanks!

abusive BIL - anon

[ In Reply To ..]
Be careful with confrontation. This man is abusive and dangerous. Anyone who would shoot an animal you should be very wary off. Keep in mind that his is the behavior he shows publicly. Imagine what he's like when he's home and no one else sees it. I would pack up without explanation and leave. Confrontation only feeds someone who's abusive. If you want to see them on holidays that's fine but the same rules apply. Quietly pack up and leave. You sister is putting up with WAY more at home than she is telling you. These types of people don't change and trying to "teach him a lesson" could seriously backfire. Most of all you need to set an example for your children that abuse is not tolerated and is not love. His children will have learned that abuse in a relationship is normal and there's not much you can do about that, but you can use this as a teachable moment for your children. If he becomes physical or threatening call the police - don't hesitate!!! Abusers continue as long as they have someone who'll put up with it and it sounds like your sister has decided to do just that. Please, please just nonconfrontationally leave. An argument could easily escalate. Take it from someone who's been with an abuser! Read some info on abusive traits in abusers. I'm betting he has a LOT of them.

Yeah. He has this deep-seated anger, I - formerMT

[ In Reply To ..]
think toward his mom, but he takes it out on everyone else, mostly women. He has been in trouble with the law since he was a teenager, but always finds a way out. He gets involved in these road rage incidents, someone gets his plate number, the cops come to the house and freak out my sister and where is the BIL? He has parked his car and gone off into the woods hunting or fishing. Hiding, the coward. He never has to pay the piper. He is not someone you want to tick off. I think he dreams about revenge.

This situation has the potetial to become violent, - even deadly, to your sister. :(

[ In Reply To ..]
What you're describing in your posts sounds like all the classic warning signs of spousal abuse:

* Control freak
* Animal abuse
* Verbal abuse & belittling
* Road rage
* Trouble with the law
* Owns a gun
* Mother/women issues
* No accountability/blames others
* Rage escalates with confrontation

Your sister keeps enabling him and making excuses for him because she is AFRAID of him. I would put her in touch with groups that help women in such circumstances. She might want to consider leaving him. She's in a tough spot: Staying with him might well become dangerous; yet leaving him would also be dangerous.

I CAN'T STAND men like this.

UGH. I was with a man like this for 14 - years.

[ In Reply To ..]
When I did leave him, I was afraid for my life. He stalked me, my family, my friends, and even my BOSS.

I left him when I was out of state b/c I was afraid of his reaction, and I'm glad I did. He destroyed all of my belongings, right down to my last pair of socks. Every single thing I had was gone.

After months of me changing my phone numbers and email addresses and removing all social networking, he finally LEFT THE COUNTRY and I have been free ever since.

Please tell your sister to talk to the police if she is afraid of her husband. NO ONE should have to live in a state of fear. I did it for far too long and it destroyed not only my things, but also my psyche, and my own body was eating itself up from the stress. I hope she can find a way out of this relationship, I really do. I'm so sorry. :(

Thanks. I'm sorry for you, too. Her leaving - formerMT

[ In Reply To ..]
him is not in the cards, I'm afraid. There are just too many ways he can hurt her. Her body is definitely eaten up by stress. She has developed this autoimmune disorder where she has developed sarcoids in her lungs and limbs. She has IBS or something like that where she has to run to the bathroom when she gets nervous. She overeats, and the steroids she has to take for her other ailments are making her get bigger and bigger. He had cancer a while back and, God forgive me, I would have been happy for her sake if he had succumbed to it. But evil lasts forever, it seems. I know that sounds harsh.

Sometimes we are just - that desperate for freedom.

[ In Reply To ..]
If her partner dying seems like the only way for her to escape, it's only natural for you to hope she gets that chance. I get it. I really do. I'm not afraid to admit, I've had those fantasies myself. You want freedom and by any means possible. I would obviously preferred *not* to have anyone have to die for that to happen, but if he had died--I would have been relieved and I think my family would have, too.

Again, I'm just very sorry your sister, and also for you because this affects your life too. I can only imagine that your sister worries about her family constantly and how this is affecting her relationship with you. It's a terrible situation for everyone (except the jerk, of course. They always have it easy!).

An idea - anon

[ In Reply To ..]
Instead of completely leaving when he becomes inappropriate, would there be a way for you just to leave the immediate area? For example, if you all are outside and he's trying to start problems, could you just pick up and walk inside?

Frankly, I think you're rather brave for even entertaining the idea of going. I understand you love your sisters and want to spend time with them, but I, personally, would have huge reservations about subjecting my children to a person like your bil.

He is nice to my kids, but I don't trust him - formerMT

[ In Reply To ..]
alone with them. I normally go in the other room or walk away when we have to be together as a family. But we are going to be 12 people packed into a little cabin. I told my sister I was going to pitch a tent and sleep outside but she wouldn't hear of it. I'm bringing the tent anyway. We may just take off and go stay at a campground and I can meet my sisters for coffee or drinks in town at night.

I would give it right back to him. - sm

[ In Reply To ..]
He does this to feel better about himself. I wouldn't leave or grin and bear it, I would give it to him straight up. When he says something inappropriate reply with sarcasm. Just explain to your sister that his behavior will no longer be tolerated. People only get away with this type of behavior if we let them, so refuse to let him. I would nail him on every nasty comment.

I found this - it may help

[ In Reply To ..]
Most of what I've heard about dealing with this type of person it to call family meetings, discuss feelings, but somehow, I don't see this guy agreeing to such a thing. This may help.

Dealing With Adult Bullies
I was just reading an advice column on the Psychology Today website about how to handle an adult bully. The 42-year-old woman who sent in her question wanted to know how to address her female neighbor who was calling her nasty names at a party. The advice given was to ignore the woman.

UGH!!! Really? Ignore her? Since when does ignoring a bully help? How is it helpful to stay silent to mistreatment? I can’t tell you how much advice like this grates on me.
Women, please, do NOT stay silent or ignore mistreatment. In fact, the best way to ensure continued mistreatment is to ignore it. When we stay silent in the face of disrespect or abuse, we send the message that this treatment is okay. Implicit in our silence is acceptance.

Here’s how to handle a bully:

1. Do NOT silence. If someone is bullying you, stand up to it. If your neighbor or colleague is saying hurtful things to you, STAND UP for yourself. Do not yell, scream or go crazy on the person—effectively stand up. Be clear that what they’re saying is not okay. Tell them the conversation will be over if they can’t speak to you respectfully and then follow through and end the conversation.

2. Do not cower. If someone threatens you, be clear that if they threaten you again you will report them to the police...or to your boss if it’s work related. Don’t back down and don’t allow their threat scare you into submitting.

3. Address the issue on the spot. Often bullies say things in front of a large group and count on your not saying anything. Don’t cooperate. If they call you out or make an obnoxious comment in a meeting—have your own back and address the comment. Hold a figurative mirror up to the person: “Wow, that was a cheap shot” or “That was a pretty rude comment.” Be sure that you are respectful when you do this.

4. Stay grounded. When you respond, make sure you do so from a very healthy, centered place. You are trying to set a limit and stand up for yourself; you are not trying to seek revenge. Do not stoop to their level or your response will be ineffective.
5. Use excellent boundaries. When you are in a bully’s space, know their behavior is about them and not about you. Hold yourself in warm regard even in the face of their obnoxious, mean-spirited behavior.

When it comes to bullies, they have many unresolved issues that they have not addressed or been willing to look at. Know that. Do not take personally their treatment of you. Make sure that you are not making yourself an easy target by just taking the bad treatment. If you do, you will be like a bully-attracting magnet. Speak up for yourself, set limits and be clear you will not take bullying lying down.

Challenge: If there’s a bully in your life, ask yourself if you’ve been standing up or stepping down in the face of their behavior. Commit to stepping up and addressing the behavior directly. Even if they get angrier, be proud of yourself for having your back. Don’t allow their anger to result in your cowering.

I agree with the poster who says he's doing it to your sister, too.nm - been there done that

[ In Reply To ..]
nm

I don't think he is physically abusive to - formerMT

[ In Reply To ..]
her but he does "tease" her a lot. I know she gets mad and yells at him sometimes, but mostly she stands up for him. When he allowed his unleashed dog to attack my leashed dog (we were visiting from out of state), I called him a forking redneck when he left, and she must have told him because he said something to me about it.

"Teasing", or verbal abuse? Often they are - one and the same.

[ In Reply To ..]
X

Skip ahead, and just go on your own vacation. Forget it. - wheres_my_job

[ In Reply To ..]
Don't even bother trying to make things work. Be a wakeup call for your sister. It's NOT right how he's behaving. Draw some boundaries and stick with them. You have a right to happiness. Life is short. Be a good role model for your sister, set your boundaries.

I keep asking the kids, ages 10 and 14, if - formerMT

[ In Reply To ..]
they really want to go, and they do. The 14yo will hang out with his 16yo and 20yo cousins. The 10yo loves to fish with the nasty BIL, so I feel like I'm stuck going. So basically, I'm going for the kids' sake but I will avoid him as much as possible.

your 14-yo will be hanging out with 20-yo cousins? - sm

[ In Reply To ..]
And your 10-yo will be fishing with a man who shot your cat?

I don't think it's appropriate to "keep asking" your kids if they "really want to go". You need to make your own decisions as an adult (and as a parent!) without telegraphing your own conflicts to your children.

I hope that the 10-yo will not be alone with BIL. I would think twice before letting my 14-yo hang out with 20-yo cousins, particularly if their dad is abusive and has a history of killing animals. Do you really know these kids as well as you think you do?

The cousins aren't from the bad BIL. - formerMT

[ In Reply To ..]
They are from the great BIL. Scoutmaster, etc. The 20yo is an Eagle Scout majoring in history and has probably outgrown my kids now that he has a girlfriend, etc. The 17yo girl has always been close with my son for some reason. They like the same music, etc. They don't get to see a lot of each other. The girl is going off to college soon so she will probably drift away from him, too :-(

If some creep shot my cat, my kids wouldn't be - fishing with him, theyd be helping me....

[ In Reply To ..]
bury him out in the woods.

(The BIL, I mean..., not the cat.) - ;D

[ In Reply To ..]

Whoa, whoa, whoa!!! - anon

[ In Reply To ..]
Lemme get this straight...

You have a supposed nasty, pos bil who has been nasty to you since you were a kid, has a history of killing animals, bullies the adults around him, has (according to you) THREATENED TO KILL YOUR SISTER, and you're going to let you 10-year-old CHILD go fishing with the guy 'cause he not only likes your kids, but it will make your 10-year-old sad to be told No?

What the What.

You've called your sister crazy -- you might want to look in a mirror.

Barring that, I'm starting to think the issue isn't as grave as you have made it sound.

Btw-I'm a mamam of 3 kids. My kids' SAFETY will always come before their HAPPINESS, especially when it's a situation I can control.

No. My hubby will be with my son - formerMT

[ In Reply To ..]
whenever they fish. One of the other BIL will be as well. The guys go fishing, the girls walk or go sightseeing.

Thought - anon

[ In Reply To ..]
I have a feeling that there really is no issue with your brother-in-law and that you're exaggerating the circumstances.

I wish, but think what you like. All I asked - formerMT

[ In Reply To ..]
for was advice on how to handle him and his remarks in close quarters. Somehow, the train got off its tracks and I gave further details when asked specific questions. I didn't ask for help getting my sister away from him or keeping my kids safe from him. I know I can't do the former but I am doing the latter.

But..... he shot your cat. :( - >^..^<

[ In Reply To ..]

The situation doesn't sound good. But she might be - dismissing the seriousness of it -

[ In Reply To ..]
because she doesn't want to face the reality of it.

formerMT - Hmmm. sm

[ In Reply To ..]
I would let sis know ahead of time that if BIL acts up, my family and I will be gone. If BIL does act up, say something like, "Okay, had enough of that *bleep*" and up and leave. Again, this is what *I* would do, but don't know the dynamics in your family and how everyone else would respond to you doing that. Now that I think about it, what do your other sisters and BILs think about the way you are treated? Does anyone come to your defense? I would have a hard time not saying something to him or the group if I witnessed a family member or friend being targeted. Again, that's me, sitting outside your actual situation. IMHO, the guy sounds psycho, so you may need to handle things much differently.

I have told two of my sisters that I am going - formerMT

[ In Reply To ..]
to hand him his butt the next time he steps out of line, and they probably passed that on to the other sister. I never thought about my sisters coming to my defense; it has never happened and now I wonder why. Maybe because of the way my father was, we have all learned to sort of fly under the radar around dangerous people? Good question for a therapist some day, I think.

Several ways to handle this - sm - XXX

[ In Reply To ..]
1) Don't go.
2) He starts being a prick CALL him on it, nip it in the bud, tell him he is being a total A-hole and for him to shut up and leave. Bully's usually back down when confronted. But if he won't leave or back down, then you exit room and take your family out for the day. My DH is not an abusive A-hole though at times he can be a total D***head, I tell him when he is and it usually rectifies the situation, when he continues I just leave the room and disengage.
3) If he gets out of control call the cops, even if he is only yelling or screaming, but especially if he gets physical with you or any of the kids or his wife or any pets...maybe a night is jail would help him, who knows.
4) Avoid him like the plague while on trip.
5) Work on your sister, she has to get out for the sake of her kids, later in life they will hate her guts for not having had the balls to stand up for herself and get out....that is presuming she is still alive and not dead at the hands of her lovely husband. Call some abuse hotlines, find out her options, help her get an escape plan in place, she is too much under his thumb and will never leave, obviously does not think she deserves better than to be treated so horribly.

Good luck.

I'm definitely not going next year, so this - formerMT

[ In Reply To ..]
will be the last summer we do this. I'm not telling the kids the next time the subject comes up. I do plan to avoid him and if he is a butthead, I will probably leave, but not before letting my sister know what is going on. Fortunately for my sister, her only child is now out of the house. She works with a bunch of surgeons who worship the ground she walks on and show her so much respect, will only work with her, etc. I keep hoping she will fall in love with one of them and leave the husband. She deserves so much better.

Why can't she leave her husband? - Is it a legal thing?

[ In Reply To ..]
Does he have some dirt on her or something? If so, I'd seriously weigh accepting the consequences of whatever might happen legally against a lifetime sentence of being married to an a-hole.

He has threatened to kill her and whomever - formerMT

[ In Reply To ..]
she leaves him for. And I really think she thinks she loves him. Crazy, I know.

Step 1: Shrink. - Step 2: Police.

[ In Reply To ..]
She really needs to talk to a psychiatrist, if she loves a man who has threatened to kill her if she leaves. I suggested the psychiatrist before the police, because she'll never call the police unless she gets her act together mentally.

the only thing crazy here - sm

[ In Reply To ..]
is your decision to share your vacation with them. I'm sorry. I know you love your sister, but this man is dangerous and you are taking children with you.

This is the last year. Only for 5 days or so. - formerMT

[ In Reply To ..]
Unless he acts up, in which case it may only be a few hours. In the future, I will decline, telling my sisters I would rather it be just us girls. My 14yo doesn't have anything to do with the bad BIL. The 10yo will have my hubby with him at all times b/c my hubby doesn't like the BIL, either. He is annoyed that I agreed, but we have talked about how to handle it and he has agreed that we will just leave but tell my sister why before we go.

Famous last words........ - NMsg

[ In Reply To ..]
X

Sounds like the Stockholm syndrome. - NMsg

[ In Reply To ..]
X

Dude, that hurt my feelings. Did you mean to? - Nik

[ In Reply To ..]
Every time he says something, respond in a sincere voice with: "Dude, that hurt my feelings. Did you mean to hurt my feelings?"

Say it every single time.

Every. Single. Time.

When your response completely ignores what he has said and rather focuses on *him* and his behavior, he will stop doing this.

This works very well if you can keep your cool and not fight fire with fire.

I like that! Especially useful in situations - formerMT

[ In Reply To ..]
where I can't immediately leave, for one reason or another.

Similar Messages:

Jan 03, 2012
I feel so stupid. I just had an interview for a job and met with two different people. The first person I have her name and e-mail address but the second person I only have her first name and forgot to get an e-mail address for her. How would you go about getting this persons e-mail in order to send a thank you note? As I was driving away I realized this and I feel absolutely ridiculous. I thought about waiting until tomorrow and then calling the main desk and askin ...

Aug 05, 2010
I am looking for opinions on what you would do if the following happened to you. I have suffered from a rare medical condition since 2001. Initially I underwent an operation to remove a pituitary adenoma and within a year of that had to two revascularization procedures (STA-MCA bypasses) due to my internal carotid arteries being occluded from an inflammatory process (the rare medical condition--lymphocytic hypophysitis) in the pituitary area. Due to the devl ...

Mar 07, 2015
I would like some opinions as well as how you handle the below situation. My husband and I are very involved with friends, and we do a lot of dinners at one another's house. Often, it's just my husband and I and just one other couple. Two of the couples in the crowd have a viewpoint that we are a guest in their house, and we are not to help clean up. I understand that, but with their viewpoint, hubby and I feel we are staying too late because they still have to clean up, which could ...

Oct 03, 2012
First, I have a huge fear of dentists and I mean HUGE. Not just I don't like to go, I don't go because I sometimes throw up before I have to go (thinks to a horrible childhood dentist, but it carried over to adult). I get sweaty and nervous and about break out crying thinking of having to go. So....here is it 12 years since my last dentist visit. I broke a tooth so had no choice. The only reason I was able to go my last dentist and tolerate it was because ...

Jul 31, 2013
Everyone needs to get a grip on their emotions. The reason why I delete a post is if a poster is personally insulting another poster. I'm not going to delete anyones post who is giving their opinion on an issue they feel is important to them. You want to insult me fine, but I'm not going to leave the insults up from one group and delete the insults from another. I was banning the people who were insulting but they didn't like that. It also does not help wh ...

Oct 07, 2013
link ...

Jun 09, 2015
I have almost zero tolerance to heat plus that annoying pin and needle thing happens if I get too hot. And anything over mid seventies is hot. Eighties today, fans, fans and fans! That is about the best that can be done. It gets really nice in the evening or early morning hours. =)So, what do you do? The car does have AC and it is AMAZING! It is a life saver! (never really had one until last year) ...

Dec 06, 2015
I have a lady who used to work for me and have been like kind of a grandmother figure to her 3 teens. Yesterday I took them to a Christmas parade in our town, cold like in the 30s but warmed up in a short while and by the time we arrived back to my home it was in the 50s-60s outside and my inside thermostat was set at 68. I asked the kids to take off their coats while in house and they stated they were cold, in fact one even was lying on the couch with the blanket she had taken to the parade t ...

Apr 21, 2011
I always enjoy dropping by here for a break, between tasks. I'm learning that I get cranky about politics. Obviously I need an outlet from stressful work, but I'm just not sure I can handle politics. I'm never cranky around people that I see in person. Why is it so hard to do on forums! I admire those who are able to be statesmanish, even on forums such as this. That is a goal I am setting for myself. ...

Jun 10, 2010
http://rawstory.com/rs/2010/0610/lewis-blacks-spill-solution-declare-war-invade-bp/ ...

Sep 20, 2011
I moved to this very small town 5 years ago, and I have noticed that favoritism, who you know, how much money you have, etc. plays a HUGE part in kids sports, school activities, town activities, etc. Now, I'm not one of those mothers who thinks that my children are the best at everything they do and deserve to be the star all of the time. Also I have seen it happen to other kids that aren't my own and I've heard other parents complaining about among themselves whilst s ...

May 04, 2015
I have had repeated problems with these people and I'm done, but my daughter and their daughter are best friends and I just feel bad for the girls. Here's the situation. Over the weekend, I took both girls shopping for 8th grade graduation dresses. We go into Kohl's and the girls take off to the junior section to try on dressing while I shop around. They make their choices and proceed to the register where my daughter's friend says she has a $100 ...

Oct 31, 2013
My daughter is 13 and in the 7th grade. A few days ago, she tells me that she is in a "blue" mood because there are rumors being passed around about her. I ask her what the rumors are and she said her friends won't tell her because they don't want to hurt her feelings. Clearly, my daughter was upset. My daughter is a straight A student, very kind hearted, and well liked. She has lots of friends and tries to be nice to everyone. So someone spreading r ...