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Repeat Fox News flash

Posted: Feb 7, 2012

As previously reported, Fox News has announced that the world is flat and many loyal viewers have been killed in a stampede in an attempt to buy falling off the end of the earth insurance also known as the OOPSY (off of planet, see ya) policy. Fox regrets these unfortunate deaths but will not retract anything. All evidence to the contrary is liberal propaganda.

;

I prefer the Onion - sm

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for fake news over Fox. The Onion makes up all its stories too but they assume a level of intelligence in their readers. Plus their stories are really funny.

They shouldn't assume a level of intelligence - See link

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Not all readers are intelligent.

http://www.politico.com/news/stories/0212/72507.html

knee slapper - !! - Sober Neerly

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What a funny! But I note the dumb one here was an elected republican who reposted this as fact. He is the da-doop who failed to understand the Onion article was satire.

way too funny! - nm

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The Onion - Mgc

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I agree! At least The Onion shows a bit of intelligence in their made up news. Fox "News?" Not so much.

Republicans and an intelligent sense of humor just doesn't go together. Not sure what's wrong with these people, I'm just glad I don't have it. No need to take it personally. I'm assuming republicans can't help it.

Is there a study on Republicans and sense of humor? - maybe worthless nm

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Republican humor test - sm

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Yes, it was called electing George Dubya Bush TWO TIMES.

Ooh... I got one. - SM for punch line

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Fair and Balanced.

They do have a sense of humor. Best 1-liner in - history came from GOP

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Courtesy of Sen Jon Kyl's office: "not intended to be a factual statement."

If you fail to see the comedic genius in it, try saying it with a straight face. It's impossible!

Best 1-liner - came from Reagan

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I'm from the government and I'm here to help.

Study on Repubs humor - Unlike the Dems who

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like to laugh at anything/anyone the Dems don't understand...leaves them pretty much hysterical 24/7.

I heard a really great one last year - Hilarious!

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"There's no question at times of my life, partially driven by how passionately I felt about this country, that I worked far too hard and things happened in my life that were not appropriate." —Newt Gingrich

HAAAAhahahaha*snort*hahaha

I heard a really great one last year. - Mgc

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Thanks for the chuckle! Good stuff, indeed!

"There's no question at times of my life, partially driven by how passionately I felt about this country, that I worked far too hard and things happened in my life that were not appropriate." —Newt Gingrich

HAAAAhahahaha*snort*hahaha

I know funny, and phony phone calls are - Hilarious!!!!

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Move over Jerky Boys and Crank Yankers... GOP prank phone calls are classic (AND easy to understand... even for a lib)!

Walker: Hi; this is Scott Walker.

Koch: Scott! David Koch. How are you?

Walker: Hey, David! I’m good. And yourself?

Koch: I’m very well. I’m a little disheartened by the situation there, but, uh, what’s the latest?

Walker: Well, we’re actually hanging pretty tough. I mean—you know, amazingly there’s a much smaller group of protesters—almost all of whom are in from other states today. The State Assembly is taking the bill up—getting it all the way to the last point it can be at where it’s unamendable. But they’re waiting to pass it until the Senate’s—the Senate Democrats, excuse me, the assembly Democrats have about a hundred amendments they’re going through. The state Senate still has the 14 members missing but what they’re doing today is bringing up all sorts of other non-fiscal items, many of which are things members in the Democratic side care about. And each day we’re going to ratchet it up a little bit…. The Senate majority leader had a great plan he told about this morning—he told the Senate Democrats about and he’s going to announce it later today, and that is: The Senate organization committee is going to meet and pass a rule that says if you don’t show up for two consecutive days on a session day—in the state Senate, the Senate chief clerk—it’s a little procedural thing here, but—can actually have your payroll stopped from being automatically deducted—

Koch: Beautiful.

Walker: —into your checking account and instead—you still get a check, but the check has to be personally picked up and he’s instructing them—which we just loved—to lock them in their desk on the floor of the state Senate.

Koch: Now you’re not talking to any of these Democrat bastards, are you?

Walker: Ah, I—there’s one guy that’s actually voted with me on a bunch of things I called on Saturday for about 45 minutes, mainly to tell him that while I appreciate his friendship and he’s worked with us on other things, to tell him I wasn’t going to budge.

Koch: Goddamn right!

Walker: …his name is Tim Cullen—

Koch: All right, I’ll have to give that man a call.

Walker: Well, actually, in his case I wouldn’t call him and I’ll tell you why: he’s pretty reasonable but he’s not one of us…

Koch: Now who can we get to budge on this collective bargaining?

Walker: …I think the paycheck will have an impact…secondly, one of the things we’re looking at next…we’re still waiting on an opinion to see if the unions have been paying to put these guys up out of state. We think there’s at minimum an ethics violation if not an outright felony.

Koch: Well, they’re probably putting hobos in suits.

Walker: Yeah.

Koch: That’s what we do. Sometimes.

Walker: I mean paying for the senators to be put up. I know they’re paying for these guy—I mean, people can pay for protesters to come in and that’s not an ethics code, but, I mean, literally if the unions are paying the 14 senators—their food, their lodging, anything like that…[* Important regarding his later acceptance of a Koch offer to “show him a good time.” *]

[I was stunned. I am stunned. In the interest of expediting the release of this story, here are the juiciest bits:]

Walker: …I’ve got layoff notices ready…

Koch: Beautiful; beautiful. Gotta crush that union.

Walker: [bragging about how he doesn't budge]…I would be willing to sit down and talk to him, the assembly Democrat leader, plus the other two Republican leaders—talk, not negotiate and listen to what they have to say if they will in turn—but I’ll only do it if all 14 of them will come back and sit down in the state assembly…legally, we believe, once they’ve gone into session, they don’t physically have to be there. If they’re actually in session for that day, and they take a recess, the 19 Senate Republicans could then go into action and they’d have quorum…so we’re double checking that. If you heard I was going to talk to them that’s the only reason why. We’d only do it if they came back to the capital with all 14 of them…

Koch: Bring a baseball bat. That’s what I’d do.

Walker: I have one in my office; you’d be happy with that. I have a slugger with my name on it.

Koch: Beautiful.

Walker: [union-bashing...]

Koch: Beautiful.

Walker: So this is ground zero, there’s no doubt about it. [Talks about a “great” NYT piece of “objective journalism.” Talks about how most private blue-collar workers have turned against public, unionized workers.]…So I went through and called a handful, a dozen or so lawmakers I worry about each day and said, “Everyone, we should get that story printed out and send it to anyone giving you grief.”

Koch: Goddamn right! We, uh, we sent, uh, Andrew Breitbart down there.

Walker:Yeah.

Koch: Yeah.

Walker: Good stuff.

Koch: He’s our man, you know.

Walker: [blah about his press conferences, attacking Obama, and all the great press he's getting.] Brian [Sadoval], the new Governor of Nevada, called me the last night he said—he was out in the Lincoln Day Circuit in the last two weekends and he was kidding me, he said, “Scott, don’t come to Nevada because I’d be afraid you beat me running for governor.” That’s all they want to talk about is what are you doing to help the governor of Wisconsin. I talk to Kasich every day—John’s gotta stand firm in Ohio. I think we could do the same thing with Vic Scott in Florida. I think, uh, Snyder—if he got a little more support—probably could do that in Michigan. You start going down the list there’s a lot of us new governors that got elected to do something big.

Koch: You’re the first domino.

Walker: Yep. This is our moment.

Koch: Now what else could we do for you down there?

Walker: Well the biggest thing would be—and your guy on the ground [Americans For Prosperity president Tim Phillips] is probably seeing this [stuff about all the people protesting, and some of them flip him off].

[Abrupt end of first recording, and start of second.]

Walker: [Bullshit about doing the right thing and getting flipped off by “union bulls,” and the decreasing number of protesters. Or some such.]

Koch: We’ll back you any way we can. What we were thinking about the crowd was, uh, was planting some troublemakers.

Walker: You know, well, the only problem with that —because we thought about that. The problem—the, my only gut reaction to that is right now the lawmakers I’ve talked to have just completely had it with them, the public is not really fond of this…[explains that planting troublemakers may not work.] My only fear would be if there’s a ruckus caused is that maybe the governor has to settle to solve all these problems…[something about '60s liberals.]…Let ‘em protest all they want…Sooner or later the media stops finding it interesting.

Koch: Well, not the liberal bastards on MSNBC.

Walker: Oh yeah, but who watches that? I went on “Morning Joe” this morning. I like it because I just like being combative with those guys, but, uh. You know they’re off the deep end.

Koch: Joe—Joe’s a good guy. He’s one of us.

Walker: Yeah, he’s all right. He was fair to me…[bashes NY Senator Chuck Schumer, who was also on the program.]

Koch: Beautiful; beautiful. You gotta love that Mika Brzezinski; she’s a real piece of ass.

Walker: Oh yeah. [story about when he hung out with human pig Jim Sensenbrenner at some D.C. function and he was sitting next to Brzezinski and her father, and their guest was David Axelrod. He introduced himself.]

Koch: That son of a bitch!

Walker: Yeah no kidding huh?…

Koch: Well, good; good. Good catching up with ya’.

Walker: This is an exciting time [blah, blah, blah, Super Bowl reference followed by an odd story of pulling out a picture of Ronald Reagan and explaining to his staff the plan to crush the union the same way Reagan fired the air traffic controllers]…that was the first crack in the Berlin Wall because the Communists then knew Reagan wasn’t a pushover. [Blah, blah, blah. He's exactly like Reagan. Won't shut up about how awesome he is.]

Koch: [Laughs] Well, I tell you what, Scott: once you crush these bastards I’ll fly you out to Cali and really show you a good time.

Walker: All right, that would be outstanding. [* Ethical violation much? *] Thanks for all the support…it’s all about getting our freedoms back…

Koch: Absolutely. And, you know, we have a little bit of a vested interest as well. [Laughs]

Walker: [Blah] Thanks a million!

Koch: Bye-bye!

Walker: Bye.

The fact that these words came out of this - guy's mouth is 100%

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hysterical:

"I won’t place one more dollar of debt upon the backs of my kids..." Rep. Joe Walsh

OhNoHeDidn't!!!!

This made me giggle, and I'm pretty sure I - understood it

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Barbara Walters: What kind of cabinet position might you like, if it were possible?

Herman Cain: We are speaking totally, totally hypothetical, right? Totally, totally hypothetical...

Walters: Yeah.

Cain: Department of Defense!

Walters: What?!

teeheehehe!

Fox "News" Flash - M

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Hahahahaha.. Good one.

BTW: I've been reading on one other Government & Politics board which I frequent about the republicans hating the Clint Eastwood ad about Detroit. lol. Hell, it made me feel good that something positive is finally coming out of Detroit. I'll never understand the republican mindset. Thank God!

Clint eastwood ad - bat ears

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Rush Limbaugh was going on and on about it. He said it was not even MADE in Detroit. I guess that negates the whole point? Karl Rove was offended, but we all know Karl is no longer relevant to anyone or anything.

Clint said it was not political - I think patriotic

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Not surprised Republicans are against it.

Heres the link if you missed it - Clink

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And Clint is a Republican. I think he used - mthead

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to be the mayor of Carmel, California.

Fox News Flash - M - Your IQ has to be higher than the temp outside

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to be in the same realm as a Republican. From the lib/Dems/progs posts on here, have not seen one yet with an IQ above the temp...good luck! BTW, if Detroit had 14 mill to make that commercial, why not pay down the 1.4-billion they still out the taxpayer....Oh wait, the socialist told Detroit "not to worry about it". Try that with your debts.

The lovely library lady...gees - mbmt

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Do you think your IQ is higher than your temp? Gee, you have used the IQ/temp line before and the socialist line...blah..blah...blah. What is your problem? Why are you so nasty all the time? Everybody on this board has a right to express their opinions, and I, for one, am glad you cannot stop that.

Right back atcha - MBMT

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"What is your problem?" Don't know who you think I am, don't care...better read the posting rules again. I borrowed the temp line because it surely fits the comments on this board, especially yours. Might serve your IQ well to go to the library. Sick of your constant insults to others and then the sad attempt of you acting like a victim when called out. Have seen you pretty nasty to others with a number of posts on here. FOLLOW YOUR OWN ADVICE - SHUT UP AND LEAVE ME ALONE. Not going to take your garbage.

Like I said before - mbmt

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It is a good thing you cannot decide who posts on this board.

to MBMT - TheCrybabyLibs

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Right back atcha AGAIN. By the by, you may want to check the rules about making assumptions regarding someone's identity....girl you are soooo off.

Atcha - mbmt

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Well, I guess if there are rules like you describe (and, of course, not your own personal rules for this board), you will need to contact the moderator and get me kicked off the board. Be careful though, because you just might be doing me a huge favor.

Don't let your stalkers run you off. - anon

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I suspect you're hitting a nerve among the grenade throwers for your reasoned assessments and polite discourse. They are trying to bring you down to their level. The more rational among us will miss your contributions to the board. Regarding banning, I really do think their behavior is harassing and stalker-like, which should be grounds for banishment.

stalkers - goes both ways

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Don't see any nerves hit, but see very little of the reasoned assessments and polite discourse mentioned. Some people on this board are already so low, pretty hard to manage them sinking any further. Cannot express 1 idea or thought, not exactly like theirs, without being attacked by the chosen few. There are many on this board that fall into the harassing and stalker-like status; just check out the posts above this one. Then, they always complain about moving on or not reading their posts..just too bad they don't follow their own advice. Me, I find most of it comic relief.

I agree. Don't use a moniker - Read this

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This board is ridiculous... and this goes for some posters AND the moderating. My SIL would post on this board quite often, is very liberal, and always used the same moniker. Never cursed, wasn't rude unless she was addressed that way, and finally was banned PERMANENTLY for saying a drive-by poster was like a "heckler at a comedy club." Please take note of the "You're an idiot" post. Idiot is acceptable; heckler is not acceptable. Allrightythen. http://general.mtstars.com/288389.html

I started posting on here about a year or so ago, and I also used a consistent moniker. I actually thought I was being polite for doing that so folks could keep track of who they were talking to. It wasn't long before I had anon posters engaging for no other reason but to start an argument. Finally, when one poster brought up a post that took place over a month earlier (it wasn't even on the current page anymore) and then went on a tirade of how I was supposedly hypocritical (which didn't even make sense, and the poster sounded like a nut), I got an idea of how unstable some of the posters on here are and ditched that moniker. My latest moniker "read this" (which I will use for the last time here) has resulted in having a post removed by the moderator a few days ago for repeating a term originally posted by the person I was replying to, but when I used it, all of a sudden it was obscene. It was in a post which was later removed in its entirety regarding OWS, and the "foul language" that I used had to do with public defecation. Think of a table at a casino where you throw dice, or you can go to a post above where the same term is used but is all of a sudden acceptable: http://general.mtstars.com/288798.html

Bottom line... if you use a consistent moniker on here and come across with a consistent POV with that moniker (in this case, leaning left), you'll get nutjobs who will respond to you just to be nasty and/or report every post you make to the moderator to try to get you banned (or at least your post removed). I have absolutely no explanation for the inconsistency on the moderator's part.

BTW, I would be among those who would miss mbmt's contributions. Think about ditching the name.

You have stripped the elephant - in the middle of the room

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I knew I was not alone in experiencing this! Bravo for your post. Its like the voyage from Deliverance everytime you visit this place. I have a sneaking suspicion that maybe the 2 problems are residing in same physical body? Again, I step up to vouch for the veracity of your statements.

Ditto! - nm

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I hear you! - sm

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The fact that your SIL was banned for the heckler remark is a shame. In my experience, if poster #1 reports poster #2, poster #2 gets banned. No thinking involved. It's astonishing to me that the "idiot" post still remains on the board. I am sure I am not the only one who has reported it. There are some really abusive Teflon posters here, and I wish they would be permanently banned.

Whenever I have attempted to use a moniker, it has served as flypaper for every available parasite to target.

so glad this is being discussed - not the lonely one

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Especially the comment about reporting an abusive stalker and then being the person banned. happened here also.
(banjo music)

Maybe if we all ask nicely - The Artist FKA Read This

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the moderator can start a new board, a Banishment Board, where we can all share our stories of being banned and/or deleted. Kinda like an MT Stars detention center. And, if you manage to get banned from the Banishment Board, you'll know you're hardcore. A real rebel.

Anyhow, I've found myself kinda enjoying coming up with clever temporary monikers that I use on a by-the-topic basis. Just use 'em once (maybe twice) so as not to attract nutjobs on a routine basis. And, if you're dealing with a loon with a pathological need to have the last word... let 'em have it (it's usually ridiculous anyway). I'm convinced that they're the real winners who frantically report posts if they think someone got some sort of jab in on them.

All of these issues are ridiculous and shouldn't have to be disucssed on a forum meant for ADULTS, but *sigh* there it is. Best advice I can give.

I agree with everything you said. - sm

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I, too, once had a moniker and had also been banned (temporarily) for responding to a poster who started the name calling.

I also became a target for the ultra right wing. They didn't need to read my posts; they just attacked because they saw the moniker, like a reflex reaction.

I doubt that I'll ever use a moniker again for that very reason.

There is currently at least one very angry right-winger on this board who does nothing but bully and insult. Given her chosen politics, she will be posting here for a very long time.

sm - and previous posters

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Just read your whole thread today, and found it pretty comical. You're all complaining about a poster(s) because you didn't care for the way they talked to you/about you. Evidently, you did not bother to read your own beginning posts that were initially insulting towards that same poster(s). I found them pretty offensive; so, what do you expect that poster(s) to say in return. No wonder you were banned or suspended or whatever. I don't have skin in the game; so, I don't care..just an observation. Pretty easy process...treat others as you want treated. Guess you got back what you gave, and what did you really accomplish? Maybe talking to the moderator for your own board to talk amongst yourself (yourselves) is a good idea. Even through the previous 4-5 posts here, there are very derogatory comments and name calling made in regards to people that did not share your opinion. You think the moderator is blind? I am sure they can see what we do.

■You're an idiot - How's that term of endearment - LbNaCl

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Please, go ahead and report this post, the opening line of which was copied and pasted exactly from a post below and has been reported to the moderator by at least 2 different people on this thread. Three things can happen here:
1. Only this current post will be deleted (and perhaps I will be banned)... just further proving the point of the folks engaging in this discussion before you popped on.
2. This post AND the original post will be deleted. Great... finally the original post below calling someone an IDIOT (which does not belong on a forum for adults) will be addressed. It's been reported over the course of 4 days already.
3. This post and the original post will not be addressed at all. Well then... at least I got to get the opening line off my chest, and I enjoyed the opportunity to vent.

Have fun.

**TO THE MODERATOR** Please note that I have posted in a fashion NO DIFFERENT than that contained in the following post which has been reported more than once over the course of the past few days:

http://general.mtstars.com/288389.html

The fact that the older post has not been removed leads posters (myself included) to think that that type of language is acceptable for this site. Therefore, if this current post is to be deleted, a thorough explanation as to why would be greatly appreciated.

silence is deafening - crickets

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I am pleased that this issue has been brought forth and the bias has been exposed. That is enough for me. After all, it is merely a message board.

Please read - Moderator

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The offending post you referenced below has been removed.

People need to refrain from name calling. Opinions are welcome, just not the name calling.

Thank you for your post.

what are you reading? - nm

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He/she doesn't know. - nm

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Your response was even more comical. - sm

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"sm" stands for "some more."

Please specify which post(s) you found offensive, and I'll tell you if I posted it/them.

You're almost right, except you have it backwards: I gave back what I GOT, and that's what got me banned, while the person doing the initial insulting continued to be free to post.

Again, I challenge you to specify which posts you "think" were posted by me.

Fox "News" Flash - M

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Hey, I can't help it if republicans can't see their way out of what Fox News and their talking heads tell them what to think. All we hear is about how republicans are the "real" Americans and how the libs don't' want to do anything to help the country, then you all go crazy over that commercial. It was a positive about America and Detroit and for some reason, I've yet to read on this forum as well a few others I frequent say one thing positive about it. What's up with that? Just admit you don't want anything positive to happen while Obama's in The White House and get it over with. It's obvious anyway that the pubs will say and do anything to get him out of office. In fact, it's become a joke about you "real" Americans who can't do anything but constantly spew republican rhetoric that comes from Rove, Coulter, Rush, Malkin, Hannity, Neal Boortz, and last but certainly not least, Glenn Beck. Pitiful. This President has been the most maligned since I became interested in politics in 2000.

So let me tell you what I've been hearing for so long. If you won't support and stand behind your president, you aren't patriotic and should get out of America. How do you like me now?

Seriously, WHY did you post that? The level of - juvenile junk is stooping lower than ever. nm

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nm

I posted it because - Greta Van Suspect

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1. There is virtually no humor on this board.
2. The statements emanating from Fox News and its commentators are just as ridiculous as this post but are nevertheless believed by millions of their viewers who take what is said there as gospel and condemn any attempt to refute their absurd statements as Liberal propaganda.

Juvenile junk - I'm with you

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There is a group on here that thinks being insulting, rude, attacking someone's post or their grammar, is funny. Stand up to them and they attack you verbally until they draw blood (see the one above that stood up to them and was called a "stalker" - after taking several verbal hits from the outraged group). Say those things back to them, first thing they do is cry "victim", write about how terribly they are treated (forget to mention they threw the first punch), how they don't deserve this in response to their ever enlightening posts (only in their mind), carry on about killing all conservatives (yep, that's in one of their posts, too). Hopefully, this board is not a true example of society; otherwise, pretty sad example.

I think this board is a microcosm of society as - sm

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a whole. Notice the tie between the "likes" and "dislikes" votes on your post alone.

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http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/11/26/fox-news-interview-guest-network-wing-republican-party_n_2192506.html This is a link to an actual Fox News clip of an interview that they cut off after 90 seconds. Now there is that good ol' freedom of speech. ...

Jul 23, 2010
Nothing like dragging your feet....this all boils down to the 2008 investigation that was started then. Guess they just completed a full investigation now. This article is 2 pages and there is video on there, too, but I could barely hear it. A House ethics subcommittee announced Thursday that it found that Rep. Charles B. Rangel violated congressional ethics rules and that it will prepare for a trial, probably beginning in September. The panel is expected to make the details of his alle ...

Feb 22, 2015
The CEO of Aetna Insurance has decided, after conducting a review, to raise the pay of some 5,700 of their employees to $16.00 per hour. The CEO said that many of these employees were making $13 or $14 per hour and were unable to purchase the companies health insurance for themselves or their children forcing them onto public assistance. Half a million low-wage workers will get a raise in April, when Walmart lifts hourly wages at its stores in the United States to at least $9. The raise, an ...

Aug 01, 2017
Pretty disgusting all in all. Then they retracted the entire story. Many of you were up in arms about Seth Rich, what happened to that story? Well, maybe Fox realized they would be exposed for being Trump's errand boy so he could distract the media with his, wait for it, FAKE NEWS! ...

Apr 19, 2013
Your favorite station is saying there is a 3rd subject and that police stopped an Amtrak train going from Boston to CT. This kid is very dangerous. He and his brother had Facebook pages, too. I've been watching since 5 a.m. Very interesting. FBI did a fantastic job. Too badk they didn't catch the younger one. Too bad CM and his ilk was totally WRONG as usual. Will they apologize? Of course not! They;ll keep trying to find a link between these Chechyans and the right wing, but since ...

Feb 19, 2017
investigated - Roger Ailes case? ...

Feb 16, 2017
When even the Conservative Propaganda Channel, Fox News, turns against their darling Mr. Trump, you know he's in trouble... https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fysSDYkhHlU ...

Feb 02, 2015
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/robert-reich/trans-pacific-partnership_b_6585028.html ...

Dec 17, 2016
has confirmed the Russians hacked our election do you believe it? ...

Jul 30, 2015
Fox does so much that is offensive and an absolute waste of time. About a page down you can view the Fox video. http://www.rawstory.com/2015/07/fox-host-the-role-of-modern-women-is-to-engage-in-a-little-horizontal-hula-and-then-make-him-a-sandwich/ ...

Sep 28, 2011
x ...

Oct 15, 2009
BREAKING NEWS: This just in!!! Obama wins the Heisman Trophy after watching a college football game!!! ...

Apr 01, 2011
President Obama has finally shown his birth certificate proving he is a US citizen. He also has decided to let his college records and papers be open to public viewing. Oh yeah...and BTW.....April fools...or as I like to call it....Liberal Day! ...