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Heartbroken Mom. - Please read

Posted: Dec 13th, 2017 - 2:31 pm In Reply to: Child in hospital for Christmas - Heartbroken mom

You do not mention how old your daughter is, nor do you mention her state of mind about Christmas this year. Consider it a blessing that her life was spared. That is worth rejoicing over, right? Would she be up to celebrating Christmas with you and whatever family and friends she wants to include? If so, speak to the staff at the facility about a family celebration with her. Not too formal, just love and closeness, not focusing on what led up to this, but discussing plans for the future. I have found that Christmas is not necessarily a particular day. I see many family members before and after December 25th and that is Christmas to us. Christmas is in your heart.

During this time, it might be best that YOU do not discuss her mental stability with her, just be there, loving and supportive. Your daughter is probably where she needs to be to get the help that she needs. YOU, on the other hand, could probably use a little emotional support yourself. People do not like it when parents share dirty laundry on social media, so it is probably best that you don't. Since you are not really receiving the support that you need, even from family, I would suggest that you see a counselor yourself. Not that there is anything wrong with you, but you need to regain some joy in your life. You need to deal with these family matters from a source of strength and confidence. A counselor would be like a coach who will focus on you, what you can and cannot do, how you handle things, and not feeling so alone. The simplest things they suggest can make a world of difference. For instance, I was told one time to make someone else smile every day. You do not have to know them. It could be someone in line at the bank or at a store. Say something, do something to make that person smile just for a second. I know that sounds stupid but until you try it you will not believe the difference it makes in your own life.

When you are ready, dry your tears. If Christmas does not work out this year, have a counselor help you focus on the future and not the past, and how you may be able to help your daughter and yourself at the same time to look forward. God knows what is in your heart. He knows what you need. He knows what you do not say when you pray. He answers prayers in His own time and in His own way. Have faith in that.

And remember, just because your daughter is in a hospital, it is still Christmas. Make sure you celebrate in some way, hopefully to include her. I hope your family heals in the very near future. God bless you.


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