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Am I a terrible parent?
Posted: Dec 14, 2009
I'll try to make this short as possible, but here goes...My DD (19) had Christmas plans that fell through. Her plans were made back in August; she was supposed to go with her "boyfriend" to his family's Christmas and spend 3 weeks with him, across the country from us. We also have a son, a DIL, and a 4-month-old granddaughter that I've seen once and my DH hasn't ever seen...so we made our plans to travel to their home for Christmas (they too live across the country...he's in the AF).
At the time I booked our plane tickets DD's plans were still intact..."no, no" she said, "I'm going with xxx." Well, about a week or so after I made our plans, her plans fell through. Of course now, the plane tickets to our destination are outrageous...I lucked out and somehow got a great deal on our tickets, but can't find that deal again to add 1 more ticket to our trip.
My question is...DD's going to be home without us for Christmas (we leave on the 24th and return the next week). I feel awful but simply do not have the money to buy her a plane ticket now. We also have a 10 YOS and in order to get her a ticket, we would have had to use his Christmas money, plus hers, to buy the ticket.
I feel bad for leaving her on Christmas, but on the other hand I feel she made her decision to spend the holidays with her ex-BF, so why should we all suffer because her plans got canceled? Am I an awful mother for leaving my child home alone on Christmas? She won't literally be alone...my family will be here...she has yet another BF here and he'll be home from school.. she's staying with her best friend, so she has plans...What do y'all think?
;
it depends, why did her plan fall through?....nm - plan
[ In Reply To ..]nm
she and the BF broke up... - loonngg story...nm
[ In Reply To ..]
if you do not have the money to pay for her ticket...nm - plan
[ In Reply To ..]the only solution is to leave her at home with the rest of the family. Not your fault! BTW, she is no baby anymore, she is an adult.
Merry Christmas!
I agree - Sheri
[ In Reply To ..]I agree she is 19 now and she was adult enough to make the plans and not spend Christmas with you, she is adult enough to understand not able to pay for a last minute airline ticket. She lives at home, I am assuming, and you see her all year long, but not your son and his family which includes a grandchild you do not get to see. Take this Christmas and enjoy spending it with your grandbaby. She will have family to have Christmas dinner with and you are still giving her gifts, correct, so she is not missing any of the Christmas activities, just not with you at that time. She was willing to not spend it with you before, so nothiing reallly has changed other than she will be home with other family for dinner. Merry Christmas. Hard to be a mom to adult children. My children are 23 and 19, so I am finding out how hard to be a mom to grown-up kids.
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