Funny quotes

As we can clearly see, W holds the championship title, hands down. "When the President does it, that means that it's not illegal." ~ Richard M. Nixon "We spent a lot of time talking about Africa, as we should. Africa is a nation that suffers from incredible disease." ~ President George W. Bush "The only way to reduce the number of nuclear weapons is to use them." ~ Rush Limbaugh ''My grandmother was not a highly educated woman, but she told m ...

Our 20th anniversary is coming up and I want to find a quote or short poem (can even be a line from a song) to express how wonderful I think my hubbster is. Any ideas? I am also going to burn a CD with love songs. I've got: John Denver's; Annie's Song Tesla, Love is all around you You are so Beautiful... that's about it! lol! Anyway, I'd appreciate some help... Thanks! ...

Thank you to previous poster who brought up Joseph Goebbels. I had to look it up. He said some very interesting things that reminds me so much of the NRA, Fox News, and Mitt Romney in particular (Mitt talked to the 1% about the 47% and then his wife talked about "you people.") * * * “It would not be impossible to prove with sufficient repetition and a psychological understanding of the people concerned that a square is in fact a circle. They are mere words, and words can be molded unt ...

1. Sheryl Crow on Environmentalism: "I propose a limitation be put on how many sqares [sic] of toilet paper can be used in any one sitting. Now, I don't want to rob any law-abiding American of his or her God-given rights, but I think we are an industrious enough people that we can make it work with only one square per restroom visit, except, of course, on those pesky occasions where 2 to 3 could be required.'" 2. Joe Biden on culturalism: "In Delaware, the largest growth of popul ...

These quotes show how the left has changed over the years, especially a certain ex-president._________________________________ In 'The Audacity of Hope:' “The number of immigrants added to the labor force every year is of a magnitude not seen in this country for over a century,” Obama noted. “If this huge influx of mostly low-skill workers provides some benefits to the economy as a whole—especially by keeping our workforce young, in contrast to a ...

"Ms. Simmons paused to highlight what she said was her husband's generous spirit. 'Tell them who's on your yacht this weekend! Tell him!' " http://www.theatlantic.com/politics/archive/2012/07/the-best-quotes-from-guests-at-romneys-hamptons-fundraisers/259554/ ...

I know some posters won't like this article, but instead of disliking right away -----stop----take your time to read the whole thing, then think about it -----then reread and think about it some more before commenting in the negative. Ten Key Quotes From President Obama's State of the Union Address Guy Benson Political Editor, Townhall.com Feb 13, 2013 12:01 AM EST President Obama rehashed many familiar themes this evening, calling on Congress to act on a ...

While there are plenty of Bible verses to mention while discussing immigration, President Obama on Tuesday quoted one which isn't so great, mainly because it's not real. "The good book says don't throw stones at glass houses, or make sure we're looking at the log in our eye before we are pointing out the moat in other folks eyes," Obama said during a speech in Nashville. One problem, though: The Bible never mentions glass houses. In addition to his b ...

I've come across some funny voice recognition, but this one...well, you be the judge! Dictated: ICD-9 code. Voice recognized as: Psychogenic potatoes!! ...

Here's a funny one just got not too long ago... "The patient smokes a six-pack of beer per week." DUHHHH.... ...

ASR transcribed: Follow the penis been discontinued. Should've been: Felodipine has been discontinued. ...

Dictated: Unable to assess the penis collapse. Should be: Unable to assess the venous collapse. Happy Monday!!! ...

Got this on a VR report today!!! Lexapro beef for his known drug allergies. ...

http://airamerica.com/ondemand/10-15-2009/the-republican-iphone-application-video/ ...

Doctor tried spelling a simple word, "celery," but spelled it out as S-A-L-E-R-Y. almost fell out of my chair laughing. ...

Dictates "does some 5-pound weights in the evening when he watches David Letterman." VR says "does some 5-pound weights in the evening when he watches meat." This will keep me giggling all night. ...

I have another funny clip for all of you. Enjoy it and keep laughing. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CXbCY_yRWOc ...

The 10 Differences Between Fox News and MSNBC By Ken Kupchik Fox News fans defend their network's journalistic integrity by pointing to high ratings and MSNBC as the liberal equivalent. While the comparison may seem valid on the surface, there are glaring differences between the two networks. 10) Fox News claims "fair and balanced" coverage, while MSNBC is simply "the place for politics." 9) MSNBC devotes a three-hour daily segment to Joe Scarborough, a conservative from Newt Ging ...

"The patient is a 46 year old woman with a history of depression who recently broke up with her seven-year-old boyfriend." - She likes them young! ...

think so, don't bother reading it. As Thanksgiving approaches and the turkeys go from writing their bucket lists to brine buckets, we should all stop and realize that there is a lot to be thankful for. Here is Air America's top ten list of things every progressive should be smiling about. 10) A president who can form a coherent sentence, and answer serious questions without a perpetual smirk. 9) Lou Dobbs running for president, disproving the theory that he is a narcissistic ...

We had one today that read, The patient appears to be (present) with fetus in cephalic presentation. This should have read pregnant. We got a good laugh from this one. ...

VR: ...neuromuscular reeducation with cannabis repositioning. (are they teaching her how to pass it?) s/b: ...canalith repositioning. ...

Doctor said: SKIN: No rashes, lesions, or lacerations of any kind appreciated. VR output: SKIN: No rashes, lesions, or lacerations of a cat appreciated. ...

Dictator: ... the patient was extubated and sent to the PACU in stable condition. VR: The patient was extubated and sent packing in stable conditon. ...

The patient's temperature was 100 degrees orally, but went up to 103.5 shortly thereafter, and therefore was arrested. Egads....I don't like the laws in that state. ha ha ...

Doctor dictated - The patient smokes. System typed - The patient smokes stool. Have no idea why it put in \"stool\", because there was nothing to sound like it. ...

Funny quotes

Those were great! Just what I needed today - Dinosaur

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