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Do I trust him?

Posted: Sep 28, 2016

Been dating a guy for quite a while now. Met his entire family, aunts, uncles, his kids and grandkids. He lives an hour away, so I only see him on the weekends. We text all day and talk on the phone during the week.

I've noticed his facebook messaging habits have changed the past month. I'll get up in the morning and notice that he was online at like 3 in the morning. He'll tell me he fell asleep and thats why he didnt answer my messages, but they will be marked as seen by him. And, even though he is supposedly sleeping, when I check my facebook messenger during that same time frame, it will show him being online here and there.

I did speak to him about this. He said he isnt sure why it is doing that and why dont I trust him. This is just too much of a red flag for me.

;

Of course you do not trust him. - sm

[ In Reply To ..]
He lives an hour away! Can he trust you? I am not so sure you can trust each other. If simple FB messaging is "too much of a red flag" for you, you best get out now. If he is not lying, you still will not trust him. If he is lying, which is probably the case, why would you trust him? Have you two agreed to date each other exclusively? Personally, I have never met a man I could completely trust. Never. May be just my circumstances though.

I look at it this way, if he would lie about something as simple as you describe, what else would he lie about? The truth probably is that he was actually looking on FB but did not want to respond to you or anyone else.

A relationship without trust is total misery and in my opinion not worth it.

Always trust your gut feeling. . . - always.nm

[ In Reply To ..]
xxx

If he's lying this much to you now, imagine how - much thats going to escalate.

[ In Reply To ..]
Dump him.

FB - MT

[ In Reply To ..]
On many occasions, people I know show that they are online when indeed they are not. It has something to do with either the FB app, or FB messenger, and depending on whether or not it is left open on their phones. Just as an example, the other night, my brother showed he was online, and so I sent him a message asking if he was awake because our mom had been put in the hospital, and he never responded until the next morning. He said he had fallen asleep. My mother-in-law will show online at times as well, and she wasn't online. Also, if they logged into FB on a computer, and didn't log out, it will show them online for as long as they are logged in. If there is no other reason to distrust him, I wouldn't assume FB is. However, if there are other things, then you can assume that FB is affiliated somehow.

What Is - Quite a While?

[ In Reply To ..]
Some people think 3 months is quite a while. At 3 months collectively, only weekends does not equal "quite a while." I think 1 year is quite a while, even with only weekends.

Not sure why you're sticking around. Cautious skepticism is normal, but sounds to me like you are spying and getting your answers.

if he has his fb on cell phone -sometimes it does show as read - sm

[ In Reply To ..]
it stays on all night and when someone sends a message it can show up on the phone and if he still has the last message like say from 9:00, it can register as seen even though he hasnt actually seen it yet. But he could be lying as well. on the other hand, you are only dating so why pressure him? maybe he is just too tired to message you back or feels that you shouldnt be texting him at 3 a.m. just a thought.

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