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sister in law refusing to feed baby solids until 6 months
Posted: Aug 17, 2014
obviously this is her first baby. She has been reading all of the articles and message boards/blogs where people breastfeed exclusively until 6 months of age. Well this is fine and dandy, when she mentioned her intentions early on in her pregnancy I didn't really care, it's not my kid and none of my business. However I noticed a few days ago my nearly 5 month old niece was excessively smacking her lips at a family dinner and screamed out a few times while watching us eat. They say the baby cries inconsolably for a few hours every night. I'm thinking, FEED THIS KID!!! I know it's not child abuse because they are giving her breast milk. But she also had to have several visits immediately after birth because she was not gaining weight as a breast fed baby.
For all of you who have new babies in the family what is the norm now? I know I gave my boys the tiniest bit of baby cereal in their bottles just to help them feel satisfied around 4 months of age. I know guidelines change but when your child is obviously hungry doesn't that mean it's time to feed them?
I don't want to interfere, I guess I am hoping you all say the same thing so I can put my mind at ease. Thanks!!
;
That's what the American Academy of Pediatrics recommends - link
[ In Reply To ..]If the baby is not gaining weight properly, then that is an issue your SIL needs to discuss with her pediatrician. Otherwise, there is nothing wrong with an infant being breastfed exclusively for the first 6 months.
Good Grief - see msg
[ In Reply To ..]I would say if the baby was content and meeting normal weight milestones, then there wouldn't be a problem.
The fact that this poor baby is smacking his lips when others are eating and cries inconsolably for hours and is not meeting weight milestones, tells me (who is not a pediatrician) that something is wrong here. I personally think what she's doing is cruel. She could at least do as you did and introduce some baby cereal or something. Where did she get this notion that only breast milk should be used until 6 months? Did she get confused? It doesn't have to be all or nothing. She can still breast feed, but she should also be giving the poor kid some pureed or cereal-type food.
Unfortunately, the authorities wouldn't view this as neglect or abuse, but I wonder if her pediatrician knows that she is only giving breast milk.
Neighbor close to me and I had babies - about the same time
[ In Reply To ..]This was years ago but her baby would cry and cry and she absolutely refused to feed except every 4 hours. I could not believe it then.
That is so mean - see msg please
[ In Reply To ..]That is so horribly mean to let a baby cry for hours, no matter what the reason. Awful. My husband's mother did that to him, and he learned to not trust his own appetite instincts and ended up extremely obese later in life when he had control over his own eating, and as a result has all sorts of health problems.
I don't know why people are so cruel to their own babies.
These Same People - see msg
[ In Reply To ..]These same people who let their babies cry for hours are probably the same ones who wouldn't let an animal whimper for 2 seconds.
The kid is showing signs of distress, and the mother not believing in solid foods until 6 months is not sufficient reason to neglect the kid's needs. Selfish of her.
I breastfed on demand for well over a year. - Old Hippie
[ In Reply To ..]I gave birth for first time at age 40 at home in a pool under the watchful eye of an awesome older granola-head midwife. Baby was put on breast immediately, skin-to-skin contact, cord still attached to the placenta still inside me, no rush to clamp the cord, no pressure to do anything but just "exist" in the moment.
I hardly ever left the house but when I did, I breastfed on demand, in public if necessary, because a baby doesn't cry for no reason. I also wore my baby everywhere, which was a total blast. As she was always with me, if she ever showed interest in something that I was eating (never did do baby food), I would let her play with it, but she didn't really start eating food with any sort of regularity until 10 months or so, about when she started to sprout teeth. She ate what I ate, just smooshed up with my fork or made teeny tiny bite size. I remember hunks of soft broccoli being her favorite to gnaw on and pretty much every type of fruit. Breastfed for comfort (bedtime w/story) until age 2; her only illness EVER was about 3 days of a minor cold/stuffy nose. I fully believe that breastfeeding is responsible for her wonderful health.
We have also coslept since day 1 and still do to this day even though she is 2-1/2 and we are loving every minute of it. We have never been happier as a couple and have been married for 20 years.
I'm old enough to thankfully not care about what anyone thinks of what I do, or how I do it, except for my baby. Our parents and in-laws are long since deceased, so no worry about "this is how I did it" unsolicited advice. I have always listened to my own body and now I listen to my baby's.
Moms, new moms especially, can't win for losing. Be there if she asks for help but otherwise, unless there is downright child neglect, please just observe.
:)
Great job! - Mary Roach
[ In Reply To ..]Ideal and wise way to bring up one's own child. Just in my opinion, what is best for each child is between the parent(s) and the pediatrician. It is no one else's business. Thank you for being such a great Mom! (BTW, breastfed for 2-1/2 years and coslept for 2-1/2, at which time she moved in to sleep with her sisters, as she did not wish to nor did she need to sleep alone. She only had one brief virus as a baby and was not sick until she went to elementary school. She is the healthiest of our three children still to this day and is very happy and well adjusted.)
I think I started feeding cereal - sm
[ In Reply To ..](just cereal plus breast feeding, no other foods) at 3 months or 4 months. However, I don't think that is a must. It depends on the baby. I also think if the baby is not gaining weight, SIL is probably not feeding long enough on 1 breast. For some reason, the idea that you had to switch breasts (because the first one would run out? LOL, not correct) was instilled in me 14 years ago. When I finally read a good book about breast feeding, it said not necessary to switch breasts in 1 sitting. Switch to the other side for next feeding only. If you switch, they get too much thin milk and not enough of the fat-containing rich milk. I don't remember the technical terms for the skim and fat milk. LOL. It's been 11 years since I breast fed. Anyway. I would not be surprised if that is the issue. However, I would have started giving my child cereal by now. I totally agree with you.
While on the subject of kids with first foods - how about this
[ In Reply To ..]Was at a theater the other night and saw 2 children, apparently siblings, and one looked to be about 5, the other 3 and both had pacifiers in their mouths. Ugh! I hate to see that after a certain age.
You know what? It is still not your child - Mind your own
[ In Reply To ..]You don't know how much the child eats or does not eat when you're not around. There are a lot of babies who don't gain weight immediately on breast milk but then they end up doing fine. Unless you're privy to the child's medical records, you don't know.
Baby cereal is made from grain and grain is horribly, horribly bad for a child less than 6 months old. Horrible.
Stay out of this.
you are right, it is not my child and I have not said anything - but when my mother brought it up
[ In Reply To ..]I was concerned too. But we still won't say anything unless she loses more weight.
Pediatrician said breast feed to a year - sm
[ In Reply To ..]This was 10 years ago. He was not a particularly gung ho natural type, so I was really surprised when, at 6 months, I eagerly asked, what food should I start with and he informed me breast feeding until a year was recommended and completely adequate.
Seems I remember a lot of people associating allergies and stomach problems with feeding solids and semi-solids early also
So, anyway, not unheard of to breastfeed for up to a year. I have also heard it said (advice during second child about 7 years ago) that if they are showing great interest in food to go ahead and introduce foods at about 6, but that breast feeding should still be the primary source of nutrition.
primary source of nutrition, yes but to wait a year to - introduce solids? Wow
[ In Reply To ..]I would be afraid they would have issues once you did introduce solids wanting to eat everything in sight and becoming overweight.
Agree - And...
[ In Reply To ..]...the baby is already showing signs of needing something more. Smacking lips while others are eating, not gaining weight, and unconsolable crying are 3 pretty serious signs that something is amiss here.
As to the grain discussion, I guess you'd prefer to have the kid starve, eh? Grains have been around for centuries and babies have done quite well on them. So, you'd prefer to torture the child, apparently, by starving the kid. Sweet.
Who said anything about starving the kid - I just said no grain
[ In Reply To ..]Baby-led weaning folks. There is solid evidence that giving a baby cereal grains before 6 months of age does damage to their digestive system.
If the baby is not getting enough satisfaction from breast milk, there's no reason to not give her mashed up table food - what you're eating.
It works for a lot of people out there.
Grains are bad for humans period. I don't care that they have been around for centuries. The human body did not evolve to digest them.
Especially not modern franken-wheat - !!!
[ In Reply To ..]Agree, especially not the high-yield dwarf wheat developed in the latter half of the 20th century. If I won't eat it, I sure wouldn't feed it to an infant.
didn't really happen that way - sm
[ In Reply To ..]being a breast feeder, I always cringe at those routine feeding times and people trying to cram in the rest of that bottle. Of course, I had to live with wondering if he was getting anything. He seemed to, he grew, but you always wonder, there's no fill level on the side of the ___.
Yeah, the pediatricians example to me was that he had a mother with twins that was still only breast-feeding at a year...
I breast fed w/o solids until 9 months. - L&L
[ In Reply To ..]My now 34 y/o daughter is quite healthy with 2 children of her own and a great career. Holding off on solids didn't hurt her any.
Yes, 6 months is the recommendation--sm - anon
[ In Reply To ..]Breast milk is completely sufficient for the first 6 months. There can be any number of reasons why the baby cried inconsolably for a while, and hunger is only one of those tissues. Teething? Gas? If the child is underweight now, then the pediatrician should be working with the parents.
One of the theories about food allergies now is that it may be related to introducing solids too early. We may have been eating grains for a long time but that does not mean they are not causing a problem. Along those lines then, rice cereal is the least irritating. This child may be ready but if her parents wait an additional one month, then it is not likely to be a big problem either.
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