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Prayer Requests Latest Messages: Here we go again..

Please pray for me. Starting a new job and not sure - I can do this

Posted: Dec 4th, 2018 - 5:51 am

After 25 years in MT industry, I have spent 2 years without a job, despite never a QA issue, absentee issue, any issue.  I sent out hundreds of resumes and the few jobs which were offered were scams.  Now, I am joining a house cleaning operation and 2 of us must clean 5 houses a day.  For the first time, at 60, I am going to face grueling task of physical labor.  I fear I will not be able to do this due to sheer fatigue.  I usually walk with a cane due to breast cancer and imbalance due to lack of reconstruction, but will not have that ability anymore.  I will make 10.00 without benefits, paid 35 cents a mile.  If I cannot do this, I will be living in the car with my dogs.  


I am afraid of this depression I am feeling.  It is intolerable, hopeless, makes me edgy and want to retreat.  I cry at the drop of a hat and that is probably what cost me the job at a medical supply store; I began to cry silently.  I feel so abandoned by the medical field.  Seeing a doctor isn’t an option.  I have no family.  I just sold the house (house poor) and moved to Florida and wonder if I can even afford to live here.  Too late to change my mind because I spent all the equity getting here.  I actually drove a 16 foot Penske truck across the country to Pennsylvania and then to Florida, looking for a new place to call home.  I am one of those ladies who live alone and you rarely see but for when she walks her dogs or goes to the store.  I have been in the house since 2005.  


Please pray for me and my dogs, that we find create a life for ourselves.  I feel God close to me, he helped me get here; I had to rest at motels for 2-3 days - traffic on major freeways is 70-80 MPH, with all 3 dogs - I understood what a nervous breakdown was during that time.  Please God, give me the strength to live.


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