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Would like to have guardenship of my next door

Posted: May 13, 2014

I have 4 indoor cats, never outside. Our community has a no animal outside policy. My next door neighbor's cat thinks he belongs here. He stays here almost 24/7 at my back door, at my front door, looks in the windows at my cats and I feel so sorry for it. I have fed it, I have given it treats as I do my own. It seems so starved for affection and my heart just aches seeing it outside plus the fact we have coyotes in our neighborhood plus other animals that would like to have this little on on its menu. My husband says no, leave the cat alone. Do you think I could offer to provide indoor living with prn vistation when they want? ;

Yes. - sm

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I would do that. Maybe they'll say he can be yours. :)

I would just ... - sm

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I would just let the little guy in for visits and let them get longer and longer. If everyone gets along, and if the neighbors don't search for it -- and how would they know it is gone, anyway -- you have one more kitty.

I would not mention it to your husband, either. LOL.

If they mention it, just say you thought he was a stray. That's what he was, after all.

Of course, I assume that people who put cats outside to go hungry and become coyote chow do not actually want the cat in the first place. They are hoping nature, or animal control, will disappear it.

Keep it and it just might end up being - your favorite cat. nm

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x

Don't ask them. Just do it. Asking they might say no - Been there done that

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Just let it in and like the other poster said if they see it just say you thought it was a stray.

Never 'take' an animal that is not yours - unless it is being TRULY abused

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and even then you should follow the law.

I totally applaud you for caring, but you don't know what care this cat gets - and unless you see real signs of abuse you can't assume.

Letting him/her in for visits is absolutely fine - feeding, treats - yay you! But you really cannot keep it at some point and hope the neighbor doesn't notice. You don't know if you will be breaking someone's heart by having them wonder what happened to their cat.

(Just because you think it is not (as well) cared for as yours does not mean it is not loved by someone).

Finally, why not just TALK to your neighbor? You could say the cat visits a lot and you love him and would it be okay for him to come in when he visits? That not only lets the neighbor know what's going on but could result in them saying you can have the cat, and would also plant a seed that perhaps the cat should be not be consigned outdoors all the time.

I know this is a response opposite to the others, but I hope you consider it - it's the fair thing to do.

I have talked with the neighbor several times regarding - the kittycat, just sent email yesterday

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joking and telling her I am now considering eminent domain, taking over her cat and also how I love the cat myself. I have never thought about stealing a cat, never. My county has been bothered here lately with rabied animals turning up, several incidences and I asked about his rabies shots being as he is out all the time, maybe he spends the nights in her garage but mostly out. I told her I worry about him and I would be more than happy if he did not have his rabies to take to my vet and get him one. One thing you suggested that I would never go along with and that is just let him come in and visit. I have 4 cats, never outside and you would never just let a cat in with another to visit, talk about a fight on your hands. Cats have to get aquainted with another cat and unless I know the cat is free of disease, healthy, never could come into my home to even get used to the others and live here. I would never run the risk of chancing my cats health for a visit from another feline. As far as assuming abuse, never did that but I know how often the cat is outside my door, peering in my windows, walking with me when I go the mailbox, get the garage can, etc, as yesterday here all day long from morning until after dark. This is about an every day thing so abuse, never said but I do know the animal spends more time here than at home.

I think that cat is giving you the answer - mom of 6 cats

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you are looking for and he wants to be a part of your life. You don't want to wait until it is too late and something bad happens to the cat. There are a lot of dangers to outside cats such as dogs, cars, people who don't like cats, hawks, etc.

Let us know how the e-mail was received. - Cat lover also

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I hope they let you take it in. If not, I would still be nice to it as you are. I could not agree more about being cautious with your cats. They are your first priority!

I had a neighbor "adopt" one of mine...SM - Old Anon

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Mine have always been indoor/outdoor. Outdoor during the day, weather permitting, and in at sundown. They have all lived into their middle teens or higher and were healthy, up to date on shots, and flealess. I had an elderly neighbor, a very sweet lady, who loved cats and would let "Buddy" come in and visit, then she started to feed him. She knew he was mine. After a while Buddy preferred her food and wouldn't come in to eat the food I had for him. I asked her not to feed him and why, but she continued to do it. Eventually, Buddy would not come in the house at sundown either and I had no idea where he was or if my elderly friend was taking him at night or not. The situation was out of my control, and he really belonged to neither one of us at this point. Well, one morning the sweet lady found him dead in the street outside her house, apparently at the hands of a predator. She was balling her eyes out. The moral of my story is to not try to take over the care of someone else's pet assuming they are not being cared for properly. Mine was until my poor old friend, who thought she was doing a good thing, got involved and it contributed to his early demise.

in addition...SM - Old Anon

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Never ever feed someone else's cat. In my case food was a way to get them to come in the house and when he got fed elsewhere, that incentive was gone. I would not have minded my old friend having him in for a visit because she was lonely and Buddy was good company for her. Her feeding him just tipped the balance too far.

Response to email regarding cat and further - things

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The lady was so glad I sent her an email. That was 05/16 and she told me she would be back on Monday, 4 days later. She said she was worried about the cat and glad to know he was ok. Her neighbor on the other side (I live on 1, this person on the other side) was to be watching out for the cat. Her son came in from college yesterday and my husband and I leaving. The fellow was trying to get his cat to come to him and the cat turned around and started back to my home. He came and got him, I was glad he did but that did not last long. Today the cat back at the door all day long. As far as my possibly causing harm to the cat, the owner is almost shoulder to shoulder with me, the cat walks thru her yard to come into mine, not in the street and as far as not trying to take over someone else's cat assuming, I don't have to assume. She is the one (even after I told her about seeing a coyote on my patio and warning her to be careful about her outdoor cats), continues to have her cats out. Oh, just for the record, I asked her high school aged son about a cat they had that used to come in my yard and he stated guess the cat left. I never told him about what was in the neighborhood but figured a predator got that one, just did not want to tell a child that. I wish a thousand times the cat would stay at home. I have 4 of my own and worry when I see him sitting outside all the time.

I will say this and not assuming, much better animal parent than she is and the reason is just what I stated above. I personally saw a coyote, told her about it and said cats and dogs cannot get away from them and still she lets the cats run around in the neighborhood. I am a very responsible animal owner and that is not an assumption.

Another concerned neighbor story...SM - Old Anon

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In addition to my story about Buddy above, I also had a cat named Freddie (the freeloader) who was super friendly and went visiting all over the neighborhood looking for handouts, even though he had plenty of food at home. That was just his personality.

Well one day, he arrived home wearing a flea collar BUT he already had been treated with a spot-on flea product. I attached his name and my phone number to the flea collar as a "hint" to call me if there was some concern about him.

A week or two later, I got a call from the police that they had Freddie incarcerated (their words) at the station but I could hear laughing and chuckling in the background. I went right down there with a cat carrier to retrieve him.

When I got there, they explained that someone had brought him there thinking that he was hurt or abused because he had a missing front tooth (he was old). I explained to the police about Freddie's wandering ways, and I brought his rabies certificate from the vet. They were perfectly understanding and I took him home.

Thanks goodness the do-gooders didn't bring him to our awful animal shelter or he would have been a goner for sure. Also, they had my phone number and they could have called me but didn't.

A couple years later, I was walking in the neighborhood and spotted Freddie at a house 2 doors down. The owners were outside. They assumed that he was a stray, but I told them that Freddie was my cat. At that point, I had had it with Freddie being mistaken for a stray and asked them if they wanted him. They said yes, so I went home and got his papers, etc. and said they could have him.

Again, my cats are indoor/outdoor. I make sure they are indoors at sundown. They are well fed, up to date on shots, and treated for fleas/ticks, and all have lived into their mid teens. I let them live like cats, too, free to explore the great outdoors.

I know some do not believe cats should be let out, but I'm not one of them.

So, the moral of this story is to leave other people's cats alone. They may be well taken care of, even if you don't think so.

And anyone with good morals would keep their - animals safe

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Well known fact that indoor animals live much longer than outside ones. I do not want a cat hunting and killing the birds or squirrels that I put seed out for. Oh, for your information I live in a community where outside animals are not even allowed so the neighbor next door is breaking the home association rules to start with. Hopefully she nor I neither one will have to see what one neighbor close by did one morning, all that was left of her cat was a bunch of fur in the driveway. So much for morals, right?

Are you casting aspersions on my morals? SM - Old Anon

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This is not a moral issue, it is a philosophical one. I guess I defied the statistics when all my indoor/outdoor cats lived into their mid-teens. I'm sorry you disagree with my belief, and you have a right to yours about keeping your cats inside for their safety and longevity. You have no right to call me immoral because I do not hold that same belief. Things went well until well-meaning neighbors assumed my guys were not being cared for appropriately and upset the balance, so to speak.

outdoor cats - tristen

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Simple solution if you have an inside/outside cat as I do, always put a name tag w/ your phone number and collar on them. Simple solution to solve the question of others wondering if it has a home nor not. If I see a cat without a collar I will assume it has no home and try to help it.

See my story above about Freddie...SM - Old Anon

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He had a collar with his name and my phone number on it, but still some do-gooder brought him to the police station instead of calling me because they thought he was abused/hurt because he has a missing tooth. My other cats lost their collars with ID tags as quick as I put them on and it got quite expensive replacing collars and tags all the time. I tried the collar thing like a responsible pet owner. In any event, they all lived to a ripe old age and died of age-related illnesses like kidney failure, heart attack, clots, etc. Thanks for the advice though.

You first came out about a story do not take other - people's animals, which was ridiculous

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to start with. You told about how the cat you owned killed out in the street because the little ole lady apparently confiscated the cat. I never had any intentions of trying to claim a cat. I have enough. If anyone comes to my door you can look in because of the glass on the front of my house and see the animals. I was told to let the cat "visit" with mine which is such a wrong statement. Cats not knowing one another would fight and I would never subject my cats to ones outside who are more than likely infestated with fleas which mine are not plus they could carry diseases (eating birds, rodents, fighting other animals could be subject to rabies plus other diseases). I know the rules of our neighborhood, I know predators are here (I have seen myself)and you seem to want to talk about "the moral of the story." Seems like you were all into my not "coveting" the cat, "assumptions" about its care so if you thought I was calling you amoral, so be it. I guess my assumption in cat owner not being responsible was correct. Had I not written an email to her about did the cat have its shots (being as rabies are here in our county), she was out of town and did not even know where the cat was plus she would be gone for another 4-5 days. You can drive in her driveway and look directly at my front porch and there lies the kitty in full view. I would, had it been okay with husband, asked if the cat could stay here until such time her son graduates college and takes the cat to his home BUT only after it was checked out by my vet and passed a well cat check. I personally think any person told coyotes seen within several hundred feet of their home, plus having cars passing within feet of their home on the streets plus pets having to be quarantined because of rabies in their county are extremely poor pet owners when their pets still run ad lib. Not finished with the cat situation.

To the OP...SM - Old Anon

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None of my posts were specifically directed at you. I am sure you are a very caring pet owner and do your very best to make sure yours are cared for and protected. There do seem to be a lot of pet owners in your neighborhood who are clueless about pet care and the dangers in your neighborhood, and you seem to be very concerned about that as well. So carry on with that. I've got a good handle on the situation in my neighborhood too, and that's what guides my actions. I'm done posting, and I hope you are too. Again, my posts were not personally directed at you, so let's agree to disagree and stop making assumptions about morals, motives, etc.

I dont know what I would do in your situation - cat lover too

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I feel your pain. My cats are mostly indoor, some outdoor (outdoor per my husband's insistence). I think you are doing the best you can. I would not be able to turn away a neglected kitty, either. I hope the neighbor takes some of your advice!

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