A community of 30,000 US Transcriptionist serving Medical Transcription Industry

I'm in a bad mood

Posted: May 31, 2013

and we email every day about what we are doing, etc., but it seems like everything I do, she acts like I'm doing the wrong thing. Thinking of getting facial injections? you're nuts. it's inner beauty that counts. Wanting to try to get a promotion? you're nuts. You should be thinking about retirement. Thinking about retirement? you're nuts. You should be working on advancing your career. Thinking of taking a cruise? you're nuts. That's too expensive. Signed up for the football package on DirecTV? you're nuts. You need a budget. Well that's just some of the recent stuff. Must be nice to be so perfect, huh?

;

Oh my...Can I ask, why is she called "friend?" - MTJ

[ In Reply To ..]
Sounds like she drags you down and isn't a very good friend at all and is far too judgmental and hypercritical. :-( Maybe she has some other wonderful qualities that you appreciate? Otherwise, life is too short to allow a toxic person to make you miserable!

I think the problem is, SHE'S nuts! -sm- - In a NUTshell

[ In Reply To ..]
She's obviously seriously lacking in self esteem, if she has to repeatedly tell you things that lower yours.

Life is too short to have it polluted by such people.

Your reasons for befriending her are your own, but if it were me, I'd block her email address from my inbox.

Good Grief - see msg

[ In Reply To ..]
Wow, that's some friend. She sounds like a twit.

your friend - me

[ In Reply To ..]
I recently got fed up with my one friend who always asks me how this person is and that person is. She never asks me how I feel, and if she does, its cut short by, so how's Bob, how's Maria? And it seems like the conversation really gets no where. It also feels like the more I tell her about my life and my other friends, the more she knows. So I actually told her, You know what, you're asking too many questions, I'm hanging up. Bye, talk to you next week. I had to do this a few times before she got the message that I don't want to talk to her about anybody. She is the type that takes her cell phone with her everywhere we go, like a restaurant and looks at it all the time while I'm talking. I don't feel comfortable any more with people around me with cell phones. You never know if they are videotaping you either. Its annoying. Anyway, your friend sounds very lonely and has a need to tell people what to do. My sister is like that too. Just ignore her.

thanks y'all - I keep telling myself

[ In Reply To ..]
I keep telling myself I'll only talk to her about inconsequential things, or let her do the talking, but I don't have very many friends and I'm so isolated working from home. She's about the only friend I have.

No, she's not your only friend. We MTs on this - board are your friends, too!

[ In Reply To ..]
And I, for one, say that you're too nice a person to have someone putting you down all the time.

And don't forget your pets -animals are some of our best friends in this world.

Some of us, myself included, sometimes go through feast-or-famine periods when it comes to friends. I've gone through long years of not really having anyone I could call a true, trusted friend.

But, simply by living your life, and doing the things you enjoy, and sharing them with others (whether in person or online), eventually things do turn around. Eventually through my hobbies, I bet a few inclusive and supportive people, and now have lots of good friends.

And I think the internet is especially helpful in that regard. Where before, if you met a potential friend that you maybe saw once a week - in the park, or at church, or at yoga class or something, now it's possible to connect more frequently online (in a non-invasive, respective way, of course), and get to know each other faster. I'm finding that to be true with Facebook, as well. Acquaintances that I see occasionally, and would possibly take months or years to get to know, are becoming friends faster and more easily. Of course, that doesn't work in every situation, but it can definitely help frequently.

Of course, there are lots of different levels of friendship, as well. Some people I just talk to about inconsequential things, as you mentioned. Often they're people who are perfectly nice, but we both have completely different values, such as religion, politics, life philosophies, etc. There are only one or two that I could really go into in-depth discussions with.. not necessarily because we believe the same things, because in some instances we don't - but because we each accept each other for who we are inside.

That seems to be the main thing lacking with your friend. Maybe she's got some issues going on, as well. Maybe next time she tells you you're "nuts" for doing this, that, or whatever, you could counter her statement with a question such as, "That's interesting. Why do you say that?" and then see what she says.

I would say - tired of negative nellies

[ In Reply To ..]
Lordy, she sounds exactly like my mother.

Here's an idea - sm

[ In Reply To ..]
Tell her you have this "friend" you are having problems with and basically describe HER behavior to you. When she says you are nuts for being friends with that person, say "guess what, that person is YOU" Now thank you for understanding, bye bye:)

Gosh - JC

[ In Reply To ..]
I would not have a friend who is sooo condescending. You are actually being dysfunctional yourself for putting up with this nonsense.

I liked the poster who said to turn it around and ask her advice. LOL, that's pretty good.

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