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Nation's Bernie Supporters Frantically Cobble Together Makeshift - Rafts To Paddle To Utopian Cuba

Posted: Feb 26th, 2020 - 7:05 am

Satire, sort of :)

U.S.—After Bernie Sanders praised elements of Cuba's totalitarian regime, the presidential candidate's loyal supporters scrambled to cobble together makeshift rafts so they could paddle over to Cuba to experience the Communist island's renowned literacy programs, medical care, and other social services.

Desperate refugees clung to anything that would float as they attempted to sail across the Gulf and get to the idyllic paradise of Cuba.

"We just have to get over there," said one "Bernie Bro" as he fashioned a raft out of discarded plastic straws. "I for one want to experience Cuba's literacy program so I can finally read a book. And I've heard that their healthcare is the best in the world, as long as you're among the elite. Which, I'm sure I'll be accepted as the elite and not one of the peasants, since I'm from a wealthy, capitalist nation like America."

The Bernie Bro feared he had made a mistake as his iPhone dropped out of cell range a few hundred feet from shore, but it was too late to turn back.

Sadly, once the Bernie supporters had gone through Cuba's literacy program, they were able to read a history book and learn how bad socialism is, so they were forced to cobble together rafts to come back to America.

LINK/URL: Nation's Bernie Supporters Frantically Cobble Together Makeshift

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Nation's Bernie Supporters Frantically Cobble Together Makeshift - Rafts To Paddle To Utopian Cuba (Views: 422, 2020-02-26, 7:05 am)
- That's wicked! LOL Babylon Bee, tomorrow's news - today. (Views: 241, 2020-02-26, 7:08 am)
- Let me start by saying I am no Bernie - fan. I do, however, feel (Views: 240, 2020-02-26, 7:42 am)
  - If Democrats try to use the coronavirus as a political - weapon against Trump like CNN is (Views: 240, 2020-02-26, 7:48 am)
    - CDC’s Messonnier is Rob Rosentein’s sister and the - WHO is a corrupt organization. (Views: 220, 2020-02-26, 7:51 am)
    - Something like this, you need a leader that - knows how to get (Views: 256, 2020-02-26, 8:03 am)
      - He could appoint a "czar" and do a bunch of public - relations BS like Obama did (Views: 215, 2020-02-26, 8:18 am)
      - He's not panicking people, the media is. He's going to - discuss it tonight at 6 pm. I also (Views: 178, 2020-02-26, 10:38 am)
      - The left's solution to everything is to just throw more - money at something. (Views: 214, 2020-02-26, 11:10 am)
      - Schumer's a liar. - So's Pelosi. (Views: 252, 2020-02-29, 10:38 am)
    - Whatever President Trump does, the left is going to - criticize and blame him anyway. (Views: 242, 2020-02-26, 8:26 am)
      - The biggest politicizer of all, Donald Trump. - I hope he sticks to (Views: 339, 2020-02-26, 8:38 am)
        The border logic makes perfect sense. Yes, it originated - in China but it's coming from all (Views: 246, 2020-02-26, 9:32 am)
        Brazil, Columbia, etc. Makes sense to me, too. - nm (Views: 213, 2020-02-26, 10:26 am)
      - So true, so true. This is China's fault, not Trump's. - On the upside, we finally found (Views: 249, 2020-02-26, 9:21 am)
        Nobody is blaming Trump for the "caronavirus", they are pointing out his incompetence in h - nm (Views: 281, 2020-02-27, 6:09 am)
        Are "they" experts? I watched his presser last night - and I saw no incompetence. (Views: 217, 2020-02-27, 6:17 am)
        BS. He's surrounding himself with experts. That's what - presidents do and even the experts (Views: 191, 2020-02-27, 6:19 am)
    - The globalism that Donald Trump was elected to confront - has struck back in a big way (Views: 230, 2020-02-26, 9:36 am)
    - They tried to blame Reagan for AIDS, too. Nothing - new. (Views: 207, 2020-02-26, 10:08 am)
- Now that's funny. We need to laugh. It's good for the - immune system. (Views: 225, 2020-02-26, 7:57 am)